i think i might be aromantic??

[Guest raye]

hi, so, I think I might be aromantic but I don't know for sure. I've identified as bisexual and non-binary for a couple of years (and my parents are absolutely not happy with that) but the idea of being aromantic has easily been the toughest for me to accept and come to terms with, and I don't even know if I am aromantic. 

I've never had a crush on anyone; I don't even know what a crush feels like, really. and I definitely don't understand the difference between romantic or platonic attraction -- like isn't a romantic relationship just like friends who kiss?? my friend said it isn't. and I really don't understand the whole expectations and social cues that come with romantic relationships. I think I feel sexual attraction though, but I'm confused about that too. like the only aromantic media I've seen is aroace people and I feel like I'm gonna be so alone if I can't have romantic relationships, you know? and logically I know that's not true but I can't help think it. 

I'm just so so so confused and kinda scared to be honest, so if you know anything that can help, I'd greatly appreciate it. Thank you :) 

[roboticanary]

If part of the problem is that all the media you see is specifically aroace, then a good thing to do might be to look for content which is specifically aro but not ace to see if that fits you better. One I would recommend as I found it helpful was a series of videos by a guy named Nick Hampshire. Look him up and maybe find them if you think it would be useful.

As for feeling you are going to be alone. try to work out why that is a fear for you.  In my case I have grown to be far more comfortable with bein alone as I get older and realise a lot of that 'fear' came not from me but from societal pressure. Once I sat down and thought about it it wasn't anywhere near as bad.

[Jot-Aro Kujo]

I'm aro and bisexual. It's not impossible. 

[raye]

On 5/30/2022 at 7:00 PM, roboticanary said:

One I would recommend as I found it helpful was a series of videos by a guy named Nick Hampshire. Look him up and maybe find them if you think it would be useful.

ok thank you so much for recommending nik hampshire. I've just binged like all of his videos; they were all amazing, and I would highly recommend them to anyone who thinks they might be aromantic but not asexual. 

[raye]

13 hours ago, Holmbo said:

Did it help you figure out if you feel sexual attraction but not romantic?

yes I think so. I'm pretty sure I'm bisexual and aromantic now. they were also really helpful regarding accepting aromanticism and dealing with the internalised arophobia. like, obviously I still have a hell of a long way to go because the idea still makes me very uncomfortable and kinda sad, but the videos helped a lot :) 

[Holmbo]

6 hours ago, raye said:

ok thank you so much for recommending nik hampshire. I've just binged like all of his videos; they were all amazing, and I would highly recommend them to anyone who thinks they might be aromantic but not asexual. 

Did it help you figure out if you feel sexual attraction but not romantic?