Louis On Air Posted May 12, 2016 Share Posted May 12, 2016 Once upon a time, there was a man living alone in the woods. The man was lonely. People said he should get into a romantic relationship, but he knew that that wouldn't help him. So he got into a car. He decided he would drive around the country, searching for people he could become friends with. Unfortunately, he never got his driver's license, so he was a terrible driver. But he drove anyway. And then, a magical moose appeared on the road. (Yes, I'm Canadian) He ran over the moose. (Yes, I'm American) He then put the dead moose into the boot of his car. And he became friends with the dead moose. He and the moose went everywhere in their wonderful QPR. People thought that their relationship was unnatural, and everyone they met was very vocal about this. But he knew that he could bring the moose back to life if he just found the holy Celtic Sheep of Life. (Yes, I'm Welsh) He just needed to travel around the world to find the 5 mystical keys to unlock the holy Celtic Sheep of Life's sanctuary. The man walked into the local tavern, looking for clues about the Mystical Witch who was rumored to be in possession of the first key. He saw a shady looking fellow sitting in the corner. He was round and pale yellow, with lots of small spots and a stout body shape, almost like a potato! The person introduced themself as Spud and proceeded to tell the man about the upcoming Spudpocalypse. After a long discussion, he finally learned the whereabouts of the Mystical Witch- The city of Copenhagen- and to get her help he would have to be on the right side of the Arocalypse Spudpocalypse which Spud seemed to know more about than he was letting on! I Spud agreed to give some information, but only after our protagonist solved three tricksy riddles. Spud's first riddle was "everyone who has me believes that everyone has me. Everyone who finds me believes I cannot be lost. Everyone who believes me knows I cannot be trusted. Everyone who relies on me is doomed. But I am no one except for that I am created by everyone who wants me. What am I?" "A Dalek," said the man after much thought. "No! Not everyone has a Dalek and who would believe a Dalek in the first place. You need to realise the monumental influence of peoples' perception if you want to get anywhere on this quest," the potato cried "try again-" 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dodgypotato Posted May 13, 2016 Share Posted May 13, 2016 "I can't deal with all this strain on my brain," he rhymed as he attacked spud. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zema Posted May 13, 2016 Share Posted May 13, 2016 It turns out that spud had one of the keys! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
omitef Posted May 13, 2016 Share Posted May 13, 2016 He tried to take the key from Spud. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dodgypotato Posted May 13, 2016 Share Posted May 13, 2016 But Spud turned into their final form: the Great Demonic Roasted Potato of Doom (GDR-PoD)! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zema Posted May 13, 2016 Share Posted May 13, 2016 The man only had one option, he had to eat spud! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spud Posted May 13, 2016 Author Share Posted May 13, 2016 Unfortunately, being that Spud was invincible and almighty, when he tried to stab Spud with a fork, it just dinked off the side and Spud let out a mighty Roar of the Roasted Potato. (If this is a picture book too, here is the Roasted Potato of Doom): 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DannyFenton123 Posted May 13, 2016 Share Posted May 13, 2016 Before the man could do anything else, they were arrested by the police for armed assault with a fork. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Louis On Air Posted May 13, 2016 Share Posted May 13, 2016 After they were put in the police car, Spud broke off all the doors so the he and the man could jump out but only after 10 minutes of driving so that they were in a mysterious part of town. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zema Posted May 14, 2016 Share Posted May 14, 2016 Turns out the policeman was deaf, so he didn't hear the loud bang caused by the doors breaking off. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DannyFenton123 Posted May 14, 2016 Share Posted May 14, 2016 However, he did have eyes on the back of his head! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dodgypotato Posted May 14, 2016 Share Posted May 14, 2016 But the man was hungry after failing to eat Spud so he ate the policeman with eyes in the back of his head (he tasted like iecream). 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Louis On Air Posted May 14, 2016 Share Posted May 14, 2016 Spud was very impressed and so he agreed to give the man his key and help him find the witch who owned the next key. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dodgypotato Posted May 14, 2016 Share Posted May 14, 2016 They travelled to the mystical land of Adelaide, Australia, where the witch was rumoured to be. (*cough* my old English teacher *cough*) 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zema Posted May 14, 2016 Share Posted May 14, 2016 It was here that they met spud's counterpart, dodgypotato! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Louis On Air Posted May 14, 2016 Share Posted May 14, 2016 The man was confused and asked "didn't you say the witch was in Copenhagen?" 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zema Posted May 14, 2016 Share Posted May 14, 2016 "I lied because I didn't know I could trust you then, but after seeing you eat that policeman I know that I can" said spud. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Louis On Air Posted May 14, 2016 Share Posted May 14, 2016 The man found that statement incredibly convenient. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dodgypotato Posted May 14, 2016 Share Posted May 14, 2016 But accepted it, because dodgypotato (the incredibly sexy beast they are) confirmed that Spud was telling the truth. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Louis On Air Posted May 14, 2016 Share Posted May 14, 2016 Wanting to get a move on, the man asked "So where is this witch/english teacher anyway? And wouldn't it make more sense to be in New South Wales seeing as the Holy Celtic Sheep is welsh?" 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spud Posted May 14, 2016 Author Share Posted May 14, 2016 Spud replied, "Relax. The story doesn't have to make sense! It makes dollars! Oh, and the witch is in that conveniently placed haunted house across the street." 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Louis On Air Posted May 14, 2016 Share Posted May 14, 2016 "Oh, ok," the man replied "let's go in now!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zema Posted May 15, 2016 Share Posted May 15, 2016 "wait," said spud, "before we enter we have to perform the ritual" 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spud Posted May 15, 2016 Author Share Posted May 15, 2016 "Ritual? You never mentioned this! Actually, you didn't mention anything, so I'm not surprised," said the man. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DannyFenton123 Posted May 15, 2016 Share Posted May 15, 2016 "We must eat 42 tubs of our favourite ice cream flavour whilst touching this door!" Spud explained. "Where's the nearest supermarket?" 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.