Leistorm

This is low-key the funniest shit i've ever seen. I had something similar, actually. When I was a kid, my friends told me a boy had a crush on me and the first thing that came out of my mouth was "a rock??" because I seemed to associate the word "crush" with the literal crushing of my foot that happened by a rock when I was younger.

I'm an engineering aro lol. I'm in high school but plan on going into environmental engineering. And as it is known, women are a minority in stem. It's fun being the only queer girl in a room full of straight guys. My only queer female friend dropped engineering and took theater like no hate to the theater gays but come on we need more diversity. Anyone else relate? You and Wylan van Eck would be good friends, just an aro and a gay casually (KAZually) blowing shit up. If you understood that reference you're a real one

Some of my friends who know im aro do this as a joke but even after i came out to my parents they wouldn't stop bringing up the whole "when you get married etc etc" topic. I just tell them that whether I'm aro or not, it still makes me uncomfortable and they still need to respect that and refrain from doing that.

When I was like 14 I started questioning because I used to have crushes, but I had no desire to date them. Like, I was so sure that I had romantic attraction but just didn't see myself dating the object of attraction. Turns out it was platonic attraction and I completely messed up the definition of romantic attraction because nobody would bother to actually tell me what it was. "Hey what's a crush?" "Oh! Uh--it's--um--when you, like--your heart beats faster--you start stuttering--and--like--OH YOU'LL JUST KNOW" *tired aroace sigh*

I got a whole list here: Leo Valdez from Percy Jackson - aromantic heterosexual Reyna from Percy Jackson - confirmed asexual, headcannon aroace Frodo and Bilbo Baggins: Aroace Donnie, Rottmnt: Bi-angled aroace Krel, Trollhunters: Aroace, specifically romance-repulsed Willow Park, The Owl House: Pan-oriented aroace Hunter, The Owl House: Bi-angled aroace (demi-aroace) Hiro Hamada, Big Hero 6: Aroace Merida, Brave: Aroace Elsa, Frozen: Lesbian-oriented aroace Isabela Madrigal, Encanto: lesbian-oriented aroace Jack Frost, Rise of the Guardians: aroace Mercutio, Romeo and Juliet: aroace, romance-repulsed Katniss Everdeen, Hunger Games: hetero-oriented aroace Blitz and Hearth, Magnus Chase: in a QPR??? Pidge, Voltron: aroace

Never Been in Love - Will Jay Version of Love - Will Jay People Watching - Conan Gray Crush Culture - Conan Gray Crush - Glades FRIENDS - Anne-Marie, Marshmello Not a Love Song - Bülow (aroallo) Here - Alessia Cara

I have a whole TBR and a ton of books with aspec characters: Summer Bird Blue - Akemi Dawn Bowman (aroace) Firebreak — Nicole Kornher-Stace (tech, VR, aroace) To Be Taught, If Fortunate — Becky Chambers (sci-fi, space, ace, queer) Beyond the Black Door — A.M. Strickland (aroace) Baker Thief — Claudie Arsenault (aroallo, genderfluid) City of Strife — Claudie Arsenault (demiro SC, aroace SC) Elatsoe — Darcie Little Badger (aroace, Native American rep) A Snake Falls to Earth — Darcie Little Badger (ace, Native American rep) Royal Rescue — A. Alex Logan (aroace MC, medieval Europe, cozy)

I'm really good at romantic scenes. My allo friends who are avid romance readers can vouch for me. But I have a hard time developing it realistically because I don't know how the pacing works. Is it too rushed? Too slow? This is one thing I have to consult my allo friends on. But I read and write fantasy with romance as a side-plot (contemp romance is annoying and I don't like when romance is the central focus, which is why I prefer books like Percy Jackson, Six of Crows, etc) so I have some exposure. I sort of evade the boundaries of "romantic vs platonic" because I establish intimacy between characters no matter the type of relationship. People could interperet my female MC and her male friend's relationship as semi-romantic if they weren't an aroace woman and a gay man. That's how it should work. The people in question determine their relationship, not labels and standards held up by societal norms. But I cannot, for the life of me, describe sexual attraction (needless to say I can't write smut because I'd just cringe and slam my laptop shut before I even touch the keyboard). Which makes it difficult to write characters who are asexual because that would mean implying that sexual attraction does in fact exist in other characters who are not asexual. That's the difficult part and I'll need a lot more guidance on that. This is why asexual representation is so hard to find in media, because you'll still have to mention sexual stuff to talk about the absence of it. Most media, at least for younger audiences, try to avoid it. But even between my allo characters, I won't write sex. I'm probably going to avoid even implying that they had sex. I'll just say "oh it's a time period where the culture is to to wait till marriage" or some garbage excuse lol (it might work though since it's a fantasy).

