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What aspects of being aro would you like to see presented in fiction?


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On 5/15/2017 at 5:55 AM, Ice Queen said:

Romance is a type of attraction, which means it appears involuntarily, sometimes out of nowhere. It is accompanied by symptoms varying from one person to another, symptoms such as butterflies in the stomach, nervousness around the person, increased heart rate, blushing, pallor, loss of appetite, giddiness, and so on. If it is a crush, it can happen that one crushes on someone they don't know at all. It's like that spark people describe. They don't know the person, yet for inexplicable reasons, they can't help but feel an intrinsic desire to pursue a relationship with the person in question. The symptoms are present, too, but not to that high a degree. Romantic attraction basically means anything from crushing to falling and being in love with someone for a while.


A squish is like a desire to become close with someone. The desired bond can vary from friends to best friends, and so on. As for queerplatonic feelings, well, I do experience such feelings at the moment. To me, it is like a BFF (best friends forever) upgrade. I have strong feelings, but my body doesn't react at all because there's nothing chemical about it. It all developed based on what I know about the person, on a strong bond that formed naturally over time. Simply put, that person turned out as worthy of a special place in my heart. So these feelings go beyond typical friendship, but they are born out of it.


What kind of connection do you desire with that friend? Best friends, or partners? If it is the latter, I have a thread in which I tried to explained the differences between being in love (aka romantic attraction) and, love without that attraction, as we, aromantics, experience it: http://www.arocalypse.com/forums/topic/960-compare-and-contrast/



Hope I didn't baffle you xD. 



Ooo, thank you. *clicks link*

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On 11/05/2017 at 4:59 PM, Holmbo said:

I've been thinking before that it would be interesting to read an historic novel with an aromantic main character. Like maybe a woman who lives in a time where her only expectation is to marry and she doesn't want it at all and is trying to figure out another option.

Historically marriages would typically be arranged or "marriage of convenience".
With it being unclear how strong the "expectation to marry" was in practice. It may have been much easier being aro in the past.
I'm guessing you had someone in mind other than Elizabeth Tudor in mind for a main character :)

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Frustration about being aromantic? I know everyone gets tired of that trope of angsting about how queer you are and how everything sucks, but I'd still like a story where an aromantic character does struggles with that aspect of themself in relation to the rest of world. It can be lonely when you're left of out of romance (not that you want it) when romantic love is a major part of society and culture. I also want close relationships are that explicitly platonic. Plus, I'd love to see a character just point-blank come and out and say "hey I'm aromantic". Also aromanticism in relation to asexuality and the rest of the LGBTQIA community and how they mesh together or don't at times.

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  • 2 months later...
On 12/05/2017 at 1:54 PM, Ettina said:

Sounds very interesting. 


I know in many places, a woman like that might find her place as a nun. But not every woman had the option of being a nun (eg if they're Protestant, or if their family insists on them marrying for political reasons).


Incidentally, the webcomic Heartless features an aroace woman in Victorian times who gets turned into a vampire. It touches on some of those themes, especially right at the start.        

Oh this just jogged a memory for me! I read a great detective novel about a young mother superior in a female led joint convent/monastary (based on historical fact, it was a real group that was for married couples who wanted to join the church together). She was smart and kind and caring but no romance or sex as far as I can remember from any of the nuns or monks. I'll have to hunt to find the name of the book and author.......


everything that everyone has said would be awesome to read one day! I think the biggest thing I would want to see is something dealing with the harm non-acknowledgement and erasure can do, and perhaps link it to other erasures in the past that are now universally condemned (like lesbians don't exist and the holocaust didn't happen)

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