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EveryZig

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I found out about a day ago that aromantic without being asexual (or not entirely asexual) was a thing, and I realized it fit me really well. A week ago I started considering whether I was asexual, but I figure I would be more vaguely grey than anything, since I have some sex drive but have not had sex with a partner, pursued that, or had a strong urge to. (I feel like it would be worth trying at some point and I might like it, but in the same abstract sense that I might like learning to play in an instrument if I went through the effort.) In contrast, I don't think I have ever had romantic feelings (aside from one vague attraction in middle school I had for a few weeks and didn't have an urge to act on), so I feel like aromantic fits me much more clearly. When I was younger I figured that I was statistically likely to gain interest in dating and such at some point, but that never happened, and by now I think that is unlikely to change. Part of me still wonders whether I will eventually start being interested in romance, but another part of me replies that by the same logic maybe everyone is polyamorous pansexual but hasn't met the right people.

Before recently I had not thought about asexuality/aromanticism due to also having aspergers. I have known for a long time I have much less desire for social things than most people, but for years I just attributed it entirely to the aspergers. Having aspergers has also decreased the amount of social interactions in which my lack of romantic interest would be brought up. For example, I have never had a girlfriend/boyfriend don't think I have ever really had a crush, but I have also can't remember having ever been asked about those. Actually now that I think about it, I think that this first time I have really talked about my sexuality with anyone.

I am used to and don't really mind being unusual and knowing that other people have different drives than me (I do have insecurities but not about normality), but it is still nice to be able to compare somewhat similar experience with other people. I don't actively dislike romance, but I consider it one of the numerous things most people apparently want that I am not interested in doing myself (like playing/watching sports).

Anyway, things about me unrelated to romance/sexuality:

- I am a graduate student in biomedical engineering

- I am in my 20s

- I spend almost all my time outside of class or sleep on the computer (whether playing games, reading things, playing forum interactive story games, or recently writing one).

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