HelloThere

Hey btw Keith I’m wondering, just tell me if I’m wrong but are you in early high school? I read one of your posts and it kinda hinted at you being younger, I was just wondering since I’m like 15 years old I could talk and see how you knew for sure you were aro.

Probably Mercury, it’s got the perfect amount of materials to make a Dyson Swarm, a massive amount of solar satellites providing literally infinite energy from the sun. It’s a perfect candidate for that really, it’s close to the sun, most chemicals on that planet have been burned away, the only big issue is volcanoes, solar flares, and heat. This man is talking facts. Like whenever someone says “oh that’s so gay” I’m like “bro, if you pull this bs anymore I may literally punch you, the only thing holding me back is pity for your ignorance.”

That’s actually pretty cool! I kinda came out to some of my friends but I never said I was, I just said I’m suspicious I am. XD i’m not really sure I’m old enough to and the only way for me to be really 100% sure in my dumb mind is to date and see if I feel anything. But here’s the kicker, I wouldn’t date anyone other than a close friend and it’s still be awkward explaining the actual purpose of said date because otherwise I’d be just some jerk for using this person as a romantic test subject. So yeah that’s a real pickle right there. And I’m only fifteen so I have no way to be sure! I know that identifying is not permanent but I want it to be set in stone because I can’t mentally handle being wrong after over a month of suspicions.

I think that the only time was unintentional by my dad, I don’t even fully remember what he said but whenever I had tried to drop a hint on possibly being aro by asking “why most villains have little to no romantic attraction in movies.” He sorta responded by basically saying (this was only what I remembered take it with a grain of salt) that not having some form of love makes you more likely to be a villain. This was just very paraphrased so please this may be completely different. My point is though that most of my life I haven’t been grilled much about relationships but I can imagine that becoming an issue later on in life as I’m only 15.

I’m not gonna say my name online so just whatever the frick you want but I’m he/him and am possibly aro, maybe a little ace not sure but I’m like 15 so I’ll know for sure maybe by the end of high school?

I haven’t done that yet but there is this one guy in my class that I thought I had a crush on (he’s the same gender so that’s just extra confusing to my dumb brain) and not even a day later whenever I try to think of that guy I’m just like “meh, I mean he’s kinda a nice person but I don’t actually want to do anything like date.” I mean either way nothing woulda happened but I haven’t dated anyone so who fricking knows?!

You have no idea how annoying it can be to see people say stupid bull crap about others race or religion and no one else blinks an eye. It frustrates me to levels unknown and I’m only the kid that sees it happen, I mean I tell them to shut up but it never does anything so I can’t imagine what that person is going through.

Yeah I can kinda see how, because now you have to make sure that that date is ok and then people are going to ask. Tbh I may only be a freshman but believe me prom sounds absolutely horrible to me in the first place. XD Let me be honest, judging by the context you’re around 15 right? I’m a freshman at 15 years old and I’m pretty sure Im aro. How did you know you were?

So here's my experience, I'm 15 and have never once had a crush or a gf. I honestly don't care to do so, I just don't see the point because I know that I'd probably be happy but I don't really care that much. Whenever someone's asked me who my crush was I'd just say that it was one of my friends because hey that sounds right to me I guess! I've never really liked kissing in movies specifically or whole episodes of shows devoted to ones relationship, I didn't find it disgusting (kissing was though) I just wanted to get to the actual action of the story. All my life I've been in love with the idea of just living with my friends sorta roommate style and not marrying because all I need is a nice friendgroup! I've never really noticed others having crushes or being in a relationship unless it was so extremely obvious that it couldn't be ignored. Throughout middle school I never noticed kids get into relationships at all because I was just busy doing my own thing talking with my friends and just being myself. I never realized that the thought of not marrying was considered abnormal because I just thought that meant that you'd just be single and happy. Flirting has always sounded like some really dumb concept to me, I just don't get why someone wouldn't just outright confess their feelings because all logical sense says that it'd be easier if you don't flirt. I don't get grossed out by physical contact but it's still uncomfortable outside of family. I guess that my whole life I never valued romance at all, like if I was offered 100k to never marry, I'd do so in a heartbeat. In the very rare times that some has admitted they had a crush on me I sorta just tried to defuse it as politely as I could because I couldn't ever reciprocate. I mean, I've never even considered anyone as more than a friend in my life but if I ever dated I'd only do so after a LOT of time spent with that person as a friend. In my brain relationships go from some sort of process where it starts as friends, after a LONG time of knowing that person I'd possibly date (that sounds horrible in my head), and then get married if things work out. I mean let me be honest I never understand people that just walk up to some random person and go "Oh hey random stranger I don't even know! You wanna go to a restaurant with me and then kiss even though I could be a total freak and you wouldn't know?!" I just don't freaking get it! XD The thing is that I've only a couple of times thought I have crushes but every single time I stepped back I realized, I didn't love that person at all. I liked that person as a person, nothing more than that. Every time I thought that it was something more I always realized that I don't want to kiss, hold hands, or anything. I didn't even want to date! I never thought that there was anything wrong with that and I'm glad that I learned what aromanticism is at 15 instead of 30 but dang it, I wish I had waited 2 more years to know, that's when I could at least be so much more sure. That would be the age that I'd finally be able to put the pieces together and actually be sure enough to come out instead of having some twisted tsunami of mental exploration that makes intrusive thoughts and random questions that make me doubt everything I know. I've spent only a couple of weeks questioning, no OBSESSING over this because it feels right, but at the same time there's still some part of me in the back of my twisted mind that's thinking "what if you just want to be aro?" That part of my brain is crushing my own suspicions and driving me up the wall. I despise it so much I can't even describe it. I know I'm too young to be sure, I know that I shouldn't obsess, but here I am very likely just having some identity crisis that pointed me towards something that I'm too young to be sure about. I don't know if this is just me rambling or having a teenage identity crisis but the more I think things through the more it feels right. The more I obsess about something I know full well shouldn't be a concern until the end of high school, the more I'm convinced that I just don't feel anything, at least not yet. And yes, before I get this response, I know that the aro label is not something you have to set in stone, but I can not mentally live with not being sure of myself so I just want to wait until I actually do have it mentally set in stone. I haven't communicated my concerns with anyone other than some close friends but I just want to hear what others think to sort of mentally build up some sort of case that I may or may not be aro. Anyway I'm gonna stop talking before I spend 3 hours on this thing, tell me what you think if you can. :D

I'm like 15 and I'm on the verge of asking a friend of mine out (Yes I'd tell them my concerns) just to see if I feel anything at all. It sounds horrible and manipulative of me to even consider that but I just don't know if this is just me being too young or if my concerns are right. XD This is scary accurate. I know the definitions to both platonic and romantic relationships and the only difference I can conceptualize is that one doesn't have kissing. XD Whenever I'm asked that question I just say good personality and nice person. The exact same traits that I want in a friend.