phobia, culture, and human rights

[cute kitty Meow! Mewo!]

phobia is fear and aversion towards something. not knowing better is not phobia, someone not knowing that a certain aspect of humanity exists and is valid doesn't make them phobic or ignorant, and of course this doesn't prevent people from accidentally hurting others. But when you are hurt because of someone's views and words regarding them, that doesn't mean your rights are violated or that the person who hurt you intended to do so, and it certainly doesn't mean they are phobic. 

 

Our culture is not a phobic culture. If our culture is phobic of anything, it's phobic of dictatorship and denial of rights. But other than that? our culture is pretty diverse. There are many ways in which, considering the entirety of our population, we could, overall, be better educated about certain topics. but, this does not make our culture phobic of anything. Our culture is actually for the most part an accepting culture, and encourages discourse and opening up. even if this means competing views. but competing views is not phobia, is not a denial of rights, and is not intention to harm. 

 

We do not have a right to not be hurt, nor to not have certain things said to us or about us. We don't have a right to change others, or be regarded positively, we don't have a right to be accepted. It is very important to understand this. if someone has a view we find hurtful, they have a right to have that view, and we don't have a right to force them to change it. We have a right to expect them to change it, we have a right to hate them for not changing it. But if we believe that they should or must change their views, that they are somehow a bad person or a person who doesn't belong as part of our culture? then we are in denial of what rights an individual has and what rights an individual doesn't have.

 

Naturally I would encourage people to believe that they have the ability to sway someone's opinions using words. But this is different than believing that the other person must change their beliefs, for any reason. This is different from assuming other people are phobic or mean-spirited or rude just because they say something that states their opinions. Individuals have a right to believe what they wish and say what they wish accordingly. I can't stop anyone from believing harsh things of anyone else... but I do advise you the reader to, when you do, stop and think, and remind yourself that as much as you want them to change. They have as much rights to their thoughts and expression of thoughts as you do, and remind yourself that when a human is thinking and expressing themselves, then they are indeed being a good human, according to our culture's established beliefs regarding rights. 

[aussiekirkland]

I couldn't have put it better myself.

[techno]

I'm glad someone finally put it into words.

 

Uneducated/misinformed/unaware/confused/etc. does not equal bigoted/mean/phobic/etc.

We should seek to educate, not alienate. Aggressively shoving one's opinions down the throat of someone who probably didn't even realize they said anything that could be hurtful only makes human rights advocacy an aggressive and unpleasant space that a lot of people just won't want to be in. That's why a lot of people, even if they care a lot about equal rights, won't get involved, because they're not informed and are afraid someone will have a go at them if they say the wrong thing.

 

That's what I love about arocalypse. Most days. It's been a comfortable place to have discussions about things while still being respectful of everyone's individual opinions and the unique life they live every day. Of course we don't all always agree, but we understand each other, and if we say something that maybe we shouldn't have, I like being in a place where we can correct each other respectfully because life is a learning experience and no one is 100% right all the time.

 

I hope we can keep it that way.

[Philbo Wiseroot]

14 hours ago, techno-trashcan said:

I hope we can keep it that way.

I hope so too.

 

14 hours ago, techno-trashcan said:

Uneducated/misinformed/unaware/confused/etc. does not equal bigoted/mean/phobic/etc.

Or to put it another way: it's generally better to first assume ignorance over malice. Generally, someone who is open to learn will take your point that they were wrong (assuming a fact) and use the opportunity to better their understanding. I think you put to exactly right @techno-trashcan: life is a learning experience. There's not one person on this planet that was born knowing everything, and at the same time: everyone's experiences are important and we should learn from them. Treat everything as a lesson and you'll become a more well-rounded person.

[Louis On Air]

This is very nice to see. I always try to follow the word 'considerate' because it stands for accepting that other people struggle too and trying to reason with them because neither of you are right or wrong. If we stop discussing and questioning we'll all perish and free speech is the most precious thing after food and shelter. OK people say horrible things but instead of having free speech under certain conditions (unless it is genuine hate speech) we should just use our own freedom to not listen.

 

TLDR; Be considerate and let others speak too.

[cute kitty Meow! Mewo!]

I am actually unsure what to say when someone is inexperienced regarding a topic of discussion. for now i guess, I say they are inexperienced. because ignorance is actually more leaning towards the meaning of, ignoring knowledge because of bias, rather than not understanding due to lack of knowledge. I've recently started to think about how all things we can think about are basically, the game of chess. a chess master spent 10000 hours to be that good, and most people are just rookies who give up out of frustration early on. but the chess master while he might feel superior to the rookie, won't call the rookie trash or refuse to be his friend just because the rookie doesn't have the patience to play the game at all. 

 

but with personal matters, our emotions become intimately involved. it complicates things. I try to remind myself, when someone says something that hurts, that the reason they said it was only because they did not understand that it was hurtful in any way. if it's a person who is a part of my life, I hope to explain to them so they better understand what happened. but if it is a stranger, I try to shake off the feeling, or vent by ranting to a friend. because the stranger, even the friend, they are simply someone with their own games they play well, instead of the games that I play, and I'm just as clueless about their games really. if it is someone who cares about me, then I know that they want to learn how to play my games too. but the stranger, I might never see them again, they in fact shouldn't be wasting time learning my games, because learning is an opportunity cost, we can't learn everything, we can only learn so much in a given amount of time. 

[iigolden]

Yes, thank you!