Zema Posted September 17, 2016 Share Posted September 17, 2016 I'm actually amazed that a thread like this hasn't been made yet. So how did you discover you were aro-spec? Everyone's discovery process is bound to be different I'm interested in what made you realise you were aro-spec . For me, I'm not entirely sure how I came to the conclusion that I am aromantic. I mean, I know now that it's correct, but I'm not entirely sure what it was that made me say for sure that I was. There was no big, "ahah!" moment for me. For a long while I assumed I was heteromantic just because. It doesn't help that I am aesthically attracted to people, but didn't know what type of attraction it was before I reaised I was aro. I know now that it's aesthetic attraction and nothing else, but still. When you have no basis for comparison, it's difficult to tell what something like that is. I identified as grey-romantic for a while, mainly because amatonormavity and the fact that while I was attracted to people (obviously mistaking it for romantic attraction), that was exceedingly rare. I think I've only ever been attracted to about 10 people in my life. I guess what finally made me identify as aro was the fact that I just can't imagine myself in a romantic relationship. I don't even know what I'd do with a romantic partner. There's also the fact that I just don't really care that I'm not with someone in that way. To be honest, it was quite strange hearing that actively looking for romantic relationships was normal (apparently). I was quite oblivious to other people doing that sort of stuff during high school, to the point where I didn't know that people were doing it unless I was explicitly told. Seriously, I think I heard of about 3 or 4 different romantic relationships that occured during my entire school life which looking back seems to only represent a small pproportion of the actual number. I think what took me so ong to realise is that I didn't really have much pressure to do anything about my single status. The only person who pushed me towards a romantic relationship was my mum, and that was only her giving me simple suggestions infrequently. Most of my friends were single pretty much all through high school (or I just didn't notice they were in a romantic relationship). I think this whole questioning process took a few months. Something tells me that I started fully identifying as aro in September of last year although I'm unsure. I distinctly remember that I identified as aro before coming here. I mean if I didn't, I wouldn't have made an account when I did . After coming here though, it has just reinforced the fact that I'm aro in my mind. People actually make sense here. All you people are awesome and for once in my life I actually feel like I belong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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