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felinelicks

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About felinelicks

  • Rank
    Newbie
  • Birthday 10/10/1996

Personal Information

  • Name
    Felix
  • Orientation
    Aro Bisexual
  • Gender
    Male
  • Pronouns
    He/him

Recent Profile Visitors

439 profile views
  1. I'm glad! No problem. Ah well, the reason I can't get it yet is because I'm closeted so it's kind of my own doing 🤷‍♂️ But whatever, I'll get there. I hope everything goes smoothly, with your therapist and with top surgery
  2. Yeah I agree that it was inappropriate. I understand that not all LGBT people are super involved in the community, but you would think being queer himself would help him be more considerate when it comes to identities he's not familiar with. Especially if he's the one they usually refer queer people to, it's kind of important for him to educate himself on these things. If you're comfortable with it I'd bring it up, and if his response doesn't reassure you it might be time to look for a new therapist. Or after he writes your top surgery letter anyway (congrats on getting that btw! I'm jealous lol).
  3. I've mentioned that I don't really ever want to get married, but I haven't come out as aro. I own a few pride things and I've actively lied about what they represent. I don't really know why. I'm not ashamed of who I am and I want to be open about it, but it's just hard for me to do that when I know a lot of people will think it's weird or won't understand it, or might not even believe that it's a real thing. I also know most people don't know what aromanticism is and I don't want to have to go through the whole process of explaining it every time it comes up. I usually just say vaguely that I'm not interested in dating right now and leave it at that.
  4. Tbh if I was you I would say that to him, that you feel like he's not being honest. I'm very conflict avoidant but I've found that when it comes to therapy it's best to get everything that's bothering you off your chest, even if (especially if) it's about your therapist. Maybe that sounds hypocritical since I just said I'm avoiding coming out as aro to my therapist lol, but like since this is about a conversation you already had with him where he did something to upset you I think it's important. My therapist has said shit that was so upsetting that I almost rage quit therapy, but when I worked up the nerve to bring it up her response completely reassured me and it ended up strengthening the relationship. It's so weird to me that a therapist would do that in general, let alone two of them. It sucks that that happened to you. It's especially weird to me that an nb person would say something like that, specifically because it's so similar to the way people talk about gender being on a spectrum, acting skeptical and saying you're overthinking it, etc. I'm surprised he wasn't able to empathize with that a little more. Does he know that your previous therapist did that? Might be something worth bringing up. Maybe he would understand more why his response upset you.
  5. Sorry to hear that he reacted that way. I don't know if it was his intention, but if my therapist interrupted me to read a google definition after acting skeptical I would definitely read that as passive aggressive. I've never talked about aro stuff in therapy specifically because I'm afraid I'll get this kind of reaction. My therapist is familiar with the LGBT community and seems pretty accepting so I think she'd react okay? But I know most people don't know much about aros and I really wouldn't want to hear some ignorant shit in response. You're not overthinking it. There's a reason labels like demi or gray aro are used, it can help people understand themselves and what they feel. Realizing I'm aro helped me understand a lot about myself, and it can be really confusing when you first start questioning so I get why you wanted to talk about it with him. I would bring it up at your next session and tell him that what he said made you feel awful and you don't believe that he's taking you seriously. If he really didn't mean to come across that way, then if he's a good therapist he'll apologize and use the feedback to change the way he's talking to you about this to avoid making you feel that way again.
  6. Yeah, I agree with this. It's weird to me when people act like sexual attraction is just about looks. That's definitely part of it but there's more to it than that. Personality traits are a big factor in sexual attraction to me. Finding out that someone I thought was hot is actually an asshole can kill the attraction, and realizing that someone I didn't initially find super attractive is really cool or has certain traits I like can make them way more attractive to me. Some of the people I've been most attracted to were people I didn't initially think were hot, but they had the kind of personality I'm drawn to and it changed the way I perceive them. Yes! Same here. I'm honestly way more attracted to men than to women when I do find one I like, but the way most men present themselves is so boring that it took me a long time to even realize I was into men. It didn't seem real when the only guys I liked were anime characters lol, but when I did start noticing real guys who caught my interest it was much more intense, to the point that I thought I might actually be gay, but at the end of the day I'm still attracted to women too. It's just different.
  7. I'm a big Danganronpa fan too! I'd say V3 is my favorite. I binged all the games over the course of like a week and it seemed like they just kept getting better with each game. Kokichi and Fuyuhiko are my favorite characters, and Toko/Genocide Jack. Byakuya was my fav when I originally played the first game. I didn't think about Rantaro being aro while I was playing the game, but I've heard about the headcanon and I can totally see it. I headcanon Shuichi and Kaito as having an alterous attraction/QPR kind of a thing and it's probably my favorite dynamic between two characters in the whole series. The only thing I didn't like about V3 was that it pushed romance a lot more than the other games. The Kaito/Maki romance really annoyed me, and Shuichi/Kaede.
