Star Girl Posted May 4, 2017 Posted May 4, 2017 I'm curious... I have had only 2 ever (spaced five years apart) (I'm only 19). But reading people here and talking to one of my irl friends who also experiences squishes, it seems like it can vary a lot.
Shroomie Posted May 4, 2017 Posted May 4, 2017 I think I've had 3 (I'm 14). Mine were really close together- after the first one was over, it took about a month or so for my second one, (which I've had for about a year, and still have). Then my third one happened a few months after my second one started, then ended a couple months ago.
omitef Posted May 4, 2017 Posted May 4, 2017 19. I have had 13 squishes, since I was 12. On average, that is approximately 2 squishes per year. Here is my actual squish distribution. Spoiler *Squish Intensity on scale of 1~10, 10 being queerplatonic, 1 being I just want to get to know them better Age New Squish Count Squish Intensity* Squish Explanation 12 1 10 Person who I thought was my first "crush." I thought relationships = sexual friendship. I hadn't come out as aroace or trans. I thought I was lesbian. 13 1 10 My second "crush," who had internalised homophobia and bullied me for being "lesbian." Later became my first ex-girlfriend. 14 1 10 My third "crush," a straight girl. We had a sensually affectionate friendship for awhile, until I admitted I had a "crush" on her. 15 3 10 My fourth "crush," a bisexual closeted transdude, who actually was crushing on other people, and invited me to be on their backburner. I said no. We stopped being friends. 8 One of my fourth "crush's" actual crushes, a panromantic ace enby, who actually had a girlfriend at the time. I never approached them, due to their close proximity to my fourth "crush." Eventually they became queerplatonic friends with my fourth "crush." 2 Platonic infatuation towards a queer girl, who later ended up dating my fourth "crush." I didn't try to develop squishes on people related to my fourth "crush," I just went to a small school. 16 2 10 My fifth "crush," a girl who I seriously suspected was aro, but just didn't know about aromanticism. I tried to ask her out and got turned down. Then we stopped talking. Now we go to the same university. It's not awkward at all. 10 Alterous squish, a straight(?) girl who could never make up her feelings about me. We had an emotionally intense and unhealthy friendship that lasted for almost 3 years, that I finally ended a couple months ago. 17 1 10 My final "crush," who later became my first queerplatonic friend. She's ace, and helped me realise I was aro. 18 2 8/-10 My extremely straight neighbour who almost never stopped talking about her crush to me 10 My queer, non-binary roommate, who is now my ex-queerplatonic friend. 19 2 10/0 A queer, transmasculine relationship anarchist I met on Scruff, whose relationship style ultimately clashed with mine. But we're still friends, just not as close as we were when I was trying to become queerplatonic friends with him. 8/10 My second queerplatonic friend (that's in addition to my first), a queer transguy. So while writing this up I thought my intensity distribution would be a lot more nuanced but no, it turns out I really do just have lots of strong feelings for many people. I tend to experience one new squish at a time, although my alterous friendship happened while my first queerplatonic friendship was forming, and my two most recent squishes were happening at the same time for awhile, until I lost interest in the guy from Scruff.
hathat Posted May 4, 2017 Posted May 4, 2017 I'm 17 (18 in July) and I don't know if I've ever really had a squish... I can only think of one instance and that would be with by best friend at the moment. I consider him my best friend and I just hope we don't loose contact after high school I think it'd break my heart. It's probably the closest thing to a squish I've ever had.
sweetbitter Posted May 4, 2017 Posted May 4, 2017 I'm almost 17, right now I have 2 squishes, I'm not sure if I had squishes before, or they were crushes. But I have never felt such an intensive desire to be close friends with somebody as I do now.
SoulWolf Posted May 4, 2017 Posted May 4, 2017 Hmm, 12 at the most, and I'm not entirely sure if all of them were actually squishes or something else (I find this stuff confusing). Some of them lasted for many years. My first was my cousin, when I was like... I dunno... 5?
