The Newest Fabled Creature

Yeah, it's kind of horrible that people are taught that relationships and especially those of the romantic kind are meant to solve your unhappiness, or are the answer to ~everything~ Oh, you're constantly sad and don't know the exact cause? Go find a partner! You don't know what to do now hobby-wise, or you have spent all of your energy on so many interests? Time to try dating :D And maybe, sometimes, finding a partner can help someone, but the toxic ideology that someone else's mere existence is supposed to remedy everything "wrong" with you is so horrible.

That sounds very concerning (him wanting to move to your country). And it could be that he did delusion himself into thinking that maybe you were playing "hard to get" or he had a "I can fix them" mentality; both equally infuriating ways of thinking when the person is dead serious.

I don't know if anyone here knows the music artist/screamer songwriter Stoj Snak, but one song I associate with aro-ness is "State of Mine." It's very good, has this feeling that reaches my soul. Some other songs I suggest aren't necessarily "aro feeling" to me but just good songs, is "Forgotten Phone" ( a song he submitted and had entered into a game where you find a lost phone and find out that the og owner was a trans girl), and "Fuck!" (which is basically a song he wrote for his support of the LGBTQ+ community. It is a song that says 'people should be able to sleep with whoever they want' and I know that those types of songs could be a turn off for some, which is understandable, but it's overall a catchy song).

That certainly sounds frustrating. Especially so when you try to tell the other that you can't feel the same or don't want anything serious, but then they start liking you like that anyway. I know that alloros can't control that I guess, but at least know that that's when you may have to stop if feelings start forming still.

Oh no, that sounds like a tricky and exhausting situation. Despite all of the maybes, I think you did the best you could to convey that you just didn't want that type of relationship and couldn't feel the same way. Thank you for the playlist too!

Thank you so much! I've been trying to find as many songs that are aro-coded, or that the aro community resonates with, or were made by aro people, so that I could add them to a big playlist on Spotify to llsten to! And for any aros/aro-specs, or alloaces, or romance-diverse / amatonormative-aware alloroallos could listen to em', if they wanted to as well.

Hey! I was wondering if you could share your songs, or let me know where to listen to your songs, since I'd like to check em' out!

I don't always go through the conscious process of identifying as a 'loveless aro' (hence it not being on my orientation), but I am still loveless, especially when it comes to rejecting the expectations and assumptions of alloromanticism and romance in society, and with whoever I am now as a person, I am one who can not feel the type of love that alloromantics believe to be the only existing form of it, and I don't need to redeem who I am by saying I love my friends/family/pets/interests/etc. I also identify as such when it comes to just owning my aro identity in general, and want to reclaim the "robot" or "soulless" stereotype that often affects the aspec community. I do share sentiments with loveloose and lovequeer a lot, but I just say I'm loveless besides.

I can see how aros who never had crushes before, don't want a partnership, and may or may not be romance repulsed, can be depicted more in media, leaving aros who experience romantic attraction in some ways, or have teritary attractions, or want partnerships, or have a lesser represented view on romance, in the shadows. That's not the fault of end-spec aros (not saying that anyone stated that here though), and it's still amazing they get representation (when our community ever does) since end-spec aros, or "absolute" aros still get a lot of shit like the rest of us, even when the discrimination directed at us is nuanced based on our own personal identities. TLDR: having rep of end-spec aros is amazing, but granted there's lesser rep of aro-specs, not to the fault of end-specs.

Holy shit this actually explains how I ship characters, too! I do participate in the shipping sides of fandoms more often than not and usually the romantic ones, too - it's actually rare for me to have a qpr ship, idk why truly; but with the ways of shipping, it can definitely be frustrating to no end. And there's times where I take full on breaks and go through periods of, how should I say it, shipping anarchy.

I think it'd be cute!

I kind of get that. Not that I've thought my allosexuality is predatory, but often times I feel like I shouldn't think about it and most often than not I actually don't think about my sexuality at all. Maybe this has to do with the fact that my sexuality feels "normal" to me now, and is the "eldest" identity I've realized about myself, but, I'm wondering if me not thinking about it and even forgetting I can experience sexual attraction has to do with something else, too.

