roboticanary

2002

true, when I was a student I was probably about 70% pasta tpbm enjoys listening to podcasts

false. I am not comfortable bringing that up yet. TPBM drinks a lot of tea

sleepy

Not sure but I suspect those foods are kind of meant to be parallels with ace symbols. so pizza goes with garlic bread.

@MulticulturalFarmer, good to see someone else having that sort of response. I definitely relate to wanting to learn from people interested in science. As for your question, probably. when I was young I had a bit of mental health treatment for what at the time was considered my anger management issues. I now know one of them thought I was likely on the autism spectrum but unfortunately school mental health where I was was a poorly funded mess. As I got older and stopped getting in to so many fights I stopped seeing them and basically forgot about the whole you might be autistic thing. As far as school was concerned if I wasnt beating people up I must be fine. From around the time I started considering my aromanticism I have also been finding that more and more of the things I do fit with what I hear from autistic people. So I suspect I am but I have never went through any formal diagnosis.

hi Xander cool that you have a good idea of your identity. hope you find this place useful. Also a coffee enthusiast who loves sleeping, same here though I'm not sure I'm too happy with the situation.

Not sure what you should do but I agree with your idea of messaging him to explain why you have been quiet. I dont think that is likely to piss him off and if it does then what would not giving him an explanation do. You know your situation best but to back you up, that sounds a sensible idea. could be, that seems reasonable and would be a possible explanation for your discomfort over this.

cool, just had a look at the account and you are doing some cool stuff there

welcome You seem pretty chill about being aro, thats cool. as for what now, no idea, how about ice cream

hi, welcome good to hear someone else working through that difficulty from your allosexuality being influenced by aromanticism, that took me a while too. any chance you could give a link to that post, it sounds really interesting.

that is a fair worry. however I suspect that the sort of person who believes these identities are just a phase are not going to be disuaded even if you did keep the same label all your life

Black Betty

You do not have to be perfectly comfortable with your identity to choose a label. it is clear that you are not entirely sure whether aro or greyromantic fit you best, so do not be worried to pick either one. remember it could be that you are greyromantic and those concerns you have about offending greyros would apply to aros. Anyone who is offended at you choosing an identity that may fit you then switching to one which does is, in my opinion, being silly. it reduces the ability of someone to find themself as they could only experiment with an identity after they are basically certain it was made for them, and that makes working these things out so more difficult.

sounds like a good idea. I have a few friends who I am happy to talk about my other friends with, and the only way that conversation will ever come up is if I ask them about their friends. it is frustrating that very few people seem interested in asking people how their friends are doing. I get the dificulty of asking people about their friends in these times but certainly as the year goes on it is something I would recommend trying out more.

I remember hearing a suggestion for manticores, just because aro-manticore sounds right. That would be my vote, however I would want them to look less derp than the medieval pictures of them.

hi good to see you joining in. Agree with you on knowing who you are, that makes such a difference to your mindset.

hi good to see you are working things out, I totally relate to that thing of parents getting worried, its our lives to live but it does feel like they think I am doing something wrong. hope things go well for you with them.

I'm not sure if I have, for me the concept is really tied up with my neurology and getting obsessions. I occasionally will find someone I really want to befriend and will go down a very intense rush to know them, like. I want to learn everything about your interests and impress you with what you enjoy and know all the things you like and complain about the things you hate and this has to stop this has to stop. At that point I have to calm myself down and be like, lets just talk calm and develop a friendship alright. I'm not sure if it fits the idea of a squish or is just friendship plus my brain.

A few thoughts It is hard to disentangle whether you want a romantic relationship due to desiring romance or because strong societal pressures push you towards one or make you feel unworthy if you are not in one. Also it might be that a lot of your sadness from that relationship you talk about is tied up in the way they turned you down. If I wanted to be around some one or respected by them and they told me they asked me out out of pity I would be very unhappy. working out what sort of relationship you would or would not be interested in is the thing I think would be helpful here. Before I heard about aromanticism there was friends and lovers and casual screws, pick one. that was about all I knew, looking back I see that some of my frustration has been because I wanted a style of companionship that simply did not fit into those neat boxes.None of us can take away your confusion from just seeing a couple of comments but this is the advice I think would be most helpful, have a long think about what you actually wanted from that person and see if it fits with some more aro fitting concepts like qprs or found family as guest suggests. Not feeling that apparent butterflies feeling seems to be something common to a lot of aros, myself included. lastly that 85 percent of the time thing sounds wrong, like romance version of the every 6 seconds nonsense. not sure where you heard that but there has to be some qualification to that because it is just a daft number. 15% left to deal with eating, sleeping, all hygene, freinds and family, work, every hobby you have, cats, all education and just the thinking you need to do to make it through the day. I bet that stat is bollocks.

Hi, welcome As Erederyn said, there are many people using this site as a way of working out their identity, you are absolutely welcome using this site to figure yourself out. What you say about being relieved at not having to deal with romance really strikes a chord with me. That feeling, the weight off my chest was one of the first things that made me think I might be aro. Hope you find this a good place to work out your identity.

Sounds good to me, out of the current suggestions that is the one I am most interested in discussing. It works for me

Not keeping people around. People I know finding lovers and rarely seeing me again, simply because they will value that romance far higher than any friendship (even if it is a train wreck). A close second would be being judged for desiring sex without romance, I realise that even if I treat those I have sex with with respect and good friendship I will still be seen as taking advantage.

Hi @karo, did you get enough responses for what you want? do you have a link to the results or what you did with them? It would be interesting to see what responses you got out of this.