yeshomonoromo Posted January 22, 2019 Share Posted January 22, 2019 One thing I noticed, is that most people who are sensitive, shy, weird, smart, nerdy, metal lovers, introverts, or autistic, are usually asexual and very "profound and deep". For some reason, while I am neurodiversually distant, and gifted, I happen to be a "Stacy" in my talks sometimes, which to me kinda cancels out the whole point of being weird. During times where I don't want much sex, I act like a person who has difficulties socializing. But when I start my sexy talk, it goes like "Heyy wanna see my super gifted brain". It seems like as if having a sexual advantage nullifies being a person with no friends and no appreciation as a human. On the flip side of this, I get a lot of "smartness fetishists" who seem to treat me like a calculator sex toy. I don't blame them, because they usually don't see it. But I see. I am super good at calculating people and what is about to happen, so I get annoyed at society easily and become an outcast because it is too boring. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Holmbo Posted February 9, 2019 Share Posted February 9, 2019 I'm not sure I understand your topic. Maybe you could elaborate? Also, I thought stacy was just a term incels used? I've learned about it when I got that fenomen described but I've never seen it used in any other context. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eatingcroutons Posted February 9, 2019 Share Posted February 9, 2019 Yeah, I'm also not sure what you mean by "a Stacy" or what you're asking with your topic. I'd like to help but could you explain a bit more what you're struggling with? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeltaAro Posted February 10, 2019 Share Posted February 10, 2019 On 2/9/2019 at 4:42 PM, Holmbo said: Also, I thought stacy was just a term incels used? I've learned about it when I got that fenomen described but I've never seen it used in any other context. Never heard that term before. I found the following definition from RationalWiki: “Stacy is the archetype of a high-value, hypergamous slut and the female counterpart of Chad.” And Chad: “The man, the myth, the legend. Chad is the archetypal alpha bad boy;…” I'm getting kind of annoyed by such terms. Especially since they're designed to be slippery and vague (and therefore manipulative). If the leader of some local crime gang is alpha how can it be that he gets arrested by some normal cops? Also some women are simply named Stacy. On 1/22/2019 at 9:54 PM, yeshomonoromo said: One thing I noticed, is that most people who are sensitive, shy, weird, smart, nerdy, metal lovers, introverts, or autistic, are usually asexual and very "profound and deep". I'm weird in the sense that I can't keep my thoughts to myself and have a tendency to be a contrarian. A good opportunity to apologize to everyone I have offended here. PS: I don't really understand your post. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yeshomonoromo Posted February 12, 2019 Author Share Posted February 12, 2019 @DeltaV @eatingcroutons @Holmbo ouch, sorry. I guess not everyone understands these terms. Here is a more clear description, I hope it gets next time. Can being sexually attractive cancel out having a weird personality? Especially when that is my identity. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jot-Aro Kujo Posted February 12, 2019 Share Posted February 12, 2019 "Cancel out" in what way? Your personality is your personality. I'd still have the same personality even if I were a ghost possessing a toaster. The only way to change your personality is by actively working on your behavior, although idk what you mean by "weird" personality, and frankly as someone with a neurodevelopmental disorder myself I think "weird" is usually a derogatory label given by narrow-minded morons who can't handle someone being different from them. Better to find friends who aren't massive assholes than to try to mutilate your sense of self. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ApeironStella Posted February 13, 2019 Share Posted February 13, 2019 Okay so... Let me get this straight(lol)... You base your identity around being seen as the "weird, loner, smart, gifted one" and also use the "smartness factor" as a bargaining chip when you want to try to get a sexual partner, and also worry that acting as such is going against your "smart loner lonely mysterious kuudere TM" aura so that it might end up "nullifying your weirdness, which you see as a core part of yourself and don't want to be 'nullified'"? I'm sorry if this comes out harsh, as I sincerely don't mean any harm with this, but this whole thing comes off as being rather insecure with who you are and seeing some traits you have as a person as certain labels you cling to, which I can understand being a thing (especially in high school years/teenager years since I mean I had that phase too, like many others) and that question here really is that asking for confirmation that your self image of being someone gifted/special/weird/loner is still valid despite that going against how people who are seeking for sexual engagement is seen, since sexual attraction is something "shallow and not intellectual at all" by public view? There is nothing inherently "profound and deep" about being asexual on its own, it is simply related to one's sexual attraction levels- and sure, you can argue that what people might find "sexy" is bound to change with level of education/level of knowledge you have on human nature related areas, and I would agree that it probably has a hand or two in that, but aside from that, not really. You can be allosexual and have a great level of intelligence in any sort of area/gifted in one type of intelligence (not just typical math/logical intelligence- which also honestly is a whole another topic because you can be gifted in one area and absolutely suck in another, which is honestly human nature) or you can be someone who is not "gifted" in any kind of way but still be asexual. On "society being boring" topic, I truly do feel like that's something my teenage self would say because at the time I felt like no one really was aware of how messed up the world or humanity are, thinking I'm fooling people by acting different and weird and quirky but also knowing "how to manipulate people bc I'm so smart", so it is a sentiment I can sympathize with, but also a mindset that I find is rather unhealthy. People aren't that stupid, and just because you have different interests from them/neurodiversity doesn't mean you are any better or worse from them. You are you, and of course, you are the one who can decide what label fits your tendencies the best, but you don't have to be the "smartest, most aware, most calculative, always a step forward everyone else" to matter. That is not to say I think you are someone not as intelligent as you claim to be, you very well might be and if so, that's great that this