SamwiseLovesLife Posted May 11, 2017 Posted May 11, 2017 I've had 5, I'm 21 now. 2 pansexual cis females (1 at age 12-15 and a good friend, 1 age 14, I actually dated the second briefly) 1 homosexual cis male (age 13-15) 1 Straight? cis female (age 17-19, a friend) 1 homosexual trans male (age 19-20). The first 3 I thought were crushes as I had never experienced crushes and they were the strongest feelings I had felt about people. They were all very nice people who had traits I admired, self-confidence/creativity. I don't think their gender/sexuality is relevant but it seems interesting
Skittles87 Posted June 12, 2017 Posted June 12, 2017 I used to get lots of squishes when I was 12-14 - the same sort of age when my friends were always getting crushes, which is interesting. It makes me wonder if there is a hormonal basis to strong platonic attraction, or if it's to do with the social norm of crushes and wanting to experience that same kind of intense but usually harmless infatuation. As an adult (29) I rarely get squishes but I've learnt the hard way not to assume I'm too old for them!
Gingerplume Posted June 16, 2017 Posted June 16, 2017 At nearly 26, I don't think I've ever had a squish. It's still not fully clear to me how they differ from simply wanting to be friends with someone. It sounds to me like a squish is defined by a sensual attraction on top off the wish for platonic friendship, but without any romantic or sexual elements? I don't like being sensual/tactile with people without sexual attraction to them, so maybe that's why it's lost on me.
BionicPi Posted June 16, 2017 Posted June 16, 2017 1 hour ago, Gingerplume said: At nearly 26, I don't think I've ever had a squish. It's still not fully clear to me how they differ from simply wanting to be friends with someone. Most of the definitions I've seen refer to an intense desire to be friends with a specific person, so I took a squish as "I really wanna be friends with you" whereas normal wanting friendship would be "I really want a friend". Do other people see it this way or differently?
Holmbo Posted June 22, 2017 Posted June 22, 2017 I've never had any. They seem as weird as romantic crushes to me.
Momo Posted June 22, 2017 Posted June 22, 2017 As a romance neutral sex neutral aro ace I've had quite a few but I'm also the oldest to respond at 30. I couldn't count them, it's been a long time. My earliest would have been at around 16 though. I only came across the term aromantic in the last year or so though so I've been thinking they were crushes most of my life which has been... Confusing. I'm the sort of person who squishes pretty easily. If I feel like you're a good person then I've probably squished over you at least a little at some point. On 2017-6-17 at 3:37 AM, BionicPi said: On 2017-6-17 at 1:46 AM, Gingerplume said: At nearly 26, I don't think I've ever had a squish. It's still not fully clear to me how they differ from simply wanting to be friends with someone. Most of the definitions I've seen refer to an intense desire to be friends with a specific person, so I took a squish as "I really wanna be friends with you" whereas normal wanting friendship would be "I really want a friend". Do other people see it this way or differently? This is pretty much my take on the issue as well. An intense, directed desire to get to know a specific person.
hippiecat Posted July 11, 2017 Posted July 11, 2017 I'm 19 now and I think my squish count is 5? So not that frequently, but some of them have been intense
The Non-Month May Posted July 19, 2017 Posted July 19, 2017 On 5/4/2017 at 9:58 AM, Ice Queen said: I've had more than 25. Ditto I just... I love being friends with people! I got a squish on this guy because of his Pokemon hat, and my friends were so confused...
Ettina Posted July 19, 2017 Posted July 19, 2017 31 minutes ago, The Non-Month May said: Ditto I just... I love being friends with people! I got a squish on this guy because of his Pokemon hat, and my friends were so confused... That reminds me of Jughead. Didn't he squish on a girl because she was dressed up like a burger?
The Non-Month May Posted July 19, 2017 Posted July 19, 2017 5 minutes ago, Ettina said: That reminds me of Jughead. Didn't he squish on a girl because she was dressed up like a burger? I believe so we are such weird people, and it's great!
aro_elise Posted October 13, 2017 Posted October 13, 2017 idk, not too often. i have one now, on an internet friend; she's awesome. about a couple a year? i'm not sure when to define it as a squish, like when the desire for friendship becomes intense enough. and i have/have had them on several celebrities.
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