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An Aro/Ace Valentine's Day


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I've discovered my aro/ace-ness about one year ago. I could probably find the date in my journal from when I went and raved about how heard I felt, but I'm too lazy...

Valentine's Day is kinda soon, and I want to celebrate, but obviously I don't have a partner. But I still want to do stuff with my friends!

What kind of things do you guys do on Valentine's Day? Do you have any traditions or ideas for this year in particular?

(And also if you have any Valentine's Day horror stories, I love reading about them!)

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I won't really be doing anything this year, but I like to send silly little Valentine's cards to my friends. Especially the fun aro/ace ones. Besides that, it'd just be having a nice Palentine's dinner with friends and expressing my appreciation of them. With some friends, we give each other yellow roses.

Do you have any ideas of what you'd like to do with your friends?

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I guess this might sound a bit weird, but I usually just chat with people on dating websites, and ask them about random stuff. Usually my matches are on other continents anyway, so it's just a time for me to be social and meet people. I've never had too much luck with IRL friends, as they are usually chilling with their partners and/or chilling with their friends that they have more in common with. The only cool thing that ever happened on valentine's day for me as an adult was going to an LGBTQ+ bar and club with one of my friends on valentine's day and then took a long walk afterwards in the most dangerous parts of the nearest major city in my region and talked about politics all night. We got some food at a random fast food place that was open at 2 AM but there were some sketchy guys that wanted to harass us and since we weren't in a car we couldn't go through the drive-through line.

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Every year my mom and I go buy a bunch of chocolate and my dad leaves some kind of surprise for everyone before he leaves for work. Valentine's Day has always been about familial and platonic love, rather than romantic love for me. Other than that, the only thing that was special about Valentine's Day was giving out classroom Valentines to my friends and teachers in grade school and my sped teacher bringing tiny cupcakes. And that one time that my school had a Valentines candy gram fund raiser and I got one from some anonymous fellow. 

Edited by Skylord
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On every valentine's day, my friend reveals his crush to whoever his new crush is and then runs away super embarrassed before his crush can say anything. Then we eat lunch together and give each other candy and I rant about how much I don't understand crushes.

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On 1/30/2021 at 7:11 PM, MulticulturalFarmer said:

The only cool thing that ever happened on valentine's day for me as an adult was going to an LGBTQ+ bar and club with one of my friends on valentine's day and then took a long walk afterwards in the most dangerous parts of the nearest major city in my region and talked about politics all night. We got some food at a random fast food place that was open at 2 AM but there were some sketchy guys that wanted to harass us and since we weren't in a car we couldn't go through the drive-through line.

I love the nights when you just go around with friends and do sketchy or adventurous stuff. Best homecoming of my life was the one I went to with a group of friends!

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Valentine's Day practically does not exist for me and I don't celebrate it in any way. It's a day like any other day and since my birthday is in February, I always associated the month with mine and especially my dad's birthday. But I like some of the ideas you guys came up with here, like sending silly aro/ace cards to friends and the dinner idea sounds really great. Thanks for the input.

Edited by NotHeartless
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I've never got valentines day, it just seems very commercialised and I forget it happens unless it was for the shops or the social media posts. I highly doubt it will ever change ?

Also love the username, starkid for the win

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  • 1 year later...
Guest AroAceTrombone

As an aroace, I don't have a partner. So, i spend  valentines day thinking about me and the people I love like my family, friends, and pets. 

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  • 1 year later...

In my case, it's just in my culture Valentine's Day isn't that widely celebrated (it's a very recent loaned tradition) and not pressured or forced on us the way you guys seem to have it, so I don't have negative feelings about it. I am just kind of playfully sceptical/condescending to it occasionally, like calling it Pink Sap Day (I actually heard another person in the Internet do it and liked it:)) This year, I'm planning to use it as excuse and motivation to draw some of fictional couples that I genuinely am invested in. 

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I never usually do anything on valentines day, but this year I think I’ll be a little more “celebratory”…

Of course, by that I mean I’m going to send goofy valentine gifs to my friends and then buy a box of chocolates and eat it with my family.

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I don’t know about anyone else but I get anxiety about if from the fear that somebody will ask me out or say they have a crush on me 👀 does anybody have any tips for maybe rejecting people without really coming out?? 
Anyways, probably will do galentines day and ‘celebrate’ with my homies 🥰

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Some Aro ways to respond to "I love you"

 

Bro, I have literally never seen you in my life. Why are you telling me this.

Well, you've made a mistake there, my friend.

Good for you. I guess.

Cool.

Okie dokie! Now get away from me.

IDC.

No.

Why.

Alright. See ya never.

Hey, wanna see a magic trick? Poof! You've been rejected.

 

+ these --> Alternate responses to I love you : r/aromantic

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  • 2 weeks later...

i never cared for valentine's day even before i realized i was aro, but ever since i've made it a tradition to turn valentine's day into a second halloween by marathoning horror movies lmao. this year i'm doing a re-animator marathon.

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You guys are going to hate me (I say this jokingly, of course lol) but I went on a date for Valentine's Day! It was a date in the loose sense, as I was meeting two coworkers over Zoom and we were trying to get acquainted to see if the three of us are compatible as potential roommates. This will be further explored with an upcoming in-person "date".

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