SaltyArrow Posted August 29, 2021 Share Posted August 29, 2021 Does anyone else cringe anytime anyone says 'just friends' or 'more than friends'? Like my friends say it all the time and I know they don't do it with malice and appreciate friendship but it still kinda makes me cringe 16 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustMe Posted August 29, 2021 Share Posted August 29, 2021 I hate the word "just" so much bc nothing ist "just" .... And especially 'just friends' is disapproving the worth of friendships. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nonmerci Posted August 29, 2021 Share Posted August 29, 2021 Oh yeah totally. It devaluates friendship so much. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roboticanary Posted August 29, 2021 Share Posted August 29, 2021 Yeah. Not keen on that. Someone who thinks of friendship like that is totally someone you can rely on? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Erederyn Posted August 30, 2021 Share Posted August 30, 2021 Most definitely. I find it rather dismissive of friendships, like they're not a big deal... or that they're a relationship not worth pursuing and valuing in itself 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elin W Posted September 2, 2021 Share Posted September 2, 2021 On 8/29/2021 at 11:40 AM, SaltyArrow said: Does anyone else cringe anytime anyone says 'just friends' or 'more than friends'? Like my friends say it all the time and I know they don't do it with malice and appreciate friendship but it still kinda makes me cringe Yeah I certainly do!! Especially when I feel that my love for my closest friends are stronger than most people feel about their romantic partners. ❤️ 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TRexPhilbo Posted September 3, 2021 Share Posted September 3, 2021 Yes - it's... ew 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just a Bear Posted September 3, 2021 Share Posted September 3, 2021 I don't. romantic feelings as far as I know, make the person feel more important or something else besides friendship. there is more element of attraction, so the relationship is more. I don't feel it devalues friendship so much so as it emphasizes the value of romance. So, I don't find it cringe at all. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SaltyArrow Posted September 4, 2021 Author Share Posted September 4, 2021 On 8/29/2021 at 8:25 PM, JustMe said: I hate the word "just" so much bc nothing ist "just" .... And especially 'just friends' is disapproving the worth of friendships. Yeah ikr, one of my friends used the phrase 'nothing more than friends' the other day and like is this what you think about me?! ? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mewix Posted September 7, 2021 Share Posted September 7, 2021 Tbh I say the first one though I say I just want to be friends, because it implies I don't want the other thingy. I don't like more than friends however because friends r important already. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Artemis's Aro Posted September 19, 2021 Share Posted September 19, 2021 I hate it so much when they say "just friends" as if friendship can't be one of the strongest connections in the world. And the implications of that phrase make me sad anyways. People constantly choose romantic partners over friends, regardless of how new the partnership is and how long the friendship has gone, and it just makes me so sad. :( 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blake Posted September 19, 2021 Share Posted September 19, 2021 To be honest, I did not give it much thought until now. I used the first to say that I wanted nothing more, just be friends with the person and be chill together. I can see how that is dismissive of a platonic relationship now, so I would not use it again for that reason because I value friendship a lot. Few people can actual say that we are friends and the statement be true, because I have to consider the person to be a friend first before acknowledging that they are indeed my friend and it has to be a 2-way path. Anyone can say that we are friends, that doesn't mean we are, at least that is what I believe. I want to add to this that it is hard to find someone who is the opposite sex and be friends with them, because the automatic response or scenario is that they think you want to be friends so later you can have sex with them, as that being friends is a prerequisite for sex. I don't believe that having sex and being friends are hand in hand, nor that one leads to the other. This is me ranting about people misinterpreting my intentions to start a convo. I iust want to talk to you and maybe befriend you so we can go grab a cup of coffee and talk about life, I have zero intentions to have sex with you, I just want more friends that I can drink coffee with. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robin144 Posted November 23, 2021 Share Posted November 23, 2021 Oh yeah totally. It's so cringe and annoying! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Georgi Posted November 23, 2021 Share Posted November 23, 2021 (edited) It used to disturb me a lot and sometimes it still does, as I haven't come to terms with it from an emotional point of view... but from inquiries of my romantic friends, it does seems that romance it's more for (most of) them and yeah, I try to understand that and be more okay with it and accept that people feel differently and have different priorities. But being more open about this also helped some of my friends give more importance to our friendship too and not take it for granted, so there is middle ground. We are both trying to understand that they are different and it matters to be intentional, so that's something. Edited November 23, 2021 by Georgi Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alto Posted November 23, 2021 Share Posted November 23, 2021 I say it quite a bit, and I wince every time I do. It's just so automatic and hard to stop myself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
atrocious_ar0mantic Posted December 3, 2021 Share Posted December 3, 2021 On 8/29/2021 at 5:40 AM, SaltyArrow said: Does anyone else cringe anytime anyone says 'just friends' or 'more than friends'? Like my friends say it all the time and I know they don't do it with malice and appreciate friendship but it still kinda makes me cringe All the time. It implies a hierarchal structure with relationships, valuing romo ones as the highest, and platonic ones as the lowest. With platonic ones often being viewed as a stepping stone for romo ones, more often than not. And obviously completely excluding other types of relationships, ones that fall into gray areas or are another thing entirely (such as QPRs/QPPs) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
frutiger aro Posted December 11, 2021 Share Posted December 11, 2021 absolutely. to me it dismisses friendship as a lesser bond and it bugs the crap out of me. even worse to me is the concept of the "friendzone", as if friendship is some obstacle that needs to be overcome. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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