piroshki101

So I remember when I used to think that someone would just like me and then everything that society told me would come true. Then my sister told me that i needed a bit more self-love and so I worked on loving myself a bit more and then I discovered I was aromantic and asexual. Also my sister knew that I was ace before I knew...I mean she literally asked me if I was ace once, but I digress. Another funny thing was that I thought that I could fall in love with someone from another country...turns out that finding people's accents pretty does not equate to attraction.

Saw some archived thing in aromantic relationships and it was about healthy friendships and how abusive one's are overlooked (on the 18th page and it's the topic at the very bottom if anyone wants to look at it). It made me realize that I got out of a toxic friendship with another aro-spec, as well physical boundaries weren't respected, they didn't listen when I set boundaries, they never really communicated anything, they tried to make decisions for me, they were definitely manipulative to a degree, they weren't non-judgemental from what I remember, and they didn't admit their mistakes. So that's most boundaries being failed which left me to not feel respected by said person. There was also another person who did very similar things, though a bit more convulted as they also didn't take accountability for their mistakes, I always felt scared around them, so I'd say intimidation was a lot (this person was also aro-spec). I began to realize that I deserved better. Once I realized they were toxic, though I'd known these people for 5 years and I decided to cut ties.

I asked some classmates of mine (awhile back) when they first got "crushes" and there was a huge range of answers. Some felt their "crushes" around kindergarten, while others felt it around elementary school. Also I definitely agree that there would be conflations of different attractions.

I 100% agree that gender doesn't really exist as it's a construct. And for me, before really knowing that I was trans, I first learned about the term non-binary. I'd also experienced dysphoria through puberty, but I didn't know what it was back then. When I was younger, I knew that I wasn't a boy or a girl, but I was scared to question, so I tried my best to perform as my assigned gender. I wasn't really happy, and a video taught me about the term non-binary and after my very long repressed feelings, I decided to face my fears and around that time I also realized "Hmm...wait a damn moment...if I don't vibe with my assigned gender, then...then I'm trans...holy shit!". So yeah the reason I know that I'm trans is really cause I don't vibe with my assigned gender, as it just never felt right.

There were a lot of signs when I was younger, as I'd never had any crushes. I kinda just ignored it (did the same thing with my gender identity). Then I read loveless and watched Jaiden's video and I was like "I might as well just accept it!". I did figure out I was ace before though because I legit thought sexual attraction was a joke, but figuring out I was aro was harder for me to accept so it took longer for me to find out.

I watched Yuri on Ice and one of the Yuri's ate a piroshki and I was like damn...that looks good, I should try that at some point. Basically the food caught my eye, so yeah. The 101 part doesn't have much significance. So yeah, food is so fucking good.

aroace and an INFP-T

So I had figured out that I was ace. And one of the biggest signs was just giving up on stories with romance in them because I thought that they were boring. I also didn't realize that people actually had the desire to date someone (or multiple people). When I was in middle school I hadn't liked a goddamn soul. I thought that if I moved somewhere else that maybe I could just fall in love somehow, which was also wrong. I realized that I'd probably get comfortable with myself and friends, and then I kinda just ignored that feeling. I had no idea what attraction was and I still don't get it, though I can guess what others feel. I thought that I was pansexual/panromantic because I just loved everyone. I thought that everyone had a story to tell, and that was beautiful, so I thought "mmm yes...that must mean romance, totally...wouldn't date anyone....but I feel some attraction, right?!". And then I read loveless and my brain just went "this is more relatable then usual....wait...NONONONononno...no...not another crisis...AHHHHH!!". I looked up aroaceflux and was like "maybe that could be me?". The problem was I always felt aro and ace, everyday, but I was kinda desperate and wished to have some amount of attraction. Then I watched Jaiden animations "Being not straight" video and I started to accept that I was aroace and that there was nothing wrong with that. I delve into some research and now I've arrived where I am today (also I had a gender crisis going on at the same time and have concluded I'm transmasc and nonbinary). So yeah, there were so many signs and I ignored them simply because I wanted to fit in. Once I stopped trying to fit in, I started to question and you know the rest.

That'd be pretty cool

I realized that my friends probably were the greatest so I'm gonna try to befriend people who aren't as toxic.

I FUCKING LOVE BEING AROACE!!! I've realized that I should just sit back and enjoy life with friends/familial relationships. It's fucking awesome!! Sorry for my amount of cursing but my whole childhood I always tried to find someone and I never did, but now I realize that I can breathe for the first time. I've known I'm aromantic since January, so 7-ish months, and nothing has changed. Figuring out I was polyamorous was a bit of a curveball but now I'm just relaxed again. I'm excited for what the world has in store for me. I'm excited for what I can create in my life (art, stories, and lifelong friends). Basically, being aromantic is one of the coolest things that could've ever been a part of me :)

I love being aro because I feel so free. I can finally just live my life without that much drama. I can create the drama through stories or read 'em cause that's enough. I also can finally breathe because there is no pressure to get into a relationship. I know that I'm loved and cared for by my friends and that's enough for me because I wouldn't have it any other way :)

That is absolutely fabulous!! I sent a post on reddit, but they thought I was confused (to a degree) so, uh...I dunno, but I'm glad to know that I'm not the only one. HURRAH!!!

Well hello there, I think I might be polyamorous but you see I'm aroace. I dunno how it'd work, but I guess I realized I'm not as non-partnering as I thought. Like I don't particularly want to date people, but it'd be nice to be around be and sort of have a family? Am I making any sense? That's basically why polyamory doesn't seem too bad for me as I just want to be around people even if I can't give them you know the stuff they want.

It really does