BlueMycena Posted July 5, 2023 Share Posted July 5, 2023 I asked this question on reddit, but I thought this might be a better place to share my worries. I can not stand straight romance in media, that sh*t makes me want to gag, but I do enjoy same sex romance in literature and media. A lot of the time I feel like a bad Aro for liking Sapphic and Achillean romance in media, like I’m feeding into amatonormativity by liking romance in media at all. Am I crazy for feeling this? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HelloThere Posted July 5, 2023 Share Posted July 5, 2023 Nope, liking romance in the media, no matter the kind is totally fine. It’s not feeding into amatanormativity, in fact it’s breaking the romance-repulsed stereotype. It’s entirely based off of attraction to people romantically, not on if you like that stuff, though often it’s a sign. 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jot-Aro Kujo Posted July 5, 2023 Share Posted July 5, 2023 (edited) Why would that make you a bad aro? “Aromantic” means “doesn’t/rarely experiences romantic attraction”, not “is homophobic” or “has some burning hatred of the concept of romance”. If people are telling you it’s wrong to like gay romance you can tell them the Reagan administration called, they want their philosophy back Edited July 5, 2023 by Jot-Aro Kujo 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HelloThere Posted July 5, 2023 Share Posted July 5, 2023 5 minutes ago, Jot-Aro Kujo said: Why would that make you a bad aro? “Aromantic” means “doesn’t/rarely experiences romantic attraction”, not “is homophobic” or “has some burning hatred of the concept of romance”. If people are telling you it’s wrong to like gay romance you can tell them the Reagan administration called, they want their philosophy back Okay, that last part legitimately made me smile. Seriously, if someone’s telling them that then I don’t know what to say but the homophobia has gotta be real. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeltaAro Posted July 5, 2023 Share Posted July 5, 2023 My, oh my, that's a real problem! Good aros nurse their hatred to all things romantic. Keep themselves pure, don't yield an inch to romo. Don't you know? Confess your wrongdoings here: How are You a 'Bad' Aromantic Spectrum Person? ... hey, why does this have scare quotes around the bad...? 🤨 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovebird Posted July 5, 2023 Share Posted July 5, 2023 I like 'straight' romances and I'm still arospec. What you like doesn't have a basis on your orientation, and if anyone tells you otherwise, they're just a (gatekeeping) fool. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Newest Fabled Creature Posted July 6, 2023 Share Posted July 6, 2023 I love romances (to a certain degree, depends on how it's written), and although there are the few straight romances I like, I do tend to lean way more heavily into gay romances, as well. You're not a "bad" aro for liking romances, it's just a way to engage and like a specific type of genre or media. Besides, amatonormativity is the belief/assumption/etc that romance and romantic relationships are what "everyone strives for," and although romance can have that in it's media, there is romance without it out there. Yes, amatonormativity exists because of assumptions regarding romance and certain types of relationships, but romance, I wouldn't say, is inherently amatonormative. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Holmbo Posted July 6, 2023 Share Posted July 6, 2023 Yes you must return your aromantic membership card to the aro gatekeeping police 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
illumi Posted July 6, 2023 Share Posted July 6, 2023 i feel like this is going to become a thread where aros talk abt liking romance and im going to be 1 of em 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roboticanary Posted July 6, 2023 Share Posted July 6, 2023 This is bad news for me, I like stories about murder 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueMycena Posted July 6, 2023 Author Share Posted July 6, 2023 3 hours ago, roboticanary said: This is bad news for me, I like stories about murder Same, I love murder mystery books! Reading your guy's replies made me realize I was being paranoid, thank you. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Collie Posted July 7, 2023 Share Posted July 7, 2023 Nah. Just like some aces like to write and read smut (one of my friends falls into this category), some aros like to write and read romance. Just cuz you like stuff in fiction doesn't mean you like it irl. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Synthetic Adrenaline Posted July 21, 2023 Share Posted July 21, 2023 I find romance makes for great drama in fiction but in real life I just end up feeling caged and wanting my freedom back. Really not into mush either - not having to say I love you is the best. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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