  8. I work in veterinary medicine for the same reason, haha. I'm a veterinary receptionist, ultimately hoping to become a veterinarian, though I've been considering going to school to be a tech instead. Part of me feels like my actual dream job would more creative, like in the arts, but I think the reality of having to worry about making my art marketable enough to pay the bills would ruin my passion for it. It's probably better as a hobby for me. Being a vet is my dream because I've always had this strong desire to help animals, but even just working in the field as a receptionist is insanely stressful for my anxiety disordered self. Sometimes I think it would be nice to go back to working in a field where there aren't literally lives on the line, but this is important to me so I don't want to give up on it.
  9. I haven't watched Good Omens yet, but I've experienced this so many times. It's so frustrating. It sucks to see this dynamic I really want and then go online and see everyone talking about how the exact things I like about it mean that they're obviously in love. Like it's impossible to have a connection like that without romance. It's complicated because I'm allosexual and my ideal QPR would be sexual, so part of me does like some of the shippy content. But it's exhausting that it's always paired with romance and I have to wade through all these invalidating comments about how the only thing they could possibly feel for each other is romantic love. It's just not true. There are other kinds of love, other kinds of relationships that can be just as intense. People get so caught up in their ships that they refuse to see any other possible interpretation. And it's the same thing with characters that seem aro ending up in romantic relationships. It's like people don't even consider the possibility that they could be happy without romance. Never even occurs to them. If a character doesn't express interest in the opposite gender, people just think they're gay or haven't met the right person or whatever. Obviously people can ship or headcanon whatever they want, I'm just salty because it's everywhere. I can't escape it.
  10. Tbh I've always handled these situations by just avoiding the hell out of those people lol. Like this guy at my old work kept flirting with me and tried to get my mom to set us up (we all worked at the same store) and when she told me he was going to ask me out I just avoided his area of the store all day. He must have realized I wasn't interested because he completely ignored me after that and was actually kind of an ass to my mom. 🙄 Just a complete 180 after months of pretending to be friendly with both of us. I've never understood why allos are like that. To me if you completely lose interest in me as a person when you find out I don't want to date you, you never really liked me. I don't get it. Why did you want to date me if you don't want to be friends with me? My actual worst rejection was probably ending a long-term romantic relationship by ghosting her. I did go back and explain myself and officially end things after a while but it was a shitty thing to do. I just got overwhelmed with everything, and I didn't know I was aro yet so I didn't know why. There was more to that than just being aro though. My stories aren't very fun either lol. I'm oblivious when it comes to this shit too. I never know what to do. It seems like there's no way out of it that doesn't upset people.
  11. There's a kickstarter going for enamel pins of the same design and a bunch of other pride weapons. Cool stuff!
  12. Used computers with all the old info, including passwords, permanently built in. They don't give you the password.
  13. Your Raw Score is: -315, which indicates that overall you are Androgynous Your appearance is Androgynous Your brain processes are mostly that of a Androgynous person. You appear to socialize in a androgynous manner. You believe you have mild conflicts about your gender identity. You indicated your were born Female. ANALYSIS: Female to Male Transsexual in doubt about your ability to successfully transition. NOTES: Your Answers indicate your psychological state has likely prevailed since you were quite young. Fair enough but idk where they got "in doubt about your ability to successfully transition" from. I haven't transitioned yet because i'm not in a good place to do so, not because i don't think i could pass or whatever... I wouldn't put much stock in this because it's obviously based on stereotypes but it's interesting to compare results!
  14. I have. She asked me out and thanks to amatonormativity i thought maybe i wanted to be with her too, so i said yes. I knew i wasn't ~in love~ or anything, but i liked her a lot and i figured it would develop over time. At the time, i remember being pretty nervous and unsure about the whole thing, but i figured we were just going on one date to see if we were a good match. Imagine my surprise when she referred to me as her SO the next day! We clearly had different ideas of what we were agreeing to in the beginning, but i didn't want to ruin it by disagreeing so i was like "welp guess i have a gf now." I think part of it was a social status thing too -- i wanted to get an SO because my friends all paired off or at least had been in a relationship before, and i was afraid people would think i was a loser who couldn't get a date, instead of just not wanting one. I wanted a girlfriend so i could say i had one, and to prove to myself that i was appealing enough for someone to pick me as "the one" over everyone else they knew. That's not what i was thinking at all when i agreed to go out with her, but i sort of knew i had that mindset and in retrospect it definitely made me more inclined to believe i was falling for her even as it became more and more clear that i wasn't. We were together for about a year and a half, although i felt wrong about the whole thing for most of the relationship. I didn't want to lose her as a friend, so i stuck around a lot longer than i should have. It was incredibly stressful and i felt really guilty for not feeling the way i was "supposed" to feel. Very happy to be out of that relationship, even though she's a great girl. Feels like i can finally breathe right again!
  15. Yeah i'd love to see more! There's a lot of potential for a great sequel or a story about another "heartless" character. There's a print version of the first few chapters, but not the whole story. It's a shame, i would definitely buy it.
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