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About Magni

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    Aromantic Asexual & aplatonic-spec
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    College Student, Engineering major

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  1. I don't know of a lithro-related discord server, but I do know one server run by an aro who experiences romantic attraction and has channel for romance/relationship stuff, so it might be a more lithro-friendly setting compared to some other aro discords? If that sounds like something that you would find helpful, you can DM me and I can send you a link for it.
  2. Oriented aroace is for aroaces who experience other attractions such that they are oriented, for example an aroace who experiences strong queerplatonic attraction to people of all genders might consider themselves pan-oriented aroace. I like the concept of aroace flag as a single concept but have always strongly disliked the blue-orange one because the color symbolism is not innately recognizable as being related to ace & aro stuff, and had made my own flag shortly after the blue-orange one was made (can see flag coining post here for meanings etc).
  3. ...there's another thread on this forum where had big conversation of what a-spec means, personally I as an agender person do not think agender should be included under a-spec bc while you would talk about ace-spec and aro-spec, you don't talk about agender-spec, so why would agender be part of a-spec? agender is part of nonbinary.
  4. I tend to view "aroace" as a single word encapsulating both, as opposed to "aro ace" or "aromantic asexual" which is just combining the two separate words into a phrase. You could also identify specifically as "a-spec", which can be used for not differentiating the attractions you don't feel into different types, though that is more commonly used as broad umbrella term.
  5. Romantic attraction is hard to define for everyone, and especially amongst aros who don't feel it. However, recently ended up trying define it as "a bundle of various other types of attraction, though specific attractions involved can vary, and which is also wrapped up together with wanting it to be romantic and the societal norms that entails." Basically, if you feel various attractions and you aren't sure if they could maybe be considered romantic or not, but you don't want it to be romantic attraction or don't desire a romantic relationship based on those attractions, then it's not romantic attraction. Also, having problems differentiating between romantic and platonic/other attractions would fall under quoiromantic, which is still aro-spec and also included under aro/aromantic.
  6. Hey, sorry there hasn't been much progress on this recently. I recently made an aro activism discord server, where I hope we will be able to make better progress on projects such as this one. Link to the discord server is here: https://discord.gg/vmRVPRV . I also made a post on the forums here with a bit more info, found here.
  7. I decided to create a discord server for aro activism in general, since oftentimes there's a lot of people who are interested in getting involved with things but don't necessarily know how, or people with ideas for projects that are difficult to implement on their own. There are channels for general aro activism topics and then for more specific projects. There's a channel for the aro wiki project which has been discussed here, and I hope to make more progress with it since a platform like discord facilitates more active communication. Another project currently planned is an ongoing project to create infographics related to aro topics which can facilitate spreading information. This is a generally serious server focused on trying to accomplish things and we would prefer for people to be at least around 16 years old. Here's the link for the server: https://discord.gg/vmRVPRV Let me know if you have any questions
  8. My submission for AUREA’s Aros Create Pride event (which you can read about here).  This is a few of my favorite patches I’ve embroidered.  I posted this on tumblr (link here) but am crossposting it here as another place where people could potentially leave comments.


    Patch 1: Aroace Arrow through Inverted Spade-heart

    This patch uses the aroace flag I made (seen here).  It utilizes a spade, which is an aroace symbol, which I’ve inverted so it looks somewhat like a heart, which is being pierced by the arrow. (I’ve previously shared this patch in this post).


    Patch 2: Aromatic Aromantic 

    This one has a chemistry pun; so, the basic type of aromatic molecules is a 6-carbon ring with 3 double bonds, and the simplistic way of depicting this is a hexagon with a circle inside of it.  This patch has the hexagon with a circle aromatic symbol in gold.  In between the hexagon and the circle is the aro pride flag.  I thought inside the circle looked plain so I added a bow and arrow inside of it in silver because of Artemis. Then across the top is the word “Aromantic”, mostly in white but the “n” is green such that reading just the white letters would say “Aromatic”, thus it can be read as “Aromatic Aromantic”.  (I’ve previously posted a tutorial of this patch here).


