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About Momo

  • Rank
    Hopeless Aromantic
  • Birthday July 25

Personal Information

  • Name
  • Orientation
    Aromantic asexual
  • Gender
  • Pronouns
  • Location
    Melbourne, Australia
  • Occupation
    Info Tech

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1698 profile views
  1. Welcome! And no, the site isn’t going anywhere. It found a new home.
  2. For posterity, the forums were migrated to a new server and live on! Reports of Arocalypses death have been greatly exaggerated.
  3. I don't use any of these for romance, but I do use sex-neutral for my sexuality. I don't really have any feelings about romance in others. Even for as it relates to me, it's kind of strange. I don't feel bad about the romance itself, but I also know it doesn't work out so it's just kinda there.
  4. This is a pretty well known problem in a lot of spheres. The more standards/words/whatever exist, the more they tend to conflict and fight - in general. This is what ends up happening when you create a new standard and insist on it being the New Best Thing. Sadly, that is almost never the actual truth in any setting, least of all when you're talking about people's feelings and identity. --- So, the reason I brought up the real meaning of spectrum is because I feel it could help to solidify some of these terms. Instead of trying to define orientations in relation to each other, come up with some attributes that help split things. I don't want to try to start to come up with those attributes here and now, but with the right level of detail you start to get a picture of each individual person - an individual a/romantic spectrum. Then, comparing those spectra you will start to see patterns - the patterns that define the orientations and labels we use.
  5. Well, since this conversation seems to be ongoing... it's worth mentioning that most people seem to be misusing spectrum when what they mean (at least in their own head) is a gradient. Most people seem to be using spectrum to mean that there are two opposing things with some mixture in the middle, say aromantic <=> romantic with some various middle ground like greyro, etc. That's not what a spectrum actually is. A spectrum is a set of values from a range of possible values. I've seen this explained really well in autistic spaces and it may be worth taking some inspiration from. See for example this article: https://neuroclastic.com/2019/05/04/its-a-spectrum-doesnt-mean-what-you-think/ In this sense, an aro spectrum (or romantic spectrum, depending on how you want to phrase it), an ace spectrum (or sexuality spectrum, again depending on phrasing), etc all make sense. Including either the wider or narrower definition of an a-spectrum.
  6. Being agender is at least as similar to being aro as being ace is. For me, at least, I experience my agenderness almost exactly the same as I experience my aroness - a confusion about the concept in general. As opposed to my aceness, which I understand fully but just am not into. Honestly? I don't feel like this is up to us (agender people). If the term was created as a grouping of ace and aro experiences then we shouldn't come in and barge into that. If it was created as a way of grouping people who feel like some part of their identity is defined by a "no thanks" then we're already included. Personally, from my experience, the former is the truth not the latter.
  7. Yeeees, collect all the A's... together we shall rule the world! *ahem* Err, welcome to the forum from another quad-A.
  8. I am also curious about this. I hadn't heard of this as a thing before this thread.
  9. Echoing this. Paraphrasing is, at best, just adding an extra layer of bias on everything. At worst, it can completely rewrite and change the meaning of what was said.
  10. Hi there! Finding out later in life can definitely be hard. Personally, I'm 32 and only figured it out at around 29 - effectively ending a 7 year relationship on the spot. I'd definitely encourage you to join up to the forum fully and have a bit of a poke around. There's some good people here.
  11. Momo

    Banned Members

    WrenIsMyRealName has been banned for breaching section 2.f of the ToS:
  12. Looks like this is unavailable indefinitely due to incompatibilities. Sorry! But on the upside, it should only be Grammarly that's affected.
  13. You can now add your own images to posts. As of right now, the current limits are as follows: 300KB per post 10MB per user If you start running up against the per user limit, you can view where you have posted images previously and remove some of them from your previous posts by going to "My Attachments" in the drop down menu at the top right of the screen. Embedding images has always been a bit funky but should still work as well as it used to:
  14. In an effort to streamline the profile a little, reduce confusion and generally make things better for everyone the follow changes to profile fields have been made: The Romanticism profile field has been renamed to simply Orientation. The Sexuality field has been hidden from everyone but yourself so you can just copy and paste that information into the Orientation field if you wish. The Sexuality field will be removed completely in the coming weeks. Feel free to include as much or as little information as you feel relevant in the new Orientation field. This change has been made to make things easier. New people felt the need to include both when sometimes they weren't relevant and others didn't have the fields they needed to fully express themselves. I think this change puts everyone in a better position.
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