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Aesthetic attraction is a jerk


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Who else here has spent so much time thinking that they liked people romantically because they found others pretty or had some emotional response to looks rather than a desire for romance? Share your experiences, it’s a real piece of crap sometimes to be confused about it. XD

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Yeah, I've had aesthetic attraction plus platonic bonds get mistranslated as sexual and romantic interest in people before. I just kind of assumed this is what everyone else was talking about. I always knew I didn't want a traditional romantic relationship by any stretch (and I cynically argued for many years in my youth that romantic love isn't real) but I also though that I should give it a try just to learn from the experience. It turns out it's hard to get into something you're not emotionally inclined towards, so I had to learn the hard way (fucking up a couple of friendships) that it's just not for me.

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5 minutes ago, Snao said:

Yeah, I've had aesthetic attraction plus platonic bonds get mistranslated as sexual and romantic interest in people before. I just kind of assumed this is what everyone else was talking about. I always knew I didn't want a traditional romantic relationship by any stretch (and I cynically argued for many years in my youth that romantic love isn't real) but I also though that I should give it a try just to learn from the experience. It turns out it's hard to get into something you're not emotionally inclined towards, so I had to learn the hard way (fucking up a couple of friendships) that it's just not for me.

Oh yeah, there’s some feeling from looking at someone of the opposite gender with me but it’s DEFINITELY not romantic. It’s just common and weak aesthetic attraction every single time. XD

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I don't have aesthetic attraction very often towards people, only twice so far, and only the first one hit me like a ton of bricks the first time. I assumed it was love at first sight and asked them out and got turned down. We became friends afterwards though, but since we were both pretty touchy people thought we were dating, which was weird and one person didn't let up on this even though pretty much everyone else in the group knew my friend was aroace.

I might have mixed the aesthetic attraction to the second person with romance if it wasn't already mixed with sensual attraction. I couldn't touch him despite wanting to and it bugged me for quite awhile, and I didn't start thinking he was pretty until college.

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