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Neon

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  • Name
    Neon
  • Orientation
    Aroace
  • Gender
    Genderfluid
  • Pronouns
    They/She/He
  • Location
    Elsewhere

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  1. The doubt goes away with time. You have to consider the doubts, and go through why you know they are wrong. Eventually, they'll slow down, and when they do show up, they won't make an impact. I would suggest writing down somewhere all the reasons you know you're aro. That way when the doubts say the same thing they said 2 months ago, you already have exactly why they were wrong and continue to be wrong. Also, remember, labels and identity are fluid. You don't need to fit a dictionary definition to find meaning in the aromantic label and use it.
  2. The "little" part just refers to the whole rest of the spectrum. You can see a non-exhaustive list here. So yeah, if someone felt romantic attraction rarely, they could absolutely refer to themself as "aromantic" and be entirely correct. Overall, if the "aromantic" label helps you define yourself, then use it. The definition is better used as a guide than a rule.
  3. While my identities aren't entirely separate, they are very distinct and I absolutely favor my aro one over my ace one. Not feeling romantic attraction is just more impactful and relevant to how I live my life than not feeling sexual attraction. And yet almost everyone I'm out to irl describes me as "asexual" without even mentioning that I'm aromantic too.
  4. GSA = Gay-Straight Alliance. It's essentially just an after-school club for gay people. Many have started moving away from that acronym though. I don't have a good suggestion if you aren't in school because that's where I help out lol. Maybe a local queer organization is taking volunteers though?
  5. If you are still in school and you have a GSA or similar, you can talk about hosting an info session through them. It's probably too late to do so this year, but there's always next year.
  6. For aro vibes specifically: Romance is Boring - Los Campesinos! The Record Player Song - Daisy the Great Girlfriend is Better - Talking Heads For general songs about friendship instead of romance: Don't Go Away - The Beths Happy New Year - Let's Eat Grandma Two Ribbons - Let's Eat Grandma Brooklyn - Katie Malco
  7. First off, yeah, they were rude. And, yes, your initial response, "that's not funny" was very good. You didn't overreact at all. That being said, your expression of being upset should have ended after the initial conversation. Giving her the cold shoulder all night for an issue you've already resolved is also rude (though not on the same level imo), and just creates a new problem. If you couldn't not do that, which is fair, you should have excused yourself with something along the lines of "I'm not mad anymore, but I need some time to cool down".
  8. I just got a notification for this comment and holy crap it's fascinating how much my outlook on relationships has changed. Back then I was terrified to admit I was aroace to myself. Now I think I've really grown into myself and my identity. I can talk about relationships far more positively and with more nuance than I could when I hadn't yet accepted myself.
  9. When objectively toxic relationships are portrayed as super romantic. I read a book once where the love interest literally committed genocide because he was sad the MC died (it's kinda convoluted, she died and got brought back essentially) and I couldn't finish the series it was so awful.
  10. I play piano and I find it delightfully ironic that my favorite era to play from is the Romantic Era.
  11. What happened with me is that my sibling sent me a fanfiction that causually mentioned aromanticism without defining it and started trying really hard to shove all the thoughts I had since I was 12 and heard about asexuality (thinking it included romantic attraction). That lasted until my mom had a surgery (it went very well, she's fine) and I finally looked up aromanticism because that was slightly less stressful. Lots of uncomfortable and scary feelings later, here I am, with my giant aro flag in my room.
  12. Like @hemogoblin said, you seem burned out and really down on yourself for something that is far from life-or-death, not remotely lazy. The reason you need a break is to get the stuff done. Take it from someone who's been there, the only way you are going to start doing it again is if you take a real step back, not one where you still peak around the corner at it every 5 minutes. If we can't convince you that you aren't being lazy (you aren't), then you still deserve a break. Your academics should never come at the expense of your mental health and sense of self worth. No matter what.
  13. Is there any way to know if a user report went through/what the results are? It's not that important, but I'm curious and I've never reported someone before today.

    1. DeltaAro

      DeltaAro

      I don't think so. I've only reported gambling spam, and those posts were just gone after a few days.

    2. Neon

      Neon

      That's what I figured, I was just really curious. IDK why, I just like to know processes sometimes for no good reason.

    3. roboticanary

      roboticanary

      ask me or one of the mods works, we should be able to at least let you know what happened. sometimes we send messages in the report itself which the reporter should be able to see. but often, especially if obvious spam, we dont (or its me forgetting, that can happen)

  14. You aren't being lazy. And there is nothing wrong with you. Please remember that school does not define you. It's one aspect of one part of your life. In 10 years anyone asking you how you did in high school or college will be laughed out of the room. My advice right now is to put down the homework and set aside your worries about it and go do something with the sole intention of relaxing for a couple hours. Whatever that means for you. Go do it. School is not allowed in that time, so you aren't procrastinating. It's not an easy task but it's helped me when I fall into similar ruts. Finally, a lot of what you said is very concerning. Do you have someone you can talk to about these feelings IRL? If you do, please contact them, I think it's a safe bet they can help more than we can.
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