Adexsexual term, Whats your idea?

[BloodyBlood]

so just someone on site reddit told me i may be Adesexual and here the link : https://lgbta.wikia.org/wiki/Adexsexual

it says :

Adexsexual is an ace-spec greysexual microlabel in which someone is internally allosexual but externally asexual. Adexsexuals find some individuals sexually attractive and arousing in the fantasy/idea of having sex with them oneself. It fades when actually focusing on them in real life, next to them. Focusing on the idea again or going away restores it.

One is allo-ish when alone, and can fantasize/watch/read about sex in first-person and enjoy/want it. The more physically present/tangible the external partner becomes, the more ace-ish one gets. Allosexuality is naturally suppressed by the presence of individuals in real life, even those one fantasizes about. It is not suppressed by the presence of self, unlike in aegosexuality.

Actual sex can be very difficult and feel like a job, and even if it is somewhat enjoyable, it doesn't compare to the expectation. One can desire sex with someone if they have an idea of it at a distance, but in front of that individual, that desire is gone. It doesn't depend on reciprocity of others, only on the presence of others. One is capable of being a bit allo-ish even during sex if dissociating strongly or experiencing kinks and trying to ignore the individual next to oneself.

Random short sexual attraction, sexual desire or libido spikes next to another person are possible but extremely fleeting. Indirect sexual acts like masturbation also get much harder in the presence of any person.

The romantic/aesthetic/sensual/platonic equvalents are adexromantic/adexaesthetic/adexsensual/adexplatonic.

 

 

So whats your opinion about this orientation? Im not gonna invalid this but i was wondering , is it really A Spectrum ? if yes can i just identify as Ace Spectrum orr...

[such]

This sounds to me a lot like aegosexual. If you're familiar with aegosexuality, do you think there's a distinction somewhere? 

But because of the similarity that jumps out at me, I would say definitely aspec. 

[GoodbyeRepublicServices]

1 hour ago, such said:

This sounds to me a lot like aegosexual. If you're familiar with aegosexuality, do you think there's a distinction somewhere? 

I just looked up both terms. A difference I've found between the two is that aegosexuals don't imagine themselves in their own sexual fantasies, while adexsexuals do.

[such]

16 hours ago, RepublicServicesVolunteer said:

I just looked up both terms. A difference I've found between the two is that aegosexuals don't imagine themselves in their own sexual fantasies, while adexsexuals do.

Ah okay, makes sense!

[Apex]

Ah, this kinda fits me.

Although I don't think "includes self in sexual fantasies" warrants the coining of a new term- aegosexual could cover both experiences.

As for whether this "counts" as aspec I'd say yeah, but I can also see people experiencing this and considering themselves low-libido or sex-neutral/repulsed allosexuals.

[Guest]

On 11/25/2021 at 12:01 AM, Apex said:

Ah, this kinda fits me.

Although I don't think "includes self in sexual fantasies" warrants the coining of a new term- aegosexual could cover both experiences.

As for whether this "counts" as aspec I'd say yeah, but I can also see people experiencing this and considering themselves low-libido or sex-neutral/repulsed allosexuals.

As an aegosexual, i do sometimes fantasize about myself having sex with my crushes but it’s so rare. So i can kind of relate to it a bit. 

[SkyTuneRein]

I don't like to nit-pick, but, this is how your post appears to me with the default theme:

😸

[DeltaAro]

How does one find such stuff? Sounds like fraysexual / aegosexual to me.

This label is so micro, it's already gone and the link is broken. 😜

[DeltaAro]

22 hours ago, Cocothecoconut said:

As an aegosexual, i do sometimes fantasize about myself having sex with my crushes but it’s so rare. So i can kind of relate to it a bit. 

I sympathize with aegosexuality or fraysexuality somewhat: to me real sex vs. fantasy & masturbation is like: a nutritious meal vs. a tiny bite from a chocolate bar. 🙃

While it is not easy for me to maintain sexual attraction towards someone if things reached a "maximally escalated level", in the end real sex has waaaay more of an impact. It does not even compare. Fantasy + masturbation OTOH is "file and forget".