Aro pride is low at the moment for me

[piroshki101]

So as the title says I'm struggling to feel pride within my aromanticism because sometimes I don't feel aromantic enough. I'm demiplatonic and I have a squish on one of my friends or do I have two squishes? (basically do I have squishes on my best friends because I decided to befriend them during similar circumstances?...As in we bonded in being lonely...wait..HOLY SHIT!! Yeah that'd make sense...I know I'm conversing with myself but eh)..I dunno...I hang out with them a lot. Sometimes it feels invalidating because I know that people may think that there's something more between us, but like...noo...I would die because that sounds tiring af but in media omfg it's adorable) (sometimes)...he's just one of my bestest friends. Also I fucking love my friends to the earth, the stars, the universe, and all the way back again. Would literally die for them, but a romantic partner..nah dude...I'd be like...I'll help you and then avoid you. But yeah, what can I do?

[Jedi]

Aromantic enough for who exactly? Pride is great for owning who your are, but that has to be who you actually are. No need to replace the narrow box of societal expectation with an equally narrow bow of the experience of "the perfect aromantic" as if there even was such a thing. But also. You love your friends. I love my friends. That does not make us any less aromantic. We're allowed to have feelings.

[Holmbo]

The concept of feeling pride in an orientation comes from attempt to combat shame from culture. So as long as you don't feel shame I don't think pride is really necessary.

[piroshki101]

I...thank you I needed this. I guess I'm just afraid of being alone, ya know?

[The Gray Warlock]

On 8/21/2022 at 1:36 AM, Holmbo said:

The concept of feeling pride in an orientation comes from attempt to combat shame from culture. So as long as you don't feel shame I don't think pride is really necessary.

That's just someone trying to convince themselves they don't feel shame when they do. Trying to "combat" a negative self image with a positive one is an ego game that only ends with frustration. The better way would be to process negative feelings, understand their source and effects, and let go of them.

[Holmbo]

10 hours ago, The Gray Warlock said:

That's just someone trying to convince themselves they don't feel shame when they do. Trying to "combat" a negative self image with a positive one is an ego game that only ends with frustration. The better way would be to process negative feelings, understand their source and effects, and let go of them.

Pride in terms of LGBT+ is more than the feeling itself. It's the wider concept of promoting self-affirmation, dignity, equality, and increased visibility of people within the community. So I do think the pride movement has an important purpose. But I don't think individual people need to feel proud about an orientation.

14 hours ago, piroshki101 said:

I...thank you I needed this. I guess I'm just afraid of being alone, ya know?

That's a very normal fear. Do you feel more afraid now than you use to?

[piroshki101]

I realized that my friends probably were the greatest so I'm gonna try to befriend people who aren't as toxic.