Erederyn Posted June 13, 2022 Share Posted June 13, 2022 Just need to vent. Recently, one of my best friends, who is the only a-spec person I know IRL, and I officially decided to live together. We're not necessarily going to have a partnership, but we are planning to live with each other long-term and plan certain aspects of our lives together. I'm not out to my parents, and they're not the most queer-friendly people, but I told them a couple months ago that this was my plan. They didn't outright say anything negative about it, but they keep talking about my future as if she's not going to be a part of it. Finally I told them that I'm serious about this plan and that because we both want the same things out of life (e.g., not getting married/having romantic partner and wanting to live with friends, among other things), that this is going to be long-term. That I'm planning on "settling down" with her. But still, they talk as if it's temporary. "How will you split up your furniture when you move out after a year or two? Why not just get an apartment for yourself and she can live in her own apartment somewhere close to you?" And other things about our relationship not being "permanent enough" (which no relationship is 100% guaranteed to be permanent anyway) and automatic assumptions that this is just a temporary thing until we each find romantic partners/spouses. My friend and I have been close friends for many years, so I'm very excited that this is finally working out for us. I want to be able to talk to my parents about my plans and be excited about apartment hunting and all that, but I'm frustrated with their attitude. It feels pretty invalidating and not fully supportive. I'll have to keep drilling it into their heads that this isn't some phase or transient "stepping stone" until I get married 😩 Amatonormativity once again being a thorn in my side 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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