Adult horse girl Posted September 5, 2019 Share Posted September 5, 2019 So, are you guys out to your loved ones? I haven't really felt the need to come out to be honest. My family still asks if I'm ever going to "find someone" as most families tend to do, but it's not difficult to live with. I think I'd rather deal with the questions and avoid having to explain the complex concept that is aromanticism, especially since I'd need to explain it in swedish where there aren't really any equivalent words that aren't clunky. I don't know, I'm still young and being single is still socially acceptable for me. What's your reasoning? 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Holmbo Posted September 6, 2019 Share Posted September 6, 2019 I've come out to all my friends years ago but for most of my family it still haven't come up. I would like to be out to them because it would be easier for me to talk about my life plans. Since being aro has a huge impact in how I see my future. But at the same time they never pressure me about romance and seems to be fine with me not dating. So it feels weird to bring it up. We don't really talk about our love life much with each other. BTW I'm Swedish too ? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Philotes Posted September 6, 2019 Share Posted September 6, 2019 I am out to my sister, her response was "you should just try dating" and that did not really encourage me to come out to my parents. My parents are starting to push me to tell them about my love life, probably because they feel like I am getting to old to not have a relationship (I'm 20 but yeah that's my parents vision of the world I guess). Which does bother me, but I do not think I will ever come out to my parents on my own. They will probably want to have a conversation with me about why I am still single when I'm around 25 and maybe I will tell them then. I am out to my 2 best friends and they are really supportive, so I also don't really feel the pressure to come out to my parents so that I will have someone to talk to. I'd say that if you don't feel the need to come out, don't. Because as you said, explaining aromanticism might be more complicated than dealing with the lovelife questions. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tagor Posted September 6, 2019 Share Posted September 6, 2019 Technically, I'm out to all my WhatsApp contacts as I once encoded an aomantic flag in Base64, represented it in Binary and sent a picture of this as a WhatsApp status. But I don't think anyone bothered to decode this. Effectively, I'm out to most of my friends as I tend to mention it if the topic comes up. I haven't come out to my family, as I wouldn't know when and how to approach the topic and it doesn't really matter as I'm young enough that being single isn't uncommon. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Artemis's Aro Posted September 21, 2019 Share Posted September 21, 2019 Same, I don't really feel the need to come out. I've come out to most of my friends and they're (for the most part) super accepting. Some of them have even sent me aro memes. But to my family? Nah. My parents don't even want me to date til after college and that just feels like a ridiculously easy thing to follow. The only thing I don't like is that once in a while they question me as to whether I have a "secret boyfriend" they don't know about, or my extended family will start questioning me as to what my "type" is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aro_elise Posted September 22, 2019 Share Posted September 22, 2019 yeah, i told my parents and a few close friends several months after i started identifying as aro at 17, and plenty more people since then. like, the very first person i told was my boyfriend at the time, and we broke up a couple months later, so partly it was part of my explanation to other people--not that i owed them one, but whatever. and i used to be apprehensive too, but it gets easier every time, i mean not accounting for the fact that the responses may not improve. overall, though, they've been good. but if you don't feel the need to come out, that's totally fine, it's up to you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nonmerci Posted September 22, 2019 Share Posted September 22, 2019 When I discovered I was aro I had the urge to tell people, but didn't because 1. I don't have a lot of friends, 2. I didn't know how to bring the subject naturally. Now, I don't feel like this any more. I think about it less. I just "come out" if the subject somehow comes in the conversation. Like the other day, I told someone I was ace just like that, I don't even know what we were talking about, but it sounds like a good idea to precise "I am ace" before saying something about sexe or I don't remember. (And it was fine by the way, I don't even know if "come out" is the good term for that because it was absolutely not the subject of our conversation). So I will not think of "coming out", but I can if I feel like it is good to say I am aro or ace if the conversation is about romanticism or sexuality, or something like that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Misanthropy Posted October 11, 2019 Share Posted October 11, 2019 I've always been wary about coming out but have realized that being as open as possible is best for communication purposes. People are far more likely to understand and be supportive if I am able to explain my experiences to them (without giving too much of a life story or trying to justify my feelings). Seeing as I am interested in being in a QPR, being open about being arospec (and ace) will hopefully assist me in communicating my intentions more effectively,thereby enabling others to better understand my experiences,while also helping me navigate my relationships with others better. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Aromantic Posted January 23, 2020 Share Posted January 23, 2020 I think it's up to each individual. I just recently (with the past month) "came out" to several friends. Many of them already knew (even if they didn't know the term), and all of them were accepting. Turns out they liked me for me all along (who knew?)! I don't feel comfortable coming out to family members. My Mom especially. She's 82 and still thinks I just haven't "found the right girl" yet. Because I've never had a steady girlfriend, some of them have asked me point blank if I'm gay. Which I found rather amusing, because they've never seen me with a steady boyfriend, either! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ardere Posted January 30, 2020 Share Posted January 30, 2020 I realized I was aro a few days ago actually... so no one really knows yet except my sis. I mean, I’d always noticed how differently I felt about romance than most of my friends for years only recently did I learn the term “Aromantic” I read the description and watched/read a ton of stuff about it and was like “yeah... that’s me”. Since Aromantic awareness week is coming up I figured that would be a good time to announce to my friends and family that the reason I’m single is because I want to be... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AllTimeBubble Posted February 8, 2020 Share Posted February 8, 2020 I came out to my family and friends mainly because I wanted to be completely true to myself and one way to do that for me was to open up to them. Also I wanted to stop the "OOOooooOOOOOOoooo, I bet you LiKe HiM" so theres that Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GiveMeCake Posted April 5, 2020 Share Posted April 5, 2020 overall, haven't come out irl cuz i haven't figured out the right way to cuz noone knows what it means and its not an urgent think soo... ya Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.