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Aromanticism and asexuality: born or become?


Born or become?  

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Do you feel that, on average, most people are born aromantic? Born asexual? Or are people more likely to become aromantic in the course of their lives? To become asexual? (Please note before you answer that this is not multiple choice.)

The option "It's sort of a mix" is open to interpretation, so feel free to add in the comments just how you interpret that response. It can be used to mean "Some people are born aromantic/asexual, while others can change from one orientation to another." It can mean "There is no obvious majority." It can mean "There is no real way to know." It can mean "These orientations are valid no matter how you come by them. It doesn't matter if you are born like this or not." There are other interpretations too, so share your own thoughts.

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I honestly have no clue. There’s not enough research on us yet for me to even have a feeling any which way. I was born like this, but the aspec community is so diverse.

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There's not nearly enough information out there about it, but I think that it's all perception. I'm sure that without societal expectations of what relationships were meant to be like, there would be a lot more aro people dating. It's weird to me that not every relationship is its own type of relationship in a way, ya know? Not to lean into the overly individualistic nature that the western world loves, but every situation is different but we have expectations for the foundation of a relationship. I should mention that I feel similarly about other sexual orientations. Everything is so fluid and being a human is impossible to categorize in the way that humans want to. That's why so many people are left questioning themselves over and over again. People change and that's what's so cool about people. If only we, as a society, could accept that lol.

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Hey guys! Been scoping out the website for a long time now and finally built up the courage to make an account! On this I would like to share my experience. I know that I was not born aroace I became it. I always tell people this story, when I was young I always tried to picture my ideal life, I was always the little one who saw princesses and castles I danced beautifully with a sharp suit surrounded by beautiful women. Now I try to do the same thing and, though in the same room in the same castle, I always dance alone, sometimes in a suit, sometimes in a dress. Though I can easily picture aroace from birth I know as a certainty that you can become it. 
 

That is my hot take and hope you enjoy the brief story! I hope it is readable too my grammar isn’t very good.

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I suppose it's both, considering there are a lot of things that you can both be born or become (aphants, savants, ect.), although there is often an incident or experience that lets people 'become' something.

Like @Neon and @CharredSkeever have said, there is nowhere near enough research to really know anything, plus, we have so little representation that there are probably lots of aros out there who don't, and quite possibly will never know about their orientation.

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As I said elsewhere, it's a mixture of both. In my case, it's become, but not by choice.

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