Jump to content

How do you feel about pet-names?


Recommended Posts

I'm curious to know how my fellow aromantics feel about the use of pet-names/affectionate nicknames in a platonic relationship (not necessarily a QPR, but you can interpret that in any way you wish).

In my experience it's been a bit awkward for me to comfortably call my close friends 'babe' or say I love you with out being worried about implying feelings that I absolutely do not have.

Although for me personally when I have been able to make it clear that the names come from a place of genuine admiration versus hinting, it feels natural and really nice.

I know this is probably different for everyone, so what is it like for you?

Edited by cerimonials
Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 minutes ago, cerimonials said:

I'm curious to know how my fellow aromantics feel about the use of pet-names/affectionate nicknames in a platonic relationship.

In my experience it's been a bit awkward for me to comfortably call my close friends 'babe' or say I love you with out being worried about implying feelings that I absolutely do not have.

Although for me personally when I have been able to make it clear that the names come from a place of genuine admiration versus hinting, it feels natural and really nice.

I know this is probably different for everyone, so what is it like for you?

I don't think I'd enjoy doing that very much, if it was with a friend of the same gender that would just be ever more proof to clueless people that I would somehow be gay. Besides that just sounds weird, my family doesn't even do pet names, we just take random embarrassing names out of inside jokes and call each other that occasionally. It's only in the family though. XD

  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I like ‘em. Everyone can be babe to me and that don’t have to mean anything. If someone gets all no homo about it then they’re not someone I’d want as a friend anyway lol. 
Of course, if someone’s genuinely uncomfortable with pet names, I’ll respect that. But just because I call someone something doesn’t mean I’m interested in them, especially since I’m Latina and queer so I’m just inclined towards pet names anyway 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

25 minutes ago, Jot-Aro Kujo said:

I like ‘em. Everyone can be babe to me and that don’t have to mean anything. If someone gets all no homo about it then they’re not someone I’d want as a friend anyway lol. 
Of course, if someone’s genuinely uncomfortable with pet names, I’ll respect that. But just because I call someone something doesn’t mean I’m interested in them, especially since I’m Latina and queer so I’m just inclined towards pet names anyway 

No that's mostly just random other people, I'll keep my friends firmly in the friend area and if it expands platonically, then awesome! :D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

9 minutes ago, HelloThere said:

No that's mostly just random other people, I'll keep my friends firmly in the friend area and if it expands platonically, then awesome! :D

Huh? I'm confused what you're talking about

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I kind of like pet-names, especially strange ones that me and my friends use that are uniquely for each other (ex: starlight, starshine, even the name gremlin, etc). Sometimes it is kind of hard for me to use certain pet-names like "hon," "sweetheart," or the rare use of "babe" without feeling like I implied something that isn't there, but saying "I love you" comes quite easily to me around friends, as long as it is made known that it's not meant romantically first.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

23 minutes ago, The Newest Fabled Creature said:

I kind of like pet-names, especially strange ones that me and my friends use that are uniquely for each other (ex: starlight, starshine, even the name gremlin, etc). Sometimes it is kind of hard for me to use certain pet-names like "hon," "sweetheart," or the rare use of "babe" without feeling like I implied something that isn't there, but saying "I love you" comes quite easily to me around friends, as long as it is made known that it's not meant romantically first.

That’s honestly something that none of my friends have done. 

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, HelloThere said:

Random people would call me gay for having pet names with friends.

 I can also relate to this. I would love to call my friends pet-names, but it can easily translate to something more than friendly :,)

Maybe I'm being paranoid about how people may interpret certain acts, but I'd still rather avoid the situation instead of awkwardly going "... But no romo!"

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I understand the appeal, but they are not for me. They just make me feel weird for no reason, and I've gone through a lot of "Oh are you two dating" just because I have a lot of female friends, I don't want that to escalate 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I find most pet names quite disappointing.

When I was young there was a friend of my mums who would refer to pretty much everyone as 'me duck' or 'duck'. (For those outside the UK, this is a fairly common pet name used by people in the North of England and I haven't a clue why)

Honestly no pet name can come close to being as good as being called duck.

 

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

It depends on who's using them. I'm fine with my friends using them rather rarely and jokingly, but I don't think it's something I'd want anyone to call me on a daily basis. However I can't stand my family calling me pet-names, no matter whether they're serious about it or not. It just makes me feel uncomfortable.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 1 month later...
  • 2 weeks later...
  • 5 months later...

I don't feel comfortable when anyone I'm not dating in a romantic way uses pet names for me, so I just ask they use my name. I'm currently in a QPR and we call each other our squish but outside of that I'm not into those cute pet names others use. I know she likes them but I don't like them even if she uses them. That's just me though.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I generally feel similar to when I'm insulted and thus tend to ignore them, but undue pet-names in formal situations can be even more cringe. Otherwise the general rule is: If we ain't even close, don't pet-name me, otherwise I may use thou as something to sharpen my claws on. 😾 I think it's more due to those around me being Chuck-awful at it, as opposed to my tolerance.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I’m not comfortable with the use of pet names (wthr it’s sm1 else using them 4 or vise versa). In gen I just use ppls names or nicks, the farthest I would prob go is using a diff nick if sm1 is comfortable, but I’ve never had the need to.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...

Honestly, I don't like em, I have this one guy I'm friends with and he always calls me "cupcake" for fun, but my anxious ass is way too scared to tell him I don't like it, so here I am lmao

I feel like that is at least kinda toed to my aromanticism because it gives me these romantic vibes that I don't really like tbh. I'm romance-neutral, but if people show active romantic interest in me I tend to get repulsed.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...