    Patch 3: Demiplatonic apl-apple

    This one plays on the pun where aplatonic is shortened to apl, thus apl apple.  I added a triangle to the aplatonic flag to make it demiplatonic, which is how I specifically identify.  (I’ve previously posted a tutorial of this patch here).

    1. John Rando

      John Rando

      Hey, that's a wonderfull work you deed here. Even more so since you posted tutorials to allow others to reproduce it, spreading the pride further ! I like the 3 of them, but as a nerd, my favourite is of course the aroma(n)tic one. I also like the last one because there is very little apl pride ideas that I know (beside flags, of course), so this one is a great one too. This is great inspiration for tee shirt designs, so thank you !


    2. aspecofstardust


      I really love the symbolism and attention to detail you have put in this work! I love the idea of inverting the spade. It makes me think more about the aromanticism embedded in the spade symbol, which is really cool! I might need to take a page out of your book and embroider myself some patches :) Thanks for sharing!!

    3. Ruby123


      Hi! These are amazing, I love them! I really like the puns and the symbolism, and the cool designs you’ve created from them. My favourite also has to be the aromatic aromantic one. I love chemistry and I think this is such a cool idea! I also love how you’ve designed your own flags for specific identities that don’t get a lot of representation. It’s great to finally see an aesthetically pleasing aroace flag, and also a demiplatonic flag! Thank you for sharing these and I hope you had a good pride month!😊💚

