Emerald Cheetah

The server is up and running officially and it's open to the public ☺️ It's currently 1 a.m, so I'm definitely going to bed after posting this. But, anybody, please tell me if u can join while I have my laptop closed. In the end, I could not find a reliable free way to keep it running 24/7 and be sure that it wouldn't lag. So, instead, I decided to pay for Shockbyte which should work while I'm not on my laptop. If you wish to add the server to your server list The current name (might change it when I wake up) is: Aspec Server IP address: 66.70.246.93:25626 If u don't care about adding the server, then u can just directly connect without the server name. To those who haven't read the previous messages, this server is running on Minecraft java. Sorry to anyone who only has windows 10 or some other version 😥

Oh okay! I'll extend the rule! omg, I just took forever writing a response because I thought u said "I don't like that rule" omg omg my eyes are failing meeee

Currently making the rule board. I don't want to forget anything important 😖 Any rules that y'all think I should add? Or any rules I have up here that I should modify?

I probably should've asked if y'all prefer java or windows 10, but I just went ahead and created a server on java since, from my experience, most people tend to have that more than windows 10. It's not public yet, because I have to create a rules board, and also figure out a way to make it public (I have an idea), and a bunch of other reasons. Buuuut, it might go up in a few days if I completely devote myself to it. I'm currently a college student on summer break, so I'll be pretty busy once the school year starts, but right now my time is quite free 🥰

Hello, Welcome 🥰 A QPR is a great idea! Though it's quite a struggle to find another person who u click with that also wants a QPR. Best of luck to ya :)

I often wonder about ways for the aro and ace communities to meet up when it feels like we're so few and far between. Tonight, an idea popped into my head. What if we created an aspec minecraft server! I'm not the most knowledgeable person when it comes to Minecraft, so I don't know if I would be confident in making and/or managing such a server. But I do know that Minecraft is really popular, therefore it'd be a great meeting place where we can create a virtual community 🙂 It would be a place where Aspecs can create together, chat about literally anything, and it's a great way to showcase your personality in a fun laid back environment. Ideally, this would be a server that's open 24/7 so that aspecs all around the world can visit as they please. This is all I've got for now. I'm curious to see what y'all think! Edit: Server name: Aspec Server (Actually I think u can call it whatever u want) server address: 66.70.246.93:25626

1.How do I feel about the little representation? Do I feel the representation is accurate? -Whenever I see aromantic representation, or a character has been confirmed to be aromantic, I always am really happy. From the media I've read and watched, it has been rather accurate. It's always appreciated whenever the word aromantic is used explicitly in the piece of media. A show that confirms their aromanticsm on the side is nice, but if the character says it that's the most ideal situation because it's raising awareness. I would like it if some media took more effort to show the struggles of aromantics, however. I don't want aromantics to look like gloomy people who are sad all the time, no no no. I simply want our struggles to be realized and sympathized with by others because that is something I feel like doesn't get communicated at all by most pieces of media with aromantics. We are shown as happy people who don't need romance to be happy. And while that can be true, it's not always true! Many aromantics often struggle to find their place in a world that so highly prizes romance and I want that to be shown and understood. It'd also be nice to show a range of romance repulsed to positive aros. I haven't seen many romance repulsed aros in the media, probably because they would receive more negative reactions from the viewers. Basically I'd like to see more varied aromantic representation. (Ya it's cool to use my comments on this project. I hope my thoughts are concise enough!)

based on what you've said, I would say only child since it sounds like you're not 100% biologically related to your other siblings. I suppose I should've specified in my question that I was looking for people to count only the siblings which they share both parents with when answering the birth order question. gahhhh, sorry about that.

