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About Blake

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    Advanced Member
  • Birthday April 17

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    University student

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  1. Hey there mate, glad you found us ^^ one is never too late to be here. Here you go, some treats (Insert tasty coffee and awesome homemade key lime pie)
  2. No problem. Hopefully it will help you like it has to me.
  3. This is blissful. I have a candle that smells like one of my favorite coffee shop. I only use it when I want to feel completely at peace and has endured more than a year so far. Idk what I am gonna do once it is depleted since the person that did it is no longer living where I am
  4. Hey there Mel ^^ you don't have to be nervous in here. We are all a community and we want to help each other whenever we can. Glad you found this site and welcome! On the labels, the prefix means the same in both romantic and sexual so a bi-sexual/romantic is someone that is attracted to two genders sexually/romantic. The labels are tricky to understand sometimes but any specific question just ask it and we'll do our best to help you understand.
  5. Hi! The way I deal with the questions is by saying that I am interested in my studies first, after that, only the future will tell. For the matchmaking I would go and say that if the person that you are matchmaking me can't help me fulfill my goals, then I am not interested. Thus you get a chance to change the subject by speaking of your plans for the future. People have very short memory when it comes to this kind of things, so redirecting convos is easier and asking about their plans works wonders (people like to speak of themselves) Now, in my experience, I say outright that I am not looking for a relationship at the moment and I ask them about their lives. But people not always like that answer and try to question me, and then I pass to ask them if they are hitting on me which then makes them uncomfortable as hell which I love and then ask them nicely about series of netflix. Which then they go to and don't bother me ^^.
  6. @aro_elise There is a a sense of wholeness for me when I listen to their songs and scream it all out. And yup for me their peak was sempiternal, the new ones are good but they can't compete with it. @Circe The smell of my onesie after it has been cleaned is so dam beautiful. Sure, the softener plays a role, but since it is one piece only it is in me everywhere ^^
  7. My band that was love at first listen was Bring Me The Horizon. The song was Hospital for the Souls. I loved every song of that album, Sempiternal. I would love to explore new places, to go hiking fro a whole weekend with my friends and just chill, and shall put them on plans when this pandemic is over.
  8. I love looking at the ocean, but not on the beach, from a high point where the walls are high and you can hear the crashing of the waves. I haven't dived per se, only have swam to the seafloor a few times about 15 ft or so cuz I have good lungs. I do baking ^^ mostly brownies and cookies. And I love coffee so I can relate to have a goof cup of coffee with breakfast alone ^^. When the pandemic is over I am going to visit coffee shops around where I live to taste them all.
  9. Hey there, well your situation is kinda similar to what I experienced in my past relationship. What I can tell you is that the convo should happen. Steps? First sit them down, and have something to drink. Look at their eyes and start saying what you are feeling, what you have felt and how you have felt it. Look up what is your label and explain it to them. You have to be sincere, but you should expect tears, and your partner will most probably feel betrayed. This is not your fault, you cannot control how you feel, keep it in mind. Let them know that you are there for the long run, but the rules have changed mid way and now both have to deal with the new rules (you being aro-spec). It is not your fault, you discovered something about you and you want to keep your partner up to date. Talk it out, and try to find a happy medium, don't do anything you do not feel comfy, but understand that your partner also is a person and don't expect that they will accept everything from the get go. It will take time, and a lot of effort but it can be done if you want it. Hope it helps, cheers.
  10. When I get sunburned I use Aloe vera It is I think a brand. Makes me feel really good, and it is in any pharmacy, at least form the east coast of US.
  11. True there I got sidetracked. Well I don't know anyone who is in this situation but I want to believe it may be more common than we think. Just that it not a theme that is out so easily in a convo. That requires a lot of trust to speak about your sexual life with a friend. Also, the definition of a close friend varies from people to people. A close friend for me is someone I would give my liver for, nothing less than that. The problem is that from what I have read here, people tend to develop romantic feelings after a while, which brings to question the time lapse from the question. Just how much can a relationship last between someone in the aro-spec and someone who isn't there and that person who isn't aro-spec doesn't develop romantic feelings. Cuz I am interpreting it that the close friend isn't inside the spectrum. (I don't know anyone who is aro-spec irl)
  12. It depends of the culture, at least that is what I think. If you where raised in a very religious environment from an early age, then you are more likely to view fwb and fuck buddies as something bad. Which isn't the case ofc, it is just two persons sharing their time to do activities, and one of those activities is sex, but it can include go to eat together, beaches, coffee dates (which are my faves). If you where raised in a less strict environment, more open minded, then you may see fwb very differently. It all falls to what kind of feed you where given, and if you where not taught to question what you are told. If you think outside what society tells you, and follow what you think is the right choice, then you will see that you have choices. Sadly, not everyone has the luxury to stand up and give their opinion, without risking exposing themselves to a dangerous situation. So yeah, maybe in US is less common to see a fwb than it is in Germany or Australia. but it is linked to a social environment, and the tolerance of society in that place. Personally, i am looking for one, but the pandemic is making it impossible, so I will have to wait till we can have a social life again to start the search. And then, find that person who doesn't want romance (which will be hard but I ain't giving up easily).
  13. Hi! welcome there mate. Glad you decided to join this forum. and also glad you found someone that wants the same as you ^^ that is pleasant to read. You can rant all you want, it is your choice to rant, since then you may find others who feel the same and then share ideals. Now, take this coffee as token of welcome (insert tasty coffee and key lime pie as bonus)
  14. Cold showers are amazing. Even more on summer, and I loooove my pyjamas. Since I am currently working from my house, my pjs became my work clothes and no shame in them. I feel more productive in my onsie that I have ever felt in any other kind of clothes. ^^ so I can sympathize with that moment when you just let everything fall from you and just go take a shower and then netflix or the bed.
  15. This reminds me of something a friend of mine does. He is always chewing something, always. The only time he isn't chewing is when he is sleeping, and when I asked him, he told me it is his mode to relax. ^^ We all have our little things that makes us happier, even tho it isn't seen as something important.
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