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About Tarantulapaws

  • Birthday 06/24/2000

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    coffee cryptid

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  1. I've also been through this, and I know it's very hard to do this. But it's important that they let them know how you're feeling (or not feeling.) Did they ever officially ask you out? If not, that's a place to start. Communication is very important in any relationship, romantic or not. If they never asked or pushed your boundaries to ask, that should be addressed. Not saying anything will just hurt yourself and potentially them as well. That all said: this is not your fault if you got pressured into this, your own feelings and boundaries are more important than letting others push yours, no matter how they feel about you. I'm sorry you're dealing with this right now and I hope it gets resolved peacefully.
  2. banned for calling me out on banning someone in the past ten minutes- in the past six minutes.
  3. Banned for not getting banned in past week.
  4. My index finger is just slightly longer. I'm a nonbinary aro.
  5. I never heard of either of these terms, but they ring true to my experiences. Especially disenfranchised grief. When you lose a friend it's often like you can't even talk about it, as if the pain can't be comparable to losing a romantic partner. And maybe it's because I'm aro, but breaking up with a romantic partner never hurt me as horribly as losing a friend. So while it's possible to avoid some grief in not getting into romantic relationships... If you make connections with people, chances are you'll experience loss in some form anyways.
  6. 42% demisexual....33% aromantic, 8% the other two options... Hm. Kinda off. This quiz made little sense. Couldn't wrap my head around some of the options at all, none of them corresponded with my thoughts or experiences. Or they did and the wording was confusing.
  7. Thank you. I appreciate this comment a lot- sorry it's been a whole month before a response, but I'll keep all this in mind.
  8. Just laying around. Might be mutually playing video games or saying something now and then.
  9. Read this for a second time and almost spat my water out. And the thread had been intended to be about gender expression and aromanticism. Essentially, does the concept of gender expression (or gender roles) being tied to couple things, effect aros any way in particular? I'm sorry I rambled the way I did in the original post. I didn't quite understand my own question until nonmerci put it to better words. Edit: Still messed this up. Intended to go on to say that I wondered if it affected the gender expression of aros.
  10. Prefacing this by saying that it is nearly 2am and that I'm on here waiting on my phone to charge. I may not make much sense. I... think I could have been right about being aroace, just, I may be gray ace. This explains a lot to me. Realizing that there was a reason I feel a disconnect between my body's function and the act of actually doing things helped a lot. I ended up finally processing that I really have boundaries due to the conversation I had with the ace person who made me realize this (the story is really funny). That being said, I'm still attached to the label as a bi aro. I still relate to it. Leaves me feeling like I'm in this weird spot where both are technically right. I don't always genuinely experience sexual attraction, but when I do it's potentially to 2+ genders. Basically, question: does the both is good gif apply?
  11. Further context. I probably forgot to give. She identifies as demisexual. I think she's just in the mindset surrounding sex of 'damned if you do and damned if you don't'- so yes and no? Not about herself for sure but she is a hypocrite. Sometime I'll have to ask her what she actually thinks of the acespec community.
  12. O: another aro bi! Awesome to see you here!!! I'm sorry about what happened with your friend... and I hope you like it here!!
  13. Dangit could have sworn I looked for a thread before I wrote this. Also YES. This was what I was attempting to describe in not so many words!!
  14. Been meaning to ask for a while now, but does anyone feel that their aroness interacts with how you express your gender? While I am already a nonbinary person, I find that one thing that factors into how i present is that I'm not trying to attract anyone's attention in a romantic way if that makes sense. I also find that when it comes to not doing that I have a tendency to go for looks that are in other lgbt+ people's tastes rather than the tastes of cis straight men. I guess I was just wondering because I hear a bunch about gay/lesbian orientations and gender non-conformity, but very little about aromantic or bi and pansexual instances of this. Do aces do this too? Edit: Maybe I should specify that what I mean above is that when given the choice to present femininely, I often won't. And when I do it's in non traditional ways. One reason I do this along with dysphoria and just aesthetic is that sometimes I really don't want anyone's attention. It often doesn't work so well when it comes to friends forming crushes on you as I've learned, but it's still something I've done for years that ties into how I look on a daily basis.
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