  9. People might make the same argument against people using aromantic as a term. And like, not everyone has to label everything they experience, but some people do find it useful. Microlabels are useful and validating, and having any sort of word describing an experience makes it easier to find other people who also feel that thing. This is an interesting point to me; on one hand, describing things in the context of attraction is simplest, it is parallel to other identities, and it ties into the idea of it being what you inherently feel rather than what you do. This can likely be traced to kindof the "born this way" narrative, describing things as being an innate thing about yourself that cannot be changed, bc otherwise people would argue even more that you should just change. However, platonic attraction is such a vague thing, it's not something mainstream populations notice as a thing that is felt, and while some people do actively feel it, due to the vagueness it is even harder to identify that you don't feel it. I think for aplatonic, dual definitions is perhaps more helpful, one based in attraction and one not. Though tbh I kinda grow weary of attempting to argue definitions for it in general and tend to avoid concretely defining it these days, and instead tend to talk about my experiences with the term bc while I feel I understand it and the meaning, I feel like I can't adequately explain it and my attempts to do so would only be met with criticism.
  10. So, squish would technically be platonic attraction, yes. People also use squish for queerplatonic attraction, though technically there's other specific words for that, most people just use squish. I think it makes more sense when looking at parallels with other types of attraction? So like, for me, there's an extent to which I want to have friends, and I will look at people around me for qualities that make someone seem like good friend potential and decide to pursue that because I want to have friends, but I don't really feel a pull towards befriending specific people and it kinda reminds me of before I knew I was aro, when theoretically evaluating who would be a good person to have a crush on in a logical way, except the difference is I do actually want to pursue making friends. I sometimes rarely experience squishes after I already feel very close to someone, and then I want to be even closer to them and want to spend time with them specifically, as opposed to wanting to spend time with someone and they happen to be the most likely person to spend time with. So, there's a difference between wanting to have friends and do platonic things, vs wanting to be friends with someone specifically when experiencing platonic attraction towards them.
  11. This seems like a cool project (I saw tumblr post first and reblogged it there), though I don't think I'll have the time to actively participate since I seem to be involved in too many projects to begin with. I'm unsure if the ideas you list are intended to be just things to be included or if it's supposed to be options for a theme to center the entire zine around; if the latter, I'd caution against the "No romo love stories" one, because even if it's looking at very diverse implementations of love, placing emphasis on having a certain amount of love of any form can be kinda alienating to some people. Another suggestion for just how to like...feasibly implement things, is to set up a discord server or something that people who are interested can join, or at least to set up a google form where people can more formally express interest and you can gain email addresses to contact people, bc currently just seeing if people are interested but not really having a way for people to sign up or for you to contact specific people who are interested, it will be hard to practically start doing things. This sounds like a cool project, I wish you luck!
  12. I finished my submission, @Apathetic Echidna. I ended up drawing the aro One Ring idea (and used the translator you'd linked earlier in this thread :). Link to my submission is here: https://aromagni.tumblr.com/post/622395923181568000/aromantic-pride-is-precious-carnival-of-aros
  13. ....I wasn't assuming negative intent or looking to interpret it negatively because it was coyote? Rather, I'd assumed good intent that happened to be poorly worded in a way that unintentionally came across as harmful. If anything, the fact is was coyote made me less inclined to say anything because I generally try to avoid direct interaction since it never seems to go well. However, I as an aplatonic person felt a need to say something because I was uncomfortable with what was said, I'd have addressed it regardless of who said it, it's just that most people wouldn't have responded with such passive aggressive hostility, which if anything did indicate bad intent. *** (idk if I missed anywhere else that people tagged me expecting answers to stuff but this is like general answer to all questions directed at me that are still left "open") I don't think it's a good idea for me to continue debating this topic further? but I feel the need to acknowledge things in some way so my brain will stop dwelling on it/stop feeling obligated to reply. I was upset with initial comment regarding aplatonicism as an aplatonic person (which, I realize in hindsight I hadn't specifically mentioned me being aplatonic in that initial comment but I do know I'd mentioned it on a previous thread y'all were involved in where the definition of aplatonic was discussed). Sometimes it is difficult to pinpoint exactly why something bothers me beyond just that it does but I do generally try to attempt an explanation, though apparently my explanations aren't very clear. The responses I received just made me feel dismissed and made me defensive such that I end up trying to defensively overexplain myself, which if anything probably makes my explanations less clear, so then people find more problems with what I say to pick apart to debate me making me defensively explain even more, etc, it cycles like that and goes nowhere productive. Yeah, this still hasn't been addressed, it seems like people would rather pick apart everything I say and debate other things rather than actually acknowledge that hey multiple people including those who identify with aplatonic have an issue with what was said so maybe there's an issue here. ( @VoidArcana seems to word the points I'm trying to make better than I can/I generally agree with aer.) I'm not gonna further participate in this debate bc it seems pointless for me to do so and having to justify why I feel upset by something while having my emotions dismissed and my words misinterpreted is distressing to me.
  14. It's not about "you shouldn't phrase it like that bc exclusionists will say it's weird", it's "I feel hurt by what you are saying because it is similar to hurtful things exclusionists have said". I feel like only one part of the problem is being recognized; it's not just the definition used, it's that combined with the context/example. The vast majority of people who use aplatonic are arospec or acespec in some way, maybe there's some neurodivergent alloromantic allosexual people who may use it but otherwise I'd be wary of an alloromantic allosexual person using aplatonic and defining it as "I don't love my friends", and even more wary of it being used as a random example by someone else for why aplatonic wouldn't be included in a community. It's not just the definition, it's the statement as a whole that comes across like exclusionist rhetoric which I find hurtful. *** This....didn't need to turn into a debate? You could've just acknowledged that what you said came across as hurtful/you would try to do better in the future, and moved on? Instead of debating me that it isn't hurtful when I'm telling you it is.
  15. I find this to be passive aggressive and entirely unnecessary. Also your paraphrasing has an entirely different connotation and context then the quote you cite in your justification. And like....when I, as an aplatonic-spec person, tell you that I find what you're saying about aplatonic people to be offensive, the proper response would be to stop and think about how what you're saying comes across negatively and ask for clarification if needed, not to dismiss my concerns and further justify yourself. @CoyoteI don't like how you seem to be equating aplatonic with, like, just some allo person going "I don't love my friends"? It reminds me of exclusionist rhetoric and the ways people have ridiculed the term aplatonic. (idk how to word this better rn but can try to elaborate later if needed) I will elaborate on why I had a problem with your comment. It wasn't just the flippant definition of aplatonic you used, but the rest of the context and how it is similar to exclusionist rhetoric. Exclusionists would say stuff like "oh a cis heteroromantic heterosexual person who doesn't have friends can just say they're aplatonic and pretend to be lgbt" and just generally ridicule it as a term a lot. Do you understand how what you said comes across similarly to that?
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