Queen of Spades Posted March 25, 2020 Share Posted March 25, 2020 When thinking of aromanticism and all the misconceptions associated with it, the first to pop into our minds would undoubtedly be the classic, ignorant "aromantic people can't feel love". This issue has been discussed countless times so far, and a bunch of sound arguments have been lain on the table in order to show that this bullshit is not true. Unfortunately, this misconception is not the only one of its level. The other one, somewhat less talked about, is that "aromantic people are happy to be single". While this applies indeed to quite a few of us, it is far from being a general rule. I know a person who is a regular heteromantic, yet she said she doesn't envisage herself sharing her life with a partner. Then why wouldn't the reverse be true as well? There are aromantic people who seek a relationship which might look like a typical romantic one from the outside, but this does not make their aromanticism less valid. I am one of them. One of my biggest wishes is to find someone to share my life with. The kind of relationship I seek does have some elements which are traditionally considered romantic (more specifically, the intimacy: kissing, cuddling, holding hands, etc.). And yes, like many people, I feel this need to be someone's number one. "But how is this different from romantic attraction??", many may ask. Well, I'll tell you how. I never walk around the streets, spot a random guy, and think "YOU". It's this spark thing that I'm alienated from. And the dating/flirting thing. And the so-called butterflies in the stomach. And the idea of falling. Because I don't *fall* in love, I walk into it. And when I do, my feelings are strong. Different from normal friendship, but nor are they romantic in nature because like I said, I don't get over the moon and stuff. And if the feelings are not reciprocated, I respect it. But this doesn't mean I don't suffer. On the contrary, I am devastated. And as my feelings are not the result of a chemical attraction, the pain always remains. And I fear that I might never find what I seek. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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