Do you want to have kids?

[eye]

I'm comparing the results from this poll to the one on the AVEN which is 51%No, 27%Yes and 21%Don't Know. Also feel free to discuss your answers.

Edited December 28, 2021 by Aroya

[nisse]

i don't want children, but i quite like them!

i'm incredibly, viscerally scared of pregnancy and birth, and i don't want 24/7 care of another human being. but i'm very fond of the children already in my life, and if any of my friends have kids i'm looking forward to being the cool uncle.

[aro_elise]

i would genuinely rather die lol

[Atlamillia Pixie]

If I could get a hysterectomy tomorrow, I would. I'm more scared of becoming a parent than dying. Screw that noise. 

[Arsenic]

Well, it is nice to see the typic videos of cute chlren doing x thing, but I would NEVER want to be a parent. I prefer to be an uncle. Anyway, I am studying to be a teacher, I will have enough kids with that. 

Edited December 28, 2021 by Arsenic

[Apex]

Definitely not for the foreseeable future. I don't dislike kids, but I have 0 experience with them and am just not ready to be a parent. Plus I totally lack that "omg!! so cute, can i hold them?" instinct that more parental people have with human babies. Oddly enough, a part of me likes the concept of being pregnant, but... I don't think I need more than that ?

If I did decide to become a mom, I'd rather adopt an older kid (like 8-13+?) rather than have one of my own.

[Just a Bear]

I'm on the fence as to whether I want to raise kids or not. if I would, it would probably be adopting or fostering older kids. 

[PeepsInTheChiliPot]

I definitely want to have kids. I don’t necessarily need to have a bio kid but it’s not out of the question. I definitely want to adopt though.

[-Veet-Voojagig]

I'm the 70.59% results for No.

[a star]

Absolutely not, for pretty much every reason: I'm sex-repulsed, I need my alone time, I don't know how to handle young kids, the prospect of being pregnant sounds like body horror, don't have sufficient social supports, people assuming that I'm in or want a romantic relationship makes me angry and children tend to be read as products of a romantic relationship, etc

[SirBeastling]

"Hell no" is my first thought. "Maybe" is my second. "But nah" is my last. :)

[MaxIsCosmic]

I might want to be a dad in the VERY late future. But I really don’t mind either way as long as I’m not called a mom.

Edited January 19, 2022 by Jackson_Glass

[Xander]

I don't want to be a ren at all. The thought of being completely responsible for a little human is not pleasant for me. Maybe I'll get to be around for my siblings' kids. Idk. 

[ImJustChillingHere]

A definite 'no'. I would rather jump off a bridge than get pregnant and have kids, and here are my reasons why:

• Taking care of babies (especially twins) is hard, and eats all of your time+energy (take it from me, the oldest sibling)
• The thought of actually having to conceive a child and giving birth is terrifying enough
• The world is messed up, it'll probably squash the purity of a child like it squashed mine
• The strain on my mental and physical health would be too much for me
• If I change my mind, I'll adopt, simple as that

Thank you for reading this, have a good day.

[Trans Aroace Girl]

Hard no for me. I see a lot of kids at work and I don't know how I could deal with some of them 24/7. I wouldn't be against babysitting sometimes, but that's as far as I'll go.

[alto]

No.  Just...no.

[cyancat]

i think i'd strangle them on account of how loud children can be so no. best not.

[Nagito]

No. First of all, I'm sure I wouldn't be a good parent and other thing it's easy for me to be overstimulated.

[aro_elise]

On 2/3/2022 at 12:46 PM, Aroace Sailor Scout said:

I wouldn't be against babysitting sometimes, but that's as far as I'll go.

i babysat for like 9 years.  just for the money.  hard pass on having to take care of them for more than a few hours at a time and it costing ME money (where would i get that money if i couldn't leave them to work?) and i can barely take care of myself, partly due to depression, which again, having kids would elevate to suicidal-level depression, so.  to say the least i find it odd when people still try to convince me to have kids.  like obviously it's disrespectful to me but more notably, it's cruel to the hypothetical kids.  i would be upset if my parents hadn't been so delighted and prepared emotionally and financially to have me, why would you want a kid to be born to a single person who's the opposite of that?

[Guest]

I think babies and kids are cute, adorable, funny and lovely and i love them(until they scream, misbehave or cry). But i don’t want any kids myself, i don’t have the mentality to take care of children. I would be the worst mother ever, cause i won’t take care of them and then i have to do things that they would like to do which i won’t. I let the family oriented couples do the job. 

5 hours ago, aro_elise said:

having kids would elevate to suicidal-level depression

Same here???

[Wesley]

I love children and adore working with them, however, I will never birth a child, because I am asexual and s3x repulsed, but I do desire to raise children or at least have an occupation that requires me to work with kids. I will most likely adopt or foster children once I am of age, and mentally and financially stable enough for children. :)

[atrocious_ar0mantic]

I don’t personally want my own kids. I like kids and working with them, but I don’t want to be involved with them 24/7. I’d be much more content working in a daycare, as a teacher- even being a godparent or auncle to a kid. But I don’t want one in my living space all the time- just not my vibe. 

[lovelyleaf]

no.

[Nix]

No I don’t. I love working with children aged 7-12 and how they view the world. And I love my 4 year old cousin, but I am exhausted if I have to spend more then a few hours around him or similary aged children. I find baby’s to be loud and not cute at all.

Funny thing is, it took me almost 30 years to realise I am aroace, but I have always known I don’t want children. When my friends and I played ‘family’ as small children I never wanted to be the mom. And when we played this game where you blow on a dandelion and count how many seeds are left (because that was how many children you would get) I would make absolutely sure no seeds would be left. 

[Acecream]

I don‘t want kids. It‘s not that I don‘t like them (I find kids very cute and very funny), but I don‘t really know how to act close to them and I hate being alone with kids bc it makes me REALLY uncomfortable. So I could never be a single-parenting person and as I don‘t want to get in a relationship shared–parenting is not an option (and I also do not want it bc it seems even more complicated to figure out the way you both are fine with to raise your child)

Having kids is just not in my living plan of being aroace

actually, it was the main reason I came out to my mum; to stop her talking about my future with kids. 
 

Cn hrt pregnancy

since I know that I am nonbinary and that I want to do HRT, the topic is coming up again. My mum is starting to talk about „you will use your ability to get kids why are do you want to go on HRT“

and I’m like, mum, I‘m f***ing aro, having kids is NOT in my future. And my parents are like „yah, but you don‘t always PLAN to get kids it just happens“ and then I‘m reminding them about my aceness and that even if it‘s not impossible for me to get pregnant it‘s unlikely that it ‚just happens‘ and then they continue to tell me that I still could have kids in alternative forms of living OK BUT WHY THE HELL TO YOU THINK THAT I SHOULD BE THE PERSON WHO GETS PREGNANT THEN?????? 

in the end I said something like „some trans* persons who are on hrt can still get own kids and I could also do a egg retrieval and stuff (no I don‘t think I’m going to do this) and then the discourse stops…

but it sucks that my parents still have this picture of me with kids in their head

and also that they still seem to have a very amatonormative picture of my future (living together with anothers in a way you can somehow read as loveless partnership)