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EveryZig's Achievements


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  1. Honestly there isn't any reliable way to tell between people being disingenuous or being sincerely unusual, especially when over the internet. There is nothing so out there that you can be completely sure someone doesn't honestly believe it, and there is nothing so common or justified that there aren't people willing to deride it as "so absurd nobody would really believe it". From my perspective as an aspergers person, people do weird nonsensical stuff all the time and some of the things I do probably seems weird and nonsensical to them. I think some things really are rational or not, but making rules on a basis of "well of course I am obviously right and they are obviously wrong" has the same problems inherent in making rules on a basis of "well of course my views on religion are obviously right and others' are obviously wrong". Because of this, you can criticize the reasoning behind weird stuff but should not make rules against it unless you have evidence it is harming or intentionally deceiving anyone. (And when a claim is about someone's subjective emotional state, there's a limit of how much reasoning there can even be to criticize. I mean sure in this case there's logical arguments you can make about the nonexistence of souls or fate, but beyond that you get to the point of basically saying "no you don't really feel that way" as if you know the subjective experience of someone else better than they do.) Also, classifying "making the community look less legitimate" as a form of harm is essentially the logic of https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Respectability_politics. It can be (and frequently is) used by basically any minority to marginalize any less mainstream sub-minority (like those times when some aces want to exclude aro-aces because not feeling love is so weird don'tcha know, or how right now there are probably some LGBTQ people somewhere saying that of course everyone really has a sex drive even if they deny it and "asexuals" should stop making the LGBTQ community look like something tumblr dreamed up). I am not ok with that sort of thing.
  2. Kind of similar here. In terms of interacting with other people I am close to ace, but in terms of fantasies and porn I am into some pretty weird stuff.
  3. I have seen this come up in several other threads (in some cases as a derail), so I felt like this should have its own thread. Aros with Autism/Aspergers: what are your thoughts on how these interact and whether they are related? Personally, I am aro and have a clinical diagnosis of aspergers. Before hearing about aromanticism, I had thought that my not having romantic interest was caused by that, but now I am not as sure. As well as hearing that statistically autistic people are only somewhat more likely to be aro or ace, from looking at autistic/aspergers communities some I have seen what is (to me) a surprising amount of discussion about romance and the challenges faced by autistic people tying to find romance. (Really it makes me feel very lucky to be aro and grey-ace, as feeling a need for romance or partnered sex while having the social difficulties of the autistic spectrum seems like it would be awful.)
  4. Neat. I am not sure about the addblock one (I don't use addblock since people hosting the sites still need money), but that tab one is a thin I will try.
  5. Interesting study. I also noticed the article mentioned something called being single-at-heart, which when I follow the link on it seems to basically be a way of describing aromanticism before there was the word aromantic.
  6. Minor site suggestion: Would it be possible to have the Topics box on the main forum page list topics by who/when was the most recent post rather than by who/when was the thread start?
  7. Sometimes I feel like my non-interest in romance is an extension of a more general non-interest in other people.
  8. Hi! Glad to see a fellow aro aspergers nerd here. I am also interested in writing, though I have not had much time for it this semester.
  9. Been feeling weird lately due to being vaguely on the edge of LBGT, and with recent politics (especially here in North Carolina) feeling vaguely guilty about being sexually/romantically different in basically the safest way possible (experiencing sexual attraction without a need for actual sexual or romantic relations with others). I guess what I should do about it is see if there is any way to get involved in helping people who are worse off. Any advice on how to look into that as someone who lives on a college campus but does not have a car?
  10. He's already done a lot of things to be angry about, like calling all Mexicans rapists while having a history of sexual assault and bragging about it. As for not doing stupid things again, the problem is that the people who do those things don't know, distort or simply ignore history.
  11. I'd think it could be comparable to how someone can enjoy violent video games while being opposed to actual violence in real life. Enjoying something in a fictional form is often a very different thing from enjoying the real thing, especially if the fictional version is very unrealistic.
  12. This definitely describes my experience as well. Though in terms of sexuality, I don't even know what I would come out as, as I am in some vague space between ace and pan.
  13. Isn't it the case for all knowledge? Any fact is something that you could theoretically be mistaken on, and that could change in the future even if it is true. Nothing is completely, certain but some things are much more certain than others; so for the very certain things you treat them like facts until you have reason to believe they are not. In the same way that you can use reflected light to approximate the shape of your surroundings despite imperfect vision, you can use people's actions to approximate their future behavior despite imperfect knowledge of their intentions. As for why you would need to judge people, sometimes you need to decide who can or cannot be trusted with things like personal information, your money or your vote in an election. Binary has two meanings, and those two meanings cannot both always be applied to every situation where one is applied. For example, a binary option means an option in which there are two possible choices, and third options consisting of both or neither would be binary in the "binary compound" sense but no longer be binary in the "binary option" sense. Yes it can be ambiguous in some cases which meaning of a word with multiple meanings is being used, but language is just messy like that. Is it not possible to say "I do not think in terms of this system" without saying "this system is WRONG and I oppose it"? I do agree that genderqueer might be a more clear way of describing it, though I am not convinced nonbinary is as bad as you say. On transgender vs transsexual, from what I hear transgender is about gender identity while transsexual is about changing your physical sex, so a person might be transgender without having the financial/legal ability to become transsexual. Any phrase used as a label is a label and gains the flaws and benefits of being a label, including gaining a meaning beyond the literal meaning of the phrase. That's how language works.
  14. You can have a gender binary without everyone being 100% masculine or feminine. In a binary system, gender identities would be things like "Male + some amount of feminine traits" or "Female + some amount of masculine traits". Those identities would still be binary due to starting from one of two different templates (Male or Female) and then adding modifiers. In contrast, (as far as I can tell as a cis person) a nonbinary identity would be instead thinking of yourself as "Person + some masculine traits and some feminine traits" rather than starting from a binary template. Identifying as non-binary would mean being against binary categorization with respect to yourself specifically, but that doesn't mean being against other people having binary identities. Its like how being aromantic means not experiencing romantic attraction without necessarily meaning you don't think anyone else does or should.
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