Not to dilute this topic with comics, but this would probably have to be my favorite LGBallT comic despite not being genderfluid myself (sorry for how big it is ^^" )

This picture represents the earth shattering moment of when you realize you're queer. All of the pieces are in place, the puzzle has been formed, and yet you feel the rug ripped from under you, your mind collapses into fragmented thoughts of "how?'' when you take a good hard look at what should've been "obvious."

Q: What are the best go-to things to have for a fun night ;) A: Dandelions and grass

I tried to have my other pin be the mspec flag, but I don't know if I picked the right one 😅 And I also only put they/it as my preferred pronouns because I like them more than he/him, though I don't mind being referred to with he/him if someone "had" to use binary pronouns for me

I typically listen to any type of genre of music normally, but my comfort music tends to be a set mix, which is usually old love songs (Frank Sinatra, Jack Hylton, Paul Anka, and so much more), indie Disco (the only artist I know to be in this genre is Lando Burch), and some peaceful country (Glenn Campbell, John Denver, etc). I won't share the love songs I like nor country songs with actual soul put into them, because many of us have already heard them before, but I'll share my ultimate favorite Lando Burch music: "Dancing Shoes" - https://youtu.be/s6ThzLWRAjg "Summerfruit (feat. Leila XY)" - https://youtu.be/mX-A0wH-wH8 "Never Knew" - https://youtu.be/VjraAa0M6L8 "Rendezvous (feat. Adiel Mitchell)" - https://youtu.be/mSu-Dej8maE "Such a Happy Feelin'" - https://youtu.be/taB17t7OzBI His music sounds like it be a soundtrack to some 70s or 80s movie, I love it

Thank you for the clarification! I knew it was a counter-culture with philosophy and political views, but I tend to forget how people strive to stay entwined with the culture and how much more important it is to them. I don't have the words for how - intriguing I guess, though that's not necessarily the right word I should use, that the culture is to me, but I can find it fascinating, relatable in ways, and understand why it's very important and yet still not be able to actually commit unless I was ready to and further learned the implications. I guess I should've specified I'd like to try certain aspects of punk, but now I know that I shouldn't just call myself punk for that /gen

I would say I namely have a "Norm Core" aesthetic I usually literally look like this (not ashamed): Apologies for how big the picture is, but I've been trying to dabble more into the androgynous side of things (mixing an overtly masculine shirt with women's jeans, or a femme top with pants made for men in small, or a button up with a skirt etc) and have been wanting to dabble/play with the aesthetics such as Arcadecore, Alternative, Punk aspects, and Academia - if I'm able to get around to doing any of that.

That's a good way to go about it! It's one way that's kind of helped me in overcoming most of the perceptions others may have of me and my friends, by telling the friends I have that are very affectionate if I could try showing them affection like that too, or discussing with my friends who aren't overtly affectionate what it is I mean when I tell them I love them or want to hang out with them in a way that seems "romantic"; like just the two of us going to the movies or to a restaurant for example. It's necessarily perfect and I believe there could be better ways, but it's a start. Exactly!

I get that. My complete lack of interest in being with someone romantically, kind of lowered any intentions I could have with someone sexually.

It is a saying that I don't see a lot anywhere and that stuck with me because of how it isn't said that much.

Don't know if you ever heard the saying of someone knowing the outline or body of their partner, but I just stating that I would only want my bed to "remember" that lol

Had an aro moment where I thought to myself, "The only thing that I want to romantically remember the outline of my body, is my bed."

One could identify as aro/aro-spec because of the problems in interpreting their own emotions from being autistic, and then yet again, one could identify as aro/aro-spec and just happen to also be autistic, or they could not identify as aro/aro-spec besides. I mean - I have autism and although I know that realistically it could play a role in how I process my own emotions, it doesn't feel like it's tied into my aromanticism anyway since it feels like my neurodivergency is more in relation to how I process things mentally rather than emotionally. But for some aros, that is the reality for them in identifying as such because of their neurodivergency and they're just as valid.