Is it normal/valid if, despite being aroace, my favorite genre is romance?

[Guest Dynn33]

Im questionning if im aroace for a while now, im getting older ive never had any meaningful romantic relationships (or sexual, I dont think creepy weird experimenting when i was younger counts as sexual relations) tmi, and ive only had maybe 2 squishes in my entire life, yeaaaaars ago, I havent experienced any crushes or attractions at all in a lot of times, anyway, thats no the topic of today : Is it normal / or valid if Im obsessed with the romance genre? I think aroace people usally dislike it or find it annoying, but i love reading about it I love watching all kinds of shows, kdramas and movies it makes me laugh and imagine what it would be like to be in love, I like the idea of love but ive never experienced it and the idea of being in a relationship makes me sick and uncomfortable, im perfectly content with being single im not sad about it or anything. Is it just me? Is it weird? 

[dewy]

Yes, I've always loved romance in fiction and shipping and that didn't change when I found out I was aro. It's not weird, there's a variety of aros and while some of us might not like romantic fiction, some of us really love it, just maybe not in real life.

[Jot-Aro Kujo]

You can do whatever you want forever

[Mult]

Stories are just stories. We read them for entertainment, so whatever genre you enjoy doesn't mean you want something like that for yourself. Most people wouldn't want to be chased by a murderer or tortured, but horror and thrillers are very popular genres anyway. 

Personally romance is a hit or miss for me. I can find them entertaining or annoying depending on the characters and themes. A lot of romance stories are far removed from reality anyway with fantastical or unlikely situations or circumstances. 

I actually really enjoy stories where the romance doesn't happen. I liked the side story in the video game Hades where you, as Zagreus, can pursue a romance with a character named Dusa but she ends up realizing that her crush on him wasn't actually of a romantic nature and she would rather be friends. This storyline can only happen if you choose to pursue Dusa romantically, so I will choose romance scenarios to get a story that I like or prefer. Similar situation in Undertale with Papyrus where I will always choose the date option because Papyrus ultimately just wants to be friends. I really love this and I would like more stories like that. 

[Kristoph]

Of course it is valid. Each aro person experiences their aromanticism in a different way. I personally don't experience romantic attraction at all and I'm rather repulsed by idea of involving myself in any romantic relationship, but I'm an active shipper and I enjoy writing about my favorite ships – I think that saying that about 90% of my fanfiction is romance wouldn't be any exaggeration. Also, human's brain is simply a very weird place – while you may enjoy something in fiction, it may be a complete "no" for real situations (notice, for example, how many people love the horror genre).

[The Newest Fabled Creature]

I do find it that lot's of aspec people don't like romantic and/or sexual media, and it can be liberating to talk about that dislike or disconnect, which can lead into emotional and important topics associated with amatonormativity and allonormativity. All of that is completely valid! But, it's also 100% valid to like those kinds of media, too! I'm aroallo and I still love romantic genres (although, I am quite picky), and sometimes I ship characters romantically more than platonically, or queerplatonically (unless a character is blatantly aspec, then I ship them queerplatonically with others). There's nothing that makes you any "less" aroace, like how me loving romance every once in a while doesn't make me any less aro. Think of it as this: if you don't consider other aspecs any less because of the media they consume, then that means you're not any less for the media you consume.

[Kristoph]

5 hours ago, The Newest Fabled Creature said:

I still love romantic genres (although, I am quite picky), and sometimes I ship characters romantically more than platonically, or queerplatonically

I personally dislike it when there's canon romance in works of another genres – especially when it's heteronormative romance that is pushed down your throat and I'm really, really picky about ships. Someone would think that because most of my ships are slash then I ship anything between two (or more) male characters, but I don't. There are many ships (and tropes) I just can't stomach.

[Neon]

Aromantic just means little to no romantic attraction. It has nothing to do with interest in romance, whether that's fictional, or in real life.

I'm picky about romance personally, but I can absolutely enjoy it, and I'm certainly still aromantic!

[Ekaterina]

8 hours ago, Nagito said:

I personally dislike it when there's canon romance in works of another genres – especially when it's heteronormative romance that is pushed down your throat and I'm really, really picky about ships. Someone would think that because most of my ships are slash then I ship anything between two (or more) male characters, but I don't. There are many ships (and tropes) I just can't stomach.

I am the complete opposite, I most of the time am not interested in romance-centric stories but like some romance subplots in different kinds of stories, where it's just one of the many aspects of life and one of many ways to care and not the center of the world, just like it should be. I don't like most of the cases where romance is everything a character's conflict and story is about (unless it's purposedly written this way to deconstruct it), I like when people just go well together whether as friends or romance, and I am okay when a romantic subplot is a part of a character's journey of overcoming deeper issues/fixing their flaws/finding themselves. 

[The Newest Fabled Creature]

14 hours ago, Nagito said:

I personally dislike it when there's canon romance in works of another genres – especially when it's heteronormative romance that is pushed down your throat and I'm really, really picky about ships. Someone would think that because most of my ships are slash then I ship anything between two (or more) male characters, but I don't. There are many ships (and tropes) I just can't stomach.

I get that. Two of my most favorite fantasy book series ever (Daughter of Smoke & Bone by Laini Taylor and Red Queen by Victoria Aveyard) does have that heternormative-it-really-doesn't-have-to-be-there romances. They are great fantasy examples, don't get me wrong, where DOSB has Chimera, Seraphim, resurrection, and soul magic, and Red Queen has revolutionary-people-with-powers shit - both I do believe are worth it to read, but the romances are only really good for the side characters? Like, the main characters in DOSB have a very soulmate type romance which is somewhat stomachable in how it's written, but I do see that trope a lot and get tired of it sometimes, and Red Queen's main characters are very unstable and I feel like should've had way more time to be by themselves and to heal. Both series' side character romances I was way more invested in, to be honest, and especially Red Queen's who has some queer relationships that feel way more organic then the straight ones.