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Artemis's Aro

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  1. Yeah a little. I feel like we're often an after-thought on positivity posts, and most of the aro representation I've found (already sparse) was aroace content instead of aroallo. I don't mind it too much since I still relate a lot to the aro aspect of it, and since we don't have much representation in general, but I'd love to see more aroallo stuff around. Edit: also I just remembered that when I came out to my friends literally all of them assumed I was also ace. So yeah, I think a little bit more aro-allo rep would be welcomed.
  2. I understand what you mean. Personally, I struggled with labeling my sexuality for a few years, until I kinda just gave up and said "queer" and that's it. With aromanticism, it was much easier to label myself. I found the word and promptly started using it. Also I totally relate about not being able to figure out sexuality because you can't actually experiment with it since you're socially anxious. I've questioned being ace-spec, but I know that it's mostly just me being too scared to think about sexuality with someone I don't already trust, and honestly that's a little hard to find outsi
  3. Maybe you should think about approaching future relationships as looking for a queer/quasiplatonic relationship (QPR)? The actual definition and actions in a QPR differ from relationship to relationship, but for me, at least, it's sort of like a committed friendship. Like "I don't want to date in the traditional sense but I do still want to be with you for a long time." Cuddles not kisses and all that. And yeah, it still might be hard to find this type of relationship because you'd still have to find someone who is willing to enter this kind of relationship. Its more likely if the other p
  4. Wow I feel some of this in the form of alterous/platonic attraction towards squishes, but there's parts I've never felt that are the main reason I identify as aromantic. I've felt those butterflies, but always because of something stressing me out, like a presentation or the possibility of being embarrassed in class. I remember that with my first strong squish I had lots of random anxiety from other sources, and I would always try and force myself to attribute it to the squish instead, because I almost kept hoping I had a crush on her rather than something I couldn't name. I did end up be
  5. I understand how you feel. I've never had a crush or desired a romantic relationship in the way everyone around me did, but I remember still wishing that I had someone I could depend on in a similar manner, almost to the extent of a romantic relationship but without a lot of the romantic aspects. I've even regretted not being able to feel romantic attraction. I'm in a qpr now, and I'm honestly really happy this way. I've found someone I love, and who still understands that I am aromantic and not looking for certain aspects of a relationship. If you still want partnership without roma
  6. My qpp and I both like board-games, and there's this board-game cafe downtown that I'm thinking of taking her to, so I guess that would be an ideal date? Idk I think in general my ideal date would be spending time with someone in fun settings (roller-skating, games, chilling at home, looking through a bookstore) rather than super intimate settings (I find stuff like candle-lit dinners to be repulsive). It also depends on the person. For instance, there's places I want to go with my current qpp that I did not want to go with my last squish, and there's places I don't want to go with my qpp
  7. I like to think I'm in a sort of "glass closet" situation but honestly I'm scared to come out to new people because I never know how they'll react. I know that 99% of the time they'll need a vocab lesson, but what I don't know is where they'll go from there. Will the accept it? Will they tell me I'm just trying to be special? I don't know, so I usually don't like to tell a lot of people I'm aro. I have, however, told almost all my closer friends, and I've told my brother, because I like making aro jokes all the time.
  8. I guess it depends on the person. I see kissing as romantic, but I love the idea of holding hands or cuddling with someone I'm close with. If you mean romantic as in a situation, then there might be clues here and there that someone likes you (you can google the signs of a crush), and usually their actions might have the ulterior motive of wanting to date. I know I wouldn't be comfortable with touching someone if there was a chance that they liked me that way, not unless we're close already and I'm comfortable with it. So I guess the other people's motives might make a situation romantic
  9. What I get from this whole thread is communication is key. I'll make sure to talk to her about all this. Thanks everyone for your input! I think it'll go well.
  10. Context: I am aromantic heterosexual, and the girl I want to be in a QPR with is biromantic asexual, and I'm pretty sure she already has a crush on me. We both love each other a lot, but I know that she probably feels some type of romantic feelings for me that I can't reciprocate. She knows I'm aroallo, so she probably hasn't said anything because she knows it would make me uncomfortable. We've both joked around with pet names like "wife" and "zucchini" (I explained what a QPR is) and I think I would be comfortable in a QPR with her. I think we're even already in an unofficial QPR. The t
  11. barbacoa, sacapuntas, fe i know i have some in english but it seems ive forgotten them so if i remember i'll add them
  12. lmao my latest aro moment was when I was trying to write a scene for nanowrimo and I got stuck bc I Still haven't figured out what the relationship between two of my main characters is going to be. I kinda want it to be romantic but I have absolutely no idea how to write it convincingly bc it's never going to really convince me.
  13. (I have a more to say but I'm not exactly sure how to word it, so here's a little anyways.) Yeah I've been thinking about this too. I know it's a common experience to feel "broken" before realizing you're aro/ace, but honestly? I never felt that way. I felt weird sometimes about being aro but it just seems pretty normal to not like people. I think it has to do with the culture surrounding romance, how it socializes people into needing it, even if it might not be exactly what they want. I also have a couple of friends who could be aro or aspec, and one of them even briefly iden
  14. cavetown on YouTube is an aspec creator. His music is pretty cool.
  15. I have a lot of friends who were supportive when I came out. Of course, most of them were super confused and I had a few screenshots ready of explanations I sent to them, but afterwards they understood. Some of them even sent me aro memes! One of the friends I came out to was a little more skeptical from the others, though. She's well-meaning, but honestly she's like the external embodiment of my own doubts. She keeps asking if I'm sure I'm aro or that maybe I'm just clinging on to the label so much that I don't want to actually experience romance. One of her arguments was "everybo
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