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have you ever been asked out? how did you respond?


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I was asked out today by a friend, and it basically confirmed my aro-ness.
I turned him down as nicely as possible, but the emotional fallout and replaying the moment in my head is tortureeeeee. I also discovered that while I like romance in my head/in fiction, I am more averse to it in real life than I thought I was.


What about you?

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I've been asked out a few times, and if it's a stranger I usually default to lying. "Oh, I have a boyfriend", "I just got out of a relationship", "I like girls", etc. But I do regret handling it like that because I don't think it's the best way.

With people I know, it's more "Sorry I'm not interested" or "Sorry I don't feel the same way"

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Before I knew what aromantic was, a girl asked me to prom. I tried to be nice, but I was definately blunt in saying, "That's not really my thing". I thought about it for days, and convinced myself to go on a camping trip during prom so I had an excuse for why I said no.

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Twice. First time when I was 12 or 13. I hated the guy at the time, so I just say "no, sorry", and I go away like a badass. It must have been embarrassing for my friend who organized the whole "ask out" thing because she was sure that me saying "I hate this guy" meant "I love that guy", for some reason. And the fact that I think about my friend's embarrassment, more than the embarrassment of the guy who were dumped in front of her, is a probably a very aro thing.

Second time it was a guy who followed me through whole high school, and when he asked me and I refused, he threatened to kill himself... Fortunately it was by e-mail, so I just talked about that to his mum so she takes care of the situation, and I never spoke to him again.

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