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aroaces, what spaces are you more comfy in?


cyancat

primarily, what space are you most comfy in?  

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a question for the aroace folk out there: are you more comfortable in asexual (but not strictly aromantic) spaces or aromatic (but not strictly asexual) spaces?

context; i’ve found that because my aroace-ness isn’t equal - as in, one i see the world through over the other, i have a preference of the spaces i’m comfortable in. so even though i’m aroace, i’d rather be in one space than the other.

[cross post on aven too]

Edited by cyancat
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For me, I'm more comfy in aro spaces but that's mainly because my aro identity feels more important to me at the moment. It may be because it was only recently that I started identifying as aro (whereas I knew I was ace for longer), but I think it also has to do with the fact that my romantic orientation has a bigger impact on the way I view the world than my sexual orientation does. And other aros have more similar experiences in that regard, so I like hanging around those spaces more. 

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I am more comfortable in aro spaces.  I feel closer to the aro allos than to the allo aces. But it may be because I also relate more to my aromantic side than to my asexual side (I don't label as such, but I am probably close to "just aro" people when it comes to what importance I give to my sexuality).

 

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I feel far more comfy in aro spaces, the reason being that my aro label feels more relevant to me. allo aces may still like or want romantic relationships, which I do not want.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Unfortunately I don’t have a lot of contact to aro(/)aces offline, so I can’t tell exactly, but I feel like it would be aro spaces.

bc in the few times I came out as aroace I ever started to explain that asexuality does NOT mean not to fall in love or not to have a romantic relationship and only after that I started explaining that I am aromantic too and that the things I said before are actually not my reality, the whole process of explaining asexuality is explaining things that aren’t exactly my own life experience^^

and that kinda sucks

but on the other hands both parts are important for (and to understand) my identity 

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  • 1 month later...

I like aro spaces cause that feels like a bigger part of my identity.  Like being romance and sex repulsed are both important but I feel like if I was just asexual it would be more normalised than if I was just aro cause I could still engage in romantic things.

Edited by crazydreamer
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  • 3 weeks later...

Honestly, I enjoy being in spaces that have people of a variety of queer-umbrella identities.  It gives me a sense of perspective on other people's struggles.

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