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You might be aro if...


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On 4/8/2016 at 5:06 AM, Cassiopeia said:

You might be aro if you mistook sexual, aesthetic or sensual attraction for a crush.

 

You might be aro if you thought romantic feelings described by others must be exaggerated.

 

You might be aro if you never notice when someone has a crush on you, unless someone points it out to you.

 

You might be aro if you broke somebody's heart by accident, even without realizing it, simply because you underestimated the intensity of their feelings.

 

You might be aro if you felt suffocated and overwhelmed in a romantic relationship.

 

You might be aro if the pet names people gave to their partners, always felt artificial and ridiculous to you.

Dang, all of these has happened to me at least once. Thanks for clearing things up lol.

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  • 1 month later...
Guest confused
On 12/28/2018 at 4:51 PM, Berry said:

Ymbai you didn’t know that a crush was different from romantic love.

pause .... how is a crush different from romantic love ??

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That's the difference between attraction and love. I can't realy explain as the line is a bit confused for me, but romantic love is more intense I guess. When someone has a crush, it is not in love yet, though it can lead to that if they explore this relationship That's how I see it : a crush grows into romantic love. That's why the "I love you" thing is such a big deal (wich confused me for a long time).

Maybe, it's a bit like the difference between thinking someone is nice and it would be good to be friend with, and actually be friend with this person.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Oh jeez. I relate to basically all of these posts. ?

Also, YMBAI you didn't date anyone until you were 16/17 and then felt nothing and/or relieved after breaking up with them... (This is my personal experience that made me question my orientation and then discover and identify with the words "aromatic" and "asexual")

Edited by AroaceParrot
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YMBAI you identified as bi/panromantic because you’ve figured you like girls and boys equally after a long struggle of deciphering your feelings — as though grasping at barely existent straws.

Bonus points if you specifically chose to identify as pan because the idea of being attracted to someone because of anything to do with them was the weirdest shit ever/you just couldn’t see it happening for you. The all-encompassing, hand-waving, regardless of pan-romanticism [vs omni’s all and bi’s many] happened to be very convenient for your don’t-want-to-think-about-the-specifics-of-your-preferences agenda.

this is 100% a pointed jab at i, me, myself, and myself alone.

Edited by cyancat
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7 hours ago, cyancat said:

YMBAI you identified as bi/panromantic because you’ve figured you like girls and boys equally after a long struggle of deciphering your feelings — as though grasping at barely existent straws.

...yes... 

I did identify as panromantic for a while, but It never felt quite right. I'm still, to some extent, open to romantic relationships regardless of gender, and in the beginning, I took that as being panromantic, it never had anything to do with attraction. 

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  • 3 weeks later...
On 2/22/2018 at 1:15 AM, Alyssia said:

YMBAI you find it difficult to play the fuck marry kill game 

YMBAI you feel unconfortable when someone flirts with you and you would like to disappear

A friend played this with my close friends without me knowing or actively joining. He chose to kill me. I said ‘good, thanks’

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On 1/1/2021 at 6:07 AM, Guest confused said:

pause .... how is a crush different from romantic love ??

Interesting. Different people experience attraction differently. 

On 1/13/2021 at 5:55 PM, AroaceParrot said:

Oh jeez. I relate to basically all of these posts. ?

Also, YMBAI you didn't date anyone until you were 16/17 and then felt nothing and/or relieved after breaking up with them... (This is my personal experience that made me question my orientation and then discover and identify with the words "aromatic" and "asexual")

We didn't date until we were 21.... That was interesting. It didn't last very long. 

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 You might be aro (and not necessarily ace) if you mistook sexual, platonic, or any other attraction for romantic attraction, then thought that you couldn't possibly be aromantic when you heard the term, simply because attraction makes no sense to you. 

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For me, I suspected that I was Aro when I first heard it being discussed on YouTube. Then I asked myself, "Is that really what I am? But I still think that having some form of significant other might be nice." Then I asked myself the really big question. Why? I came up with 3 answers right away. 1: Sex. 2: As a safety net in case something went terribly wrong. 3: Convenience, so that we can each do the chores that the other one is bad at. I then sat there for 20 minutes trying & failing to think of a 4th reason.

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YMBAI you where sad when your friends stopped hanging with you because they found a significant other and felt that time with you was less "worth" than time with them.

Ps. Sorry if dark but I think is more common in our community and didn't want to feel alone in this.

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On 2/19/2021 at 4:22 AM, Blake said:

Ps. Sorry if dark but I think is more common in our community and didn't want to feel alone in this.

no worries, you aren't alone. I certainly have the same fears and plenty of other people do too. There was this article a while back on aurea about fears and so many of them talk about friends leaving for romantic relationships which they see as more important.

https://www.aromanticism.org/en/news-feed/my-aromantic-fears-part-one

 

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On 2/8/2021 at 12:10 PM, Skylord said:

You might be aro (and not necessarily ace) if you mistook sexual, platonic, or any other attraction for romantic attraction

I’m aroace and honestly, looking back on my life, I’ve confused other forms of attraction for sexual and romantic attraction simply because I didn’t know any better. I just assumed that’s how everyone else also felt.

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On 9/22/2020 at 6:17 PM, Neon Green Packing Peanut said:

Anyway, YMBAI you deliberately avoid situations that could be misinterpreted as romantic/having a crush on.

Yes that was me, I did that to the extent that I didn’t draw guys because someone might say they where hot it backfired I have the hardest time drawing dudes now 

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On 11/10/2020 at 7:42 AM, Spark_TheDemiboyRat said:

You might be aro if you mistook sexual, aesthetic or sensual attraction for a crush.

 

Ugh. The fact that I didn’t figure that out at an earlier age is so annoying, but I didn’t know it was a thing.

I’m also asexual, so I mistook aesthetic and sensual attractions as romantic and sexual. 
 

I’m pretty sure I’m aromantic. I’ve never had any desire for a romantic relationship, I have no clue at all as to what romantic attraction actually is, and I have always had no interest whatsoever in dating. Also seeing “romantic” things on TV/media makes me cringe or involuntarily say “ew”.

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On 4/8/2016 at 5:06 AM, Cassiopeia said:

You might be aro if you mistook sexual, aesthetic or sensual attraction for a crush.

 

You might be aro if you thought romantic feelings described by others must be exaggerated.

 

You might be aro if you never notice when someone has a crush on you, unless someone points it out to you.

 

You might be aro if you broke somebody's heart by accident, even without realizing it, simply because you underestimated the intensity of their feelings.

 

You might be aro if you felt suffocated and overwhelmed in a romantic relationship.

 

You might be aro if the pet names people gave to their partners, always felt artificial and ridiculous to you.

Omg all of these happened to me at least once and most happened recently before I realized I could've been aro or on the spectrum. This helped so much lol ?

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  • 2 months later...

YMBAI, similarly to identifying as bi/pan because of "equal" attraction to people regardless of gender, you identified as polyamorous because you thought you experienced romantic attraction to all of your friends and that ended up just being strong platonic/queerplatonic attraction.

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On 2/21/2018 at 10:15 AM, Alyssia said:

YMBAI you find it difficult to play the fuck marry kill game 

PLEASE whenever I play this I just go in order of who I would want to have sex with most->least. Most = marry cuz I can have it more than just the once and down from there lmao

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16 hours ago, StanEvelynn said:

PLEASE whenever I play this I just go in order of who I would want to have sex with most->least. Most = marry cuz I can have it more than just the once and down from there lmao

Good plan, I played that a few times in school and I think my friends thought I was some sort of psychopath

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