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How does gender affect who you are romantically attracted to?


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How does gender affect who you are romantically attracted to?

I never understood how what gender someone identified as changed if you loved them or not. because a woman can still dress masculine and men can dress femininely and and same for non binary people. I don't understand what makes someone attracted to people so  I don't understand this much. is it looks? personality? or something else? because none of them seem to have gender affecting them.

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For most it's probably either an attraction to a certain body type or err.. to people who possess certain body parts. Also, some may have certain types of styles or categories they prefer in a partner because the other person is relatable or because they feel like they balance each other out.

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the body part is sort of irrelevant because I'm talking about gender not sex and also I don't understand how it is relevant by the fact that's sexual attraction not romantic. 

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I have a gender preference and I honestly don't know lol, it doesn't make sense to me either. I think it's just how my brain is wired.

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I personally don't get it, but I think it's just very nuanced. I also think it has a lot to do with different types of attraction. Someone could find men and women attractive but only want to sleep with women so they identify as just being romantically attracted to women because it would work better for their lifestyle to date someone they are also sexually attracted too. Someone could be aro and find men and women sexually attractive but only sleep with men because of trauma or finding it easier to be in qprs with men. I think it's just much to wide a spectrum to have one answer to. More of a case to case thing, you know?

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13 hours ago, Apex said:

I have a gender preference and I honestly don't know lol, it doesn't make sense to me either. I think it's just how my brain is wired.

i posted the same question on AVEN and no one also seems to know either but i am going to try and figure it out

13 hours ago, Fanz_0__Fire said:

I personally don't get it, but I think it's just very nuanced. I also think it has a lot to do with different types of attraction. Someone could find men and women attractive but only want to sleep with women so they identify as just being romantically attracted to women because it would work better for their lifestyle to date someone they are also sexually attracted too. Someone could be aro and find men and women sexually attractive but only sleep with men because of trauma or finding it easier to be in qprs with men. I think it's just much to wide a spectrum to have one answer to. More of a case to case thing, you know?

but if an asexual dated someone how would gender affect it

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5 hours ago, Garlic Bread said:

but if an asexual dated someone how would gender affect it

I'm not entirely sure, but I think my answer is still pretty close to the same. They may only feel romantic attraction to one gender. Or they may just choose for one reason or another that it's better for their current lifestyle to date one gender over the other. I really can't give a definitive answer to the question of asexuals because I myself am not asexual, but a lot of things go in to what attractions people have and which they act on. In the end, I think it's specific to individual people what gender/genders they are attracted to and which genders they choose to go out with. I'd imagine it's much the same as who aro people choose to be in qprs with in what I said before. Someone who is ace could probably give a better answer, but that's my understanding of it

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I don't actually know. But aces who are alloromantic definitely have a gender they are attracted to. I think it's because at some level, most people are wired to be attracted to others. For most, sexual and romantic attractions tend to align. For those who it does not, those preferences for gender still remain.

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