Dragons. If I could draw, I'd draw a dragon with the aro or aroace flags.

I was still ace but knew what aromantic meant. I used to have platonic attraction but mistook it for romantic which is why I believed I was ace but not aro. One night I was watching ace tiktoks and sorta wandered into the aro side and started relating to them and that was sorta my "Oh, shit" moment. But this happened over the course of a few months when I was still working out my different attractions.

People describing you as ace and not mentioning aro is so relatable. like one of my classmates actually acknowledged that im aromantic and it seriously made my day. like math class got instantly better when he said that lmao

Lmao whenever I was asked to describe my "ideal partner" I'd always describe my ideal best friend (I just described my closest friend since she's ideal enough for me) Also people made such a huge deal out of those sex ed lessons. I feel like if everyone was a little more mature about it, I would've felt less awkward. I can't tell if being ace made me extremely mature because I don't understand the important of sex, or if it made me more awkward about things like this. Depends on the situation.

Venom - Smash into Pieces Out of Here - Smash into Pieces Conquer - Ruelle (she's so underrated) War of Hearts - Ruelle Soldier - Tommee Profitt, Fleurie (she's also criminally underrated) Die for You - STARSET The One Who Laughs Last - Downplay (later became STARSET) Jericho - Celldweller Override - Zardonic Outside - Calvin Harris, Ellie Goulding Animal - Vicetone If you're looking for aspec songs: Never Been in Love - Will Jay Crush - Glades Crush Culture - Conan Gray People Watching - Conan Gray Not a Love Song - Bulow FRIENDS - Annemarie, Marshmello Version of Love - Will Jay

The worst initial response I've gotten when I said I'm lgbtq+ in general is my mom not talking to me for two weeks. Just. Stopped acknowledging my presence. Being aro I guess she's ok with since that means I won't be dating anyone, but she doesn't like the affiliation to the lgbtq+ community. The best, other than my queer friends being supportive, was by a very nice classmate I've known for years. He seems to be your confused but supportive straight guy. But a while ago I mentioned in our French class that "I don't experience romantic love, but platonic bonds are important to me". Note that I did not use the aromantic label because it was in French class and I don't know the word for that. Also, I wanted to keep it a little more subtle instead of screaming "I'm LGBT". But then the very next day, the very nice classmate and I were having a conversation and he said casually, "So, since you're aro, you've probably experienced this differently, but..." and I don't remember what we were talking about, but I remember the pure joy I felt that this dude knew I was aro without me having to give him a huge powerpoint presentation. He's always been one of my favorite people, despite us not being very close, but this only made me like him more. Like, he used that brain for three seconds and realized, "Ohhh, she's aro". And he made sure he mentioned the aromantic label specifically so that I can feel visible/validated. Why can't more people be like this? It takes no more than ten seconds of thought and possibly a couple of google searches. Instead of me having to exhaust myself trying to explain my identity for the tenth time that week. Hella green flag, his girlfriend is lucky fr.

I'm not sure if anyone else said this yet, but I feel like my asexuality and my aromanticism are so separated that I tend to "favor" my aro identity over my ace one. Like, obviously I can't imagine having sexual attraction and all, but I feel like being aro has impacted me more. Like, if I were just ace, everyone'll be like "Oh thats cool but you still have crushes right??" but then if I say I'm aro they'll be like "Oh...so you just...don't get crushes??" Cue awkward stammering and trying not to offend me but failing miserably. My asexuality hasn't really made me feel ostracized from everyone else, yk? Since I'm young and most of my peers aren't that worried about sex (can't say the same about sex jokes though). But everyone talks about romance and dating and I'm just here like "guys...aro here...ask me about my aro experiences pls i'm desperate..." Also I really like the word "ace" and saying "Oh yeah I'm ace" just sounds so cool.