chill

So I'm currently writing a two page paper for my sexuality class in college and I keep coming across this fraternal birth order effect. It basically says that with each brother born, under the same mother, there is a higher likelihood that they will be homosexual than the last one. It makes me wonder if this birth order effect could apply to any other sexualities or genders like aromanticism. It's a far stretch, but I have to say I'm curious. For me, I'm the youngest child and I only have 1 older brother. However, there is a 6 year age gap between me and my brother because my mom had 2 miscarriages in between soooo yeah, there's that. As for the second question, I don't know a single person in my family who is aro, ace, or lgbt+. Everyone in my family is cisgender heterosexual to a tee 😅 I'm curious to see if it's like this for others or if I'm just unlucky lol

I just finished reading "loveless" by Alice Oseman a couple weeks ago. It's about a character discovering that she is aroace, and also accepting and coming to terms with it. The book is amazing at showing off a diverse representation of characters. The whole cast of characters isn't white and there are other sexualities explored in the story as well. It was a real breath of fresh air to see aromanticism explored so deeply and this book got so soo many things right. I actually cried while reading one part near the end of the book because it described exactly what I wanted so perfectly. Another book with an aro character (though not nearly as great as Loveless, but I still enjoyed it) is "We go forward" by Alison Evans. This book is about two gals (one aroace, the other bisexual) becoming friends and going on a roadtrip together through Europe. It's rather short and sweet. And I'm a sucker for friendship so I love it.

Hello! I have to say that a lot of the things you said are very relatable to those on the aro spectrum. In high school/junior high I also made this conscious decision for myself that I wouldn't date for several reasons such as "I need to focus on school", "my school is small therefore there's no point in dating from such a small pool of options", and "high school sweethearts are statistically uncommon so what's the point?" etc. Sometimes I viewed love from a rather logical point of view which should've been a sign for me You appear to also be experiencing romance repulsion to a degree which is quite common in the aromantic community. Personally, I go crazy for gay romance, but if it's straight I will scrutinize it with all kinds of made up criteria in my head. I used to love Teen Fantasy and Adventure books, but the last time I wandered through that section searching for a book I found the word "romance/romantic" in the description of almost every book I picked up and it bothered me a lot. Then the one I bought had a romance that was ehhhhhh to me (with a sex scene that was even more ehhhhhh to me). Now I don't go through that section because I feel like it has betrayed me. Just give me beautiful platonic friendships in a novel plzz 😭 I haven't been asked out very often, so I don't have much experience to draw on concerning some of your points. However there was one time when I was asked out and it made me so uncomfortable. I said yes because I felt pressured to, but then the stress of a relationship made me break it off a few hours later. I literally couldn't stand the idea of being romantic with someone and the way he was acting towards me felt so wrong. I knew I couldn't reciprocate. I hope I was helpful in sharing my similar experiences with you

Hello Pieri! Welcome to the party 🙂 Make yourself at home. I totally feel ya on the rambling. I have a tendency to do the exact same thing 😅 A lot of us here also struggle with feelings of brokenness, myself included. The best remedy for this feeling is simply knowing that you're not alone. To always remember that there's a community of us who are here for you and probably can relate to what you're going through. However, an even better remedy would be to make some actual friends who are aro. Having at least one friend on the spectrum would definitely make anyone feel less alone and broken because then you can talk to them on a deeper level about aro stuff and whatnot. I have yet to form such a friendship, but I hope to someday.

I can't relate 100% because I am aromantic and not demiro, but I can relate with the feelings you have expressed. I also am not proud of my identity. Sometimes there are perks like avoiding relationship drama, and being free to pursue my own interests without having to consult a partner first. But I feel any pro to my identity has more cons to outweigh it. Sometimes I wish that I had any other romantic orientation besides aromantic just so I could at least have the smallest chance of finding someone. Sure, QPRs exist, but finding one is next to impossible and not every aromantic wants one. In our society, favor is given to the majority and the rest are left to fend for themselves (that's us). We are a source of pity for everyone else. How can we be proud when there is no path to happiness for us? Our generation has been given the task of forging that path ourselves and it is terrifying.