Jump to content

Do you feel more Aro or Ace?


Dominus Temporis
 Share

Recommended Posts

Here is a question for all my fellow aroaces out there: do you feel more aro or ace? Which part of your orientation takes up the most space? Which do you think the most about? Which do you struggle with the most? Which do you feel the most discrimination because of? 

I've personally spent a lot more time thinking about my asexuality, but I think that's mainly due to the fact that aromanticism is even more invisible than asexuality. And to be honest, I often have a really hard time relating to alloromantic aces; finding a partner seems to be a big part of their lives. 

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I feel more aro. It just makes sense to me.My asexuality is still something i question because i'm kinda young so i'm just taking it day by day and if today i'm ace then today i'm ace and if for some odd reason i'm not tomorrow then i'll figure it out.I hate the idea of kissing so anything else is even worse.i haven't really felt discrimination yet but being in school where dating is "important" or whatever is horrible.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I feel more ace. I'm more secure in my asexuality, but I'm also secure in my aromanticism. I'm indifferent about romantic acts, while I'm sex-repulsed. I'd never consider doing it or anything of that sort. I'm generally fine with "romance-coded" acts of affection like hand holding and hugs, which does confuse people when I tell them that I'm aroace, or that I'm not in a relationship with the person I'm being affectionate with. Personally, I don't see most "romantic" acts as romantic, I'm fine with them generally. Such as holding someone's hand, as I don't see how something as simple as that is reserved for romance.

I love physical affection like hugs and other stuff like that, but overtly romantic acts like kissing makes me very uncomfortable. I don't want to be in a romantic or sexual relationship with anyone, but if I had to choose, I think I'm more asexual than aromantic.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Aro for sure. I'm less certain of my asexual identity, though I'm still pretty content with it. I like the ace flag cuz it has my favorite color (purple), but I am reminded so much more of how aromantic I am being around alloromantics all the time..... being asked if I have a significant other or if I want one, people talking about the kind of person they're attracted to, etc. I mean, sex comes up sometimes, but mostly people seem to talk about the romantic side of things.

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Aro for me too. I’m very ace as well, but being aro has a much more visible effect on my life.

On 8/3/2022 at 10:59 PM, Dominus Temporis said:

And to be honest, I often have a really hard time relating to alloromantic aces; finding a partner seems to be a big part of their lives. 

Also why I am active on this site and not on AVEN.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

i feel more ace for sure, because romance is something so similar to friendship in my eyes that it gives me doubt as to whether i truly experience romance or not

sexuality im more sure about because never in my whole life have i felt an urge to f*ck ppl, romance is an iffy thing bc highschool makes everyone romance obsessed and the urge to fit in has never been higher, so there's a lot of self-doubt that goes there

3 hours ago, Nix said:

Also why I am active on this site and not on AVEN.

tbh i feel AVEN is more active as a community than here, im mostly only here on my pc where AVEN has been blocked on a level i can't figure out how to unblock

there's aroace spaces on AVEN if you know where to look

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Aro for me too.

I feel a bit more connected with my ace identity now that I visited some ace forums, but exclusively as an aroace sense. I mean, if I had to describe my identity, I can say I'm aro, I can say I'm aroace, but I don't think I would use the word "ace" alone except when answering something that is solely about sex or asexuals. I don't know if you see what I mean ?

Also I feel that being aro influence my life more, when it comes to relationships, how it is view and what struggles it creates, etc.

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

To me, these are just two sides of the same coin. I am ace the same way I am aro, so to me, feels like both these identities come from the same internal source. In that way I don't feel like I am more of one than the other.

Still, when I found that there was something called 'aromantic' as separate from 'asexual' (generally when people talk about sexuality, the romantic identity is included) I was confused about romantic identity for a bit x) Asexuality was easier to figure out, not wanting to have sex is a pretty straight forward concept. Romantic attraction is harder to define for someone who hasn't felt it. But it is also so that my experience is pretty far removed from an alloromantic ace, so in that way, the aromanticism plays a larger role. But again, internally they are kind of one pool for me.

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I identify more strongly with aromanticism than asexuality. I feel like it effects my life more than asexuality. Similar to what nonmerci said, I'd describe myself as "aro" or "aroace", but probably not just "ace". I think that's partially because if I were to tell someone I was just ace, they'd probably assume I was allo. Plus I'm still (sorta??) questioning my sexual orientation.

Saw this same question on Aven based on this one, and most people there felt more ace than aro, which makes sense

Link to comment
Share on other sites

10 minutes ago, Pyr said:

I identify more strongly with aromanticism than asexuality. I feel like it effects my life more than asexuality. Similar to what nonmerci said, I'd describe myself as "aro" or "aroace", but probably not just "ace". I think that's partially because if I were to tell someone I was just ace, they'd probably assume I was allo. Plus I'm still (sorta??) questioning my sexual orientation.

Saw this same question on Aven based on this one, and most people there felt more ace than aro, which makes sense

Yes, I asked the question on Aven as well, and it's not surprising that most people on here feel more aro than ace, and that the folks on Aven feel more ace than aro.

I personally feel like they are two sides of the same coin. I suppose aromanticism makes asexuality more visible as well - if someone who is asexual is in a relationship, people will just assume they're not asexual. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...