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  3. Umm, I dont know if Guest Eggerson still needs our help since they posted in September, but I wanted to throw in my head in as well. If you are still checking in here, I find the Split Attraction Model a really useful way of thinking. For most people their romantic and sexual attraction is the same and hard to keep apart. And aroace people have that in common with allo people. I am aroace and I dont think its invalidating when sex is mentioned positively. But that is because I am sex-favorable and I defend the idea that my sexual attraction does not define how I feel about sex. If you are ace you are not sexually attracted to any gender and if you are aromantic you are not romantically attracted to any gender, right? And whether I am sex averse, indifferent or favorable is a whole other thing. I am saying all this because because for me being ace doesnt mean I dont want to have sex or not read about it. I know I am hardly speaking for the majority of ace people. But you know, its a spectrum. We are a diverse community. And I am sorry allo aro people feel like they are thrown under the ace umbrella. I know its a problem.
  4. Ha, same here. I'm definitely not asexual, and I'm also definitely aromantic. A lot of the "symptoms" of sexual attraction and romantic attraction overlap, so sometimes it can be difficult to differentiate what type of attraction you're really feeling. It took me a really long time to realize that while I was attracted to people, I wasn't comfortable with a relationship-- and that's okay! I also agree that aces and aros are often lumped together with no distinction. I can see how this is a problem on both sides: us aroallos (aromantic, allosexual) don't like the assumption that we're ace, and I can only assume alloaces (alloromantic, asexual) don't like the assumptoion that they're aro. I think part of the problem is that media puts so much focus on both relationships and sex that aces and aros alike can get overwhelmed. And when we create spaces for ourselves specifically where we can feel free to reject those ideas, it can feel invalidating for someone to come in and say that they like those things. So if an aroace is viewing an aro community and sees a post that mentions sex positively, it might feel invalidating to them. And if an aroace comes to an ace community and sees posts that mention falling in love or relationships in a positive way, it might also feel invalidating. However, it feels invalidating for aroallos and alloaces to see posts condemning sex or relationships in our spaces, if those are things that we have no reason to reject. I see posts in the various aro subreddits that exclusively relate to aces, and I'm sure there are anti-relationship posts in ace spaces that don't necessarily mention sex. It's complicated lol!
  5. Alas, My Alligator Ran Away! Nobody Take Him! MACARONI
  6. Hi, welcome to the forum
  7. This was really well put. It's unfortunate the internet groups asexuality and aromanticism together. And congratulations on understanding yourself and what you want. That's difficult and awesome.
  8. I feel that. I'm allosexual aromantic myself, so I'm open if you want someone to talk to about it.
  9. I think if you've never felt romantic attraction, can't see yourself feeling romantic attraction, but want a relationship or marriage for things like sex or finances then yeah you're probably aromantic.
  10. true, I have a beautiful cat TPBM likes art
  11. hi, welcome cool that you are here, hope you find something of use here. If you are not sure about your aro identity feel free to describe what you feel, people here tend to be quite good at guiding people to identities or ideas they might find useful.
  12. I discovered I'm not "purely aromantic" but rather grayromantic. It's because I sometimes feel some sort of attraction which isn't really platonic but also not really romantic. Might be alterous attraction then (besides sensual, aesthetic and platonic attraction which I experience [except for sensual attr.] rather frequently). I also still have a hard time to distinguish platonic and romantic attraction because to me it feels the same. It's really indistinct since I take my friendships just as serious as an alloromantic would probably take their romo relationship. The latter makes me uncomfortable and I don't desire it even when I like someone a lot (to my standards). I think gray fits me the best that's why I use it.
  13. ...false? alksfj i don't really have a preference either way but since i type more, i'll go with saying false. TPBM has a pet
  14. cyancat

    Acronym game

    Never Ever Underestimate Trans Rights On Injectable Steroids AMARANTH
  15. ’Neutrois’ is created of two French words: one which means ’neutral’ and other for ’three’. It’s literally ’third neutral gender’ and this term was created by H.A. Burnham in 1995.
  16. Guest

    Am I aromantic?

    Okay, me again. Guess I did remember to check this after all- Actually, I ll be honest, I didn t even remember that I posted it. (which is why, kids, you don t stay up till 1am, and if for some reason you do decide to stay up till 1am, don t post random things on the internet) I had copied it though and this morning when I wanted to paste something, I woke up with my two and a half pages essay about maybe being aro. So... fun times, fun times. I don t regret posting it though, I m glad that I gathered up the courage to do it. Thank you lots for the two replies so far! You could say you- aro-se from your slumber and responded? No? Was that terrible? I m such a disgr-ace with all these puns and deserving of a pun-isment and- Putting that aside- yes, I m surprised that people actually took the time to read through that mess and post answers, especially so quickly? Idek why I didn t actually imagine I ll get responses this fast. Also- maybe I should make an account on here so that I can easily return. Okay so... the main point s talking to her, I suppose. Yeah, I m aware that I shouldn t stay in a relationship if it s making me even mildly uncomfortable, especially without talking things through with my gf, I guess I m just scared of what she ll say and I m scared of making her upset and whatnot? What if she won t understand how I feel and she ll take it personally or something- and what if it ll put an end to our friendship or turn it awkward. I wouldn t mind continuing as we were till now and being just friends- (Ah I could rant all day about why I don t like the phrase "just friends" since it implies that friendships and/or platonic love are somehow less important than romantic/sexual relationships. As if different types of love don t exist and/or as if they can even be compared. But that s so beside my point and only tangentially related to what I m talking about. So to get back on track.) And um, I guess that I wish I could be romantically attracted to her- though most probably I ll never be. And I feel bad for even saying that. Perhaps they aren t even well grounded fears and all but... And I m pretty aware that communication is the key. Soo I should wait a bit more, see how things go then somehow get myself to talk to her. Hoping she ll be understanding. And I shouldn t force myself. Okay- I m. Trying. Thanks again and stay safe, in case anyone else decides to comment anything on the thread I ll be sure to check it
  17. I'm Stacky, currently identifies as a asexual blob of red. Could be aro or grey-ro or something, not sure. But hi
  18. False. The problem with the cave is when you're in the cave, you're extremely inside the cave. TPBM likes writing by hand more than typing
  19. Man, I Like Ingrid. Though It's Arduous. NEUTROIS
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