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Lonely Lithromantic


Fishboy
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Hey there, folks. For privacy reasons, I'll introduce myself to you all as Fish. For a really long time, I've gone through hell due to being lithromantic. I've lost feelings for people I honestly wanted to be with, and watched them slowly stop caring for me as I became irrelevant to them. There have been times where I refused to tell someone I had feelings for them solely because I didn't want to go through the run-around again. So, after years of unhappy relationships, I realized that I wasn't an asshole, I wasn't a freak, because I'm lithromantic. 

       This was a breath of relief for me, as now I knew that I wasn't alone. However, despite my newfound identity, I still felt lonely. So, rather than hurl myself back into the dating scene, I thought it would be better to take some time for myself to think about who I am, what I want. After a few months, I decided that being with someone who's Aromantic would work out for in terms of who I am (Lithromantic). However, I could honestly never find a place where I could find someone who was Aromantic, until now.

             So, now that I've found this website, I realize that I'm at a loss. I have no knowledge of how to act in a relationship with someone who's aromantic. Excuse me for getting a bit lewd, but I'm a sexual person who enjoys that side of themselves, but I don't know if that would be right for my possible partner. I have a lot of questions, but am willing to listen to many different viewpoints. If you can point me in the right direction to find someone, I would be tremendously appreciative, and if anyone's interested, send me a message here or on twitter @rotted_fish

thank you so much for reading this. If I've posted this in the wrong forum, I'm very sorry, but I just needed to voice my opinions.

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Lewd is fine. There are discussions of that here. I don't know of lithromantics on the forum off the top of my head, but the search bar should have an advanced search option that can search for that. I'm sure there's some folks around who have shared that experience. 

 

Also, since you don't have a welcome/intro thread elsewhere, welcome to arocalypse!

Your customary ice cream is here :aroicecream:

Enjoy your stay!

 

P.S. I volunteer at an aquarium. Fish have my approval :D

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There are a variety of different sexualities running around this place, generally on the weekend so your topic is perfectly timed for more people to notice and comment. I guess the fact that there are few of us spread quite widely would probably be an issue for you. There aren't nearly as many aromantic meet ups as there are asexual ones (and those ones would be wholly unhelpful to you). All aros seem to be different, so being in a relationship with one will be individual to who they are, but I guess communication is the key in navigating the murky sea of romance repulsions or indifference. 

 

also if you are in a really specific sharing mood you can always write trigger warning everywhere then put in a spoiler by putting your lewd graphic descriptions as such [*spoiler] description of a cockroach [*/spoiler] just remove the * from both square bracketed things. 

and here is a functioning spoiler

TW: dead dove do not eat

Cockroaches are bugs that make aweful crunching noises when you step on them when you get up to pee in the night

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@Fishboy

 

there are certainly aromantic folk who are sexual. so your idea of hoping for an aromantic sexual partner isn't crazy hehe! and some greyromantics might not bother your lith nature. er, does that make sense to say?

 

it's also possible some romantics who understands lithromanticism and are willing, might be able to keep their romantic feelings out of the behavior of the relationship. I dunno how to explain what I mean... basically, the way that I am greysexual is that I feel sexual feelings towards a partner but don't really want sex and just generally don't mind enjoying feeling my feelings quietly. While I would not be comfortable with a partner being unaware I'm sexually attracted to them, beyond them beying like "oh that's sweet" when I let em know the one time, I wouldn't need to mention it or to do anything about it or to tell them or anything. so an asexual who isn't bothered by sexual attraction itself, like don't mind "being sexy" to someone, they might start to notice my feelings but, I won't be very charged or active about them. just generally behave platonic about them. such a relationship would work for me. it's possible something like that where, the romantic person is perfectly happy enjoying their attraction without talking about it or giving you romantic attention might be someone you're comfortable with? food for thought, basically.

 

 

appreciate the fire emblem avatar, a fan myself :D

 

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