I can't tell if I'm afamilial or just traumatized. I don't have the best relationship with my parents. Like, we get along mostly, but it's still really strained because they think they know me, but they really don't. Other than my brother, I've never had much of a bond with my parents. I get really emotional when I'm with my mom and we actually get along, because I'm afraid I'm going to mess it up and make our relationship even worse. Again, I feel like it's because of the trauma. I try not to think about this too much.

I'm Indian and my dad thinks he's open-minded and such, but he's not really. When I was closeted, I'd mention something about the lgbt community or I'd wear my rainbow pin and he'd be like "You should focus on school, teenagers are too young to think about sexuality". My mom is just plain homophobic/transphobic. You know how we have those moments when we're closeted and arguing with our parents about lgbt rights and they're like "Why do you care so much?" and we just freeze and stop talking? It happened one too many times and I just got tired of it. So that was how I came out a few weeks ago. My dad kept telling me that wearing my pin only makes the queer community feel MORE ostracized. So I told them, "I'm literally part of the lgbt community. I'm aromantic. That's why I wear my pins." and my dad didn't bring it up because I guess he's chill with me identifying as aro/queer, he just wants me to put it aside and focus on school. Understandable, but I can't just ignore an integral part of myself. My mom just. Stopped talking to me. For two weeks (though it felt more like two months, I'm not even kidding, I checked a calendar and nearly got whiplash from turning my head to the invisible camera) she just gave me the silent treatment. My friends told me to give it time. But she started talking to me NOT because she came around and accepted me, but because she basically forced me to agree that I wouldn't talk about being lgbt in front of anyone ever (too late though, I've been out to a few of my teachers and most of my friends/classmates for years). I agreed because I'm hella traumatized and can't stand the silent treatment. Over the years she always said things like "When you get married and have kids etc etc" and I always wanted to claw at my skin, even before I knew I was aroace. I just felt so exposed and unlike myself. Indian parents always push that expectation of getting married and having kids onto us without ever considering the possibility that not everyone wants that. When I came out, it was weird. My mom was chill that I'm aro, but as soon as I say I'm lgbt, she's like "why do you have to do this?" Do what? Exist? She's fine with me not being attracted to anyone, but she doesn't like it when I wear my aroace and rainbow pins because "Our family's reputation!!" Problem is, I don't give a shit about reputation. Which basically goes against Indian parents' mindset. So you can see why I feel like a bit of a huge disappointment. I feel like being aroace means you don't have that much of a "bad rep" compared to other queers like gay ppl or trans ppl. At least, that was my experience growing up with Indian parents. I'm not into boys, which means I won't date them. I'm not into girls, which means I'm not gay (which is a relief to my homophobic mother). Being aro means I can focus on school. So then it's hard for me to say I identify as LGBT because then they're hit with that realization moment of "Oh, right. She's one of them." Hell, my younger brother has even told me I'm not LGBT because not being attracted to anyone "doesn't count" and that every kid feels this way. For reference, he's in middle school and I'm in high school. I've identified as aroace for a good four years now. My brother didn't know what the lgbt community meant until I explained it to him about a month ago. He acts like he's a total expert, and it's so satisfying to humble him. But anyways, I feel like I sorta dodged a bullet by being aroace instead of gay or genderqueer. And I can guarantee that if my mom knew what the word queer meant and the history behind it, she would definitely use it against me as a slur. I mentioned that I might very likely have ADHD and she started calling me "ADHD girl" as if that were the funniest thing in the world. So I wouldn't put it past her to call me queer as a slur.

Aw yiss it's that time of year again!! i went out and bought myself discount chocolate yesterday, since it was the day after valentines day and all lol ive been thinking of writing a satirical "ultimate guide" to surviving as an aroace lol