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Violet Stars

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About Violet Stars

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  • Birthday September 26

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    Aro ace
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  • Location
    Massachussetts, USA

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  1. YMBAI if people dating when they're emotionally immature sounds weird to you (I guess it isn't exclusively an aro thing, but whatever)
  2. I don't really know. I'm years away from being financially independent so I don't really have time to worry. Living alone sounds like nice, but so does chilling with one/a few close friends! I'm pretty stubborn when it comes to... well everything. I'm also a perfectionist who wants everything to be at least aesthetically pleasing lol. My dream is to rent a loft apartment, ideally one with a little area above the main floor. They're very spacious and get a lot of natural light, things I am both a fan of. Unfortunately they're quite expensive. I can't really imagine sharing a bed. I fidget a lot in my sleep and would be prone to elbowing/slapping my sleep partner across the face.
  3. Oh yeah I guess I just interpreted it differently lol.
  4. Hmm... you could probably find it on Amazon, bookdepository, Barnes & Noble... pretty much any place where books are sold. It shouldn't be that hard to find. It is VERY in-depth and comprehensive, even going so far as to discuss romantic orientation as separate from sexual! I would highly recommend it!
  5. This is an attempt to form a megathread, a union of the aroaces across this site. Come here to chat, to share your experiences, send memes, and plot your villainous schemes while the others are busy falling in love/having sex. With this, the alien invasion can truly begin, MWAHAHA! On a more serious note, a discussion about aromanticism in relation to asexuality made me realize we do not have a dedicated space to talk about our own experiences, so I'm making one! Feel free to talk about anything you want here. Aroallos and others are welcome as well!
  6. Same here! I'm glad I'm not the only one. I think it's because what everyone is discussing here—romance is a far more universal part of life than sex. Sex is seen as NSFW, something to discuss behind closed doors. Romance is not, it's expressed openly and publicly. Therefore it's a much bigger aspect of everyday life. I'm not out to most people I know either, but I still heard the dreaded "you'll understand when you get older" when I ever expressed disdain for romance in any capacity. Part of the reason why I believed I was straight for such a long time as a kid was because of all these things people told me. When you're a kid, you haven't learned to question the beliefs of the adults around you. I discovered my aroace-ness when I was 12, almost 13. And it was all thanks to a book at my local library, The ABCs of LGBT+ by Ash Hardell. If I hadn't found that book or Ash hadn't included ace and aro-spec identities I would probably still be unsure about myself. Or maybe not, since a friend of mine mentioned asexuality once after I had discovered it. But even though I was still very young, I could've found my identity a lot sooner if I heard less of that. Mind you, I was a kid, but people should be encouraging children to explore their identity, not discouraging it. This infantilization is not exclusive to aces. Regardless of whether someone identifies as aro or not, society treats anyone who isn't looking for romance as having something wrong with them. Sex is an important part of our culture, yes, but romance even more so. And being aro has taught me that whenever you try to form a definition of humanity, you're going to leave somebody out.
  7. That sounds really nice! One of the struggles of being aro is being left behind because your friends all get partners and completely ignore you. I would say my aro-ness definitely impacts my friendships. I value them a lot more than an allo would, and with that comes the existential dread I'll one day be replaced by a romantic partner. A book I was reading triggered this in me, since a character in a relationship explicitly said they valued a friend less than their partner.
  8. Ooh, I have an even better idea. A game console with controllers that sense input when your not even touching it, causing your character or the camera to "drift" to a certain side. aka the Switch's joycons
  9. It's the Asexual Visibility and Education Network! Basically like this place but for asexuals. I've been on there for two years and counting! I'd recommend you check it out!
  10. Someone was talking about this on AVEN! They proposed the word "nosexual" which is kinda silly IMO 😅. Either way I hope you find one! For now, I'm fine with using aroace.
  11. My parents told me romantic relationships weren't serious until you got to high school (we all know why). Because of this, I thought it was weird that kids were already having crushes and in some cases even dating in elementary school. In my mind, romance was this big kid thing that you got into when you were older, not when you were a kid. Despite the fact most kids have their first crushes at five years old. FIVE. Probably would've figured it out sooner if it weren't for the barrages of "you'll like when you get older."
  12. How would you describe your sexual feelings, if you absolutely had to? Why do you choose not to follow the split-attraction model? How did you find this label for yourself? I'm just curious, that's all. I've never heard of non-SAM aros before joining this forum, and I'm curious to learn about you all!
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