Jealousy

[alto]

My squish just told me that he has asked a girl out on a date, and she said yes.  I feel a bit jealous.  Does this mean I am no longer aro?

[Erederyn]

Well, do you think you're experiencing jealousy because you might have romantic feelings for your squish/friend? Experiencing some romantic attraction doesn't automatically mean you're no longer aro (that's why aromanticism is a spectrum!). But you can also experience jealousy over friendships, so it doesn't necessarily signal that you have romantic feelings for your squish. Perhaps you worry that this girl might end up taking up more of his time and attention and that you'll potentially become less important, which can trigger feelings of jealousy. Or maybe the jealousy is indeed because you have some romantic feelings and this is now becoming clearer. But even if you are jealous because you do have some romantic feelings for your friend, you can still be aro if you feel that it still describes you and your experiences!  

[Apex]

I've been jealous of friends' relationships when I had 0 romantic feelings myself, it happens.

[alto]

How do I tell if I have romantic feelings for my friend, vs the scenarios described above?

[Holmbo]

54 minutes ago, alto said:

How do I tell if I have romantic feelings for my friend, vs the scenarios described above?

Do you want to be in a romantic relationship with them?

[alto]

Do I want to kiss them?  Not really.  Bleh.

[arofox]

On 12/6/2021 at 7:46 PM, Apex said:

I've been jealous of friends' relationships when I had 0 romantic feelings myself, it happens.

I definetly agree with this. If you have a squish you want to be special to that person in a way and spend time with them. Thats why you sometimes get jelous when they spend time with other people. It doesn't have to mean anything romantic :)