is something you are aware of and can take pride in. This is just saying that, that is not your only value as a human being and that you don't have to clutch those labels to feel like you can only matter when you are acting accordingly to those labels- if you do feel sexual attraction/want to have sex, that doesn't mean this makes you any less "deep and mystical and intellectual", that just means that you simply feel sexual attraction. If you don't feel it, then that's okay too! It is not something that means you are broken in some way that you have to cover it with like "asexuals are deeper and more profound anyway" reasoning, is all I'm trying to say. I hope that I really didn't cross any borders here, and I apologize if I did so. I can delete this/ask a mod for this to be deleted if this is going against any of the rules or you feel discomfortable with this, I just wanted to chime in because given your other topic I've seen as well, that's what I personally picked up, and of course since I'm a random person on the internet I might have gotten this completely wrong- in which case, as I said, I will take back what I said. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Posted February 13, 2019 Share Posted February 13, 2019 On 1/22/2019 at 8:54 PM, yeshomonoromo said: One thing I noticed, is that most people who are sensitive, shy, weird, smart, nerdy, metal lovers, introverts, or autistic, are usually asexual and very "profound and deep". This sounds like some heavy stereotyping. There's also the complication that weird, nerdy and autistic people may be desexualised. Something which can also happen, to a lessor extent, with those who are shy or introverted. Thus may mistakenly believe they are asexual. On 1/22/2019 at 8:54 PM, yeshomonoromo said: On the flip side of this, I get a lot of "smartness fetishists" who seem to treat me like a calculator sex toy. I don't blame them, because they usually don't see it. IME fetishisation and desexualisation can happen to the same person. Especially to trans people. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yeshomonoromo Posted February 16, 2019 Author Share Posted February 16, 2019 On 2/13/2019 at 4:37 PM, ApeironStella said: Okay so... Let me get this straight(lol)... You base your identity around being seen as the "weird, loner, smart, gifted one" and also use the "smartness factor" as a bargaining chip when you want to try to get a sexual partner, and also worry that acting as such is going against your "smart loner lonely mysterious kuudere TM" aura so that it might end up "nullifying your weirdness, which you see as a core part of yourself and don't want to be 'nullified'"? I'm sorry if this comes out harsh, as I sincerely don't mean any harm with this, but this whole thing comes off as being rather insecure with who you are and seeing some traits you have as a person as certain labels you cling to, which I can understand being a thing (especially in high school years/teenager years since I mean I had that phase too, like many others) and that question here really is that asking for confirmation that your self image of being someone gifted/special/weird/loner is still valid despite that going against how people who are seeking for sexual engagement is seen, since sexual attraction is something "shallow and not intellectual at all" by public view? There is nothing inherently "profound and deep" about being asexual on its own, it is simply related to one's sexual attraction levels- and sure, you can argue that what people might find "sexy" is bound to change with level of education/level of knowledge you have on human nature related areas, and I would agree that it probably has a hand or two in that, but aside from that, not really. You can be allosexual and have a great level of intelligence in any sort of area/gifted in one type of intelligence (not just typical math/logical intelligence- which also honestly is a whole another topic because you can be gifted in one area and absolutely suck in another, which is honestly human nature) or you can be someone who is not "gifted" in any kind of way but still be asexual. On "society being boring" topic, I truly do feel like that's something my teenage self would say because at the time I felt like no one really was aware of how messed up the world or humanity are, thinking I'm fooling people by acting different and weird and quirky but also knowing "how to manipulate people bc I'm so smart", so it is a sentiment I can sympathize with, but also a mindset that I find is rather unhealthy. People aren't that stupid, and just because you have different interests from them/neurodiversity doesn't mean you are any better or worse from them. You are you, and of course, you are the one who can decide what label fits your tendencies the best, but you don't have to be the "smartest, most aware, most calculative, always a step forward everyone else" to matter. That is not to say I think you are someone not as intelligent as you claim to be, you very well might be and if so, that's great that this is something you are aware of and can take pride in. This is just saying that, that is not your only value as a human being and that you don't have to clutch those labels to feel like you can only matter when you are acting accordingly to those labels- if you do feel sexual attraction/want to have sex, that doesn't mean this makes you any less "deep and mystical and intellectual", that just means that you simply feel sexual attraction. If you don't feel it, then that's okay too! It is not something that means you are broken in some way that you have to cover it with like "asexuals are deeper and more profound anyway" reasoning, is all I'm trying to say. I hope that I really didn't cross any borders here, and I apologize if I did so. I can delete this/ask a mod for this to be deleted if this is going against any of the rules or you feel discomfortable with this, I just wanted to chime in because given your other topic I've seen as well, that's what I personally picked up, and of course since I'm a random person on the internet I might have gotten this completely wrong- in which case, as I said, I will take back what I said. Well, the weird/shy/loner people also think that they are superior on the basis that everyone wants sex and they don't. At least this is how to every person I know of. "In a world of Kardashians, be a Curie". Lol why not just be myself? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eatingcroutons Posted February 19, 2019 Share Posted February 19, 2019 On 2/16/2019 at 5:57 PM, yeshomonoromo said: Well, the weird/shy/loner people also think that they are superior on the basis that everyone wants sex and they don't. Ehh... that sounds like the sort of thing middle school kids might say to feel edgy. I wouldn't take anyone who actually believes that seriously. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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