Evelyn Posted February 4, 2019 Share Posted February 4, 2019 My, friend it thick and im trying to explain asexualtiy and aromanticisum to him but he doesnt get it... how should i explain it? Hes a straight morman guy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Autumn Posted February 4, 2019 Share Posted February 4, 2019 That is a tough one...at a certain point if he won't hear it he won't hear it, but if the literal definition isn't cutting it then maybe try comparisons to something he knows? Like, bring up someone you know he is very-much-in-no-way-attracted-to-at-all, bonus points if it is a girl in his age range, and ask how he KNOWS he isn't attracted to that person, or to focus on that lack of feeling and say that likewise, you feel that lack of feeling with everyone. Allo people DO know what not feeling attraction to a specific person feels like, but they struggle with the idea that someone wouldn't experience it, so bringing the idea to something more "grounded" might help. As for romance, all I can think for explaining it is 'I have never had any experience resembling how people describe crushes' or something similar...really there's only so many ways to describe something without going into analogies (which you could try! I don't know any good ones offhand though, but it could be a helpful tool). Dunno if this helps, but hopefully your friend comes around eventually! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NotHeartless Posted February 4, 2019 Share Posted February 4, 2019 Also make clear asexuality and aromanticism are orientations and not a choice. Asexuality has nothing to do with celibacy, only waiting until marriage or to save yourself up for "the one" and aromanticism isn't the conscious decision to stay single (though it can result in it). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Posted February 4, 2019 Share Posted February 4, 2019 5 minutes ago, NotHeartless said: Also make clear asexuality and aromanticism are orientations and not a choice. Asexuality has nothing to do with celibacy, only waiting until marriage or to save yourself up for "the one" and aromanticism isn't the conscious decision to stay single (though it can result in it). Also make it clear that they are different things and should not be conflated. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eatingcroutons Posted February 5, 2019 Share Posted February 5, 2019 18 hours ago, Evelyn said: My, friend it thick and im trying to explain asexualtiy and aromanticisum to him but he doesnt get it... how should i explain it? Hes a straight morman guy. "You know how you feel zero sexual or romantic attraction to men? I feel that way about everyone." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Naegleria fowleri Posted February 5, 2019 Share Posted February 5, 2019 6 hours ago, eatingcroutons said: "You know how you feel zero sexual or romantic attraction to men? I feel that way about everyone." Or as my professor once put it, "So it's like being a straight boy in a room full of straight boys." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Posted February 6, 2019 Share Posted February 6, 2019 On 2/5/2019 at 6:29 AM, Naegleria fowleri said: Or as my professor once put it, "So it's like being a straight boy in a room full of straight boys." You could leave it at "straight boy in a room full of boys"; "straight girl in a room full of girls"; "gay boy in a room full of girls" or "lesbian in a room full of boys". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arostar Posted April 14, 2019 Share Posted April 14, 2019 Letting your friend watch this youtube channel called, "Slice of Ace" could be a good start. It seems to cover most common questions about asexuality and sometimes aromanticism. Throwing in some comics about the experience might visually help him understand as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Magni Posted April 14, 2019 Share Posted April 14, 2019 One thing that can be useful in general is explaining the difference between sexual attraction and libido. Food metaphors can also be useful for explaining attraction in a more tangible way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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