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How much do you talk about aromanticism or being aro in everyday life?


Holmbo
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sometimes, like if it's relevant, like if we're talking about dating and i contribute my attitude or experience, i might follow it up with "'cause, you know."   the implied end of the sentence being "i'm aro, so ?‍♀️".  like my roommate was talking about the concept of eventually getting bored with a partner and i said "i'd get bored with them in like a month, but, you know."  and if i say something like that around someone who doesn't know, i might tell them.  occasionally with my best friend i'll talk about deeper stuff like my fear of my friends not having time/love for me when they get married or whatever.  sometimes people will ask me questions, like my best friend asked me to help her understand demisexuality because she thought my understanding of sexual and romantic orientation would make for a good answer, and i kind of explained the ace and aro spectrums.  but you know, there's only so much of the topic you can really talk about with allos and understand each other, especially without some preliminary lesson.  like a lot of our discussions here, i wouldn't have with anyone else.  

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The only time aromantism comes up outside Arocalypse is when my other GSRM/ LGTBQIA+ friends and we start talking about our experiences or sometimes my straight friends will ask a question about it, but that's not often and they are respectful about it so I don't mind answering. Since I'm only out to about 7/8 people, all of which are my friends, it does not come up often. 

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I haven't been aware of my aro-ness long enough to really get into conversations around it with my irl friends. Particularly because I'm still under almost complete social isolation outside of the internet for health/safety reasons. (although granted, I have had the "well, I'm not into relationships/dating" sort of half-conversations with them occasionally before, but I didn't have words for what I was describing at the time)

Weirdly, I have had quite a few "well, aro..." sort of conversations with my mother lately? I've not had a full definition conversation with her, but since I get at least some of my aro traits from her and we've always been close, whenever the baffling topics of romance (and sex, since I'm ace too) come up it just ends up happening. 

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In the physical world, not much.  Those who know me already get it; it usually doesn't come up otherwise.

Online I read romantic stories & participate in discussions where I may say that I identify with a character who's aro, ace or nonbinary when someone thinks it's unrealistic.  Also when someone is shipping unattached characters I might mention that not everyone needs a partner.

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I've talked about it very briefly with one of my friends (whom I suspect is ace aro, since he says he doesn't want a romantic/sexual relationship), and he understands my point of view. He's also autistic, like myself, and we've known each other since preschool.

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In day to day life, pretty much never. I may occasionally say "I have no interest/experience in relationships" to preface a comment on other people's relationships when asked for advise. I also have an aroace friend who I occasionally share an aro themed comment or joke with, but I have not actually had a discussion with them about it since the first "hey we're in the same 'aromantic asexuals' facebook group! That's why you looked familiar when we first met." "oh hey what are the chances, this is like meeting a unicorn" exchange.

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  • 2 weeks later...

I'm open to talk about if if people ask if I want to date or be in relationships again. I've been out queer for years this is a newer realization but I have no issues being open about it. 

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I haven’t talked about it much but, yesterday at work some coworkers and I were talking about weddings and marriage and I said I sometimes thought about my wedding but only the party aspect of it because I don’t plan on getting married. One of them said I’d find someone and I said that’s not really what I want. I didn’t use the word aromantic because I didn’t feel like discussing all that but I just said I wasn’t interested in relationships. She seemed a little confused but said that’s fine and I should do whatever makes me happy. 

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On 10/2/2020 at 8:22 PM, Lyss123 said:

I kinda wish I had the opportunity to talk about aro issues but I need to come out the closet first ?

Maybe you can talk about other "hypothetical people" who might not desire romance ?

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  • 3 weeks later...

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