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How do I tell if I'm aegoromantic? (kinda questioning)


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Okay, so... I'm a pan oriented aroace and when it comes to microlabels I'm 100% sure I'm a sex averse aegosexual with medium/high libido (I'm not sure yet). But how do I tell if I'm also aegoromantic or just a romance indifferent aro? I know I'm one of those, but I'm not sure which one. Are there any signs of being aegoromantic? Is there some kind of "you may be aegoromantic if" checklist? It was easy for me go figure out I was aegosexual but I have a problem with figuring out if I'm just aro or if I'm also aegoromantic. So I'm kinda stuck on this one. I would appreciate any help from you guys.

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  • 4 weeks later...

i'm assuming you already found your answer for this question but i'm gonna answer in case a guest has the same doubt. (and because i feel sad when seeing the 0 replies ?‍♀️)

applying the aegosexual checklist to a romantic context would be my way to go to figuring out my romantic orientation, or generally any sexuality but simply changing the sexual context. even the definitions can be similar, it all depends on whether it's sexual or romantic attraction.

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  • 3 months later...

Hey! Hopefully you’ve had some help with this considering it’s been a while since you posted this but I wanted to add my experiences, plus I just made an account.

I’m aegoromantic, I’ve always known I was aro but just found my micro label. I don’t ever want romance or a relationship for myself, but I’m like a “hopeless romantic” type. I enjoy reading or seeing romance in media specifically (and 99% of it is LGBT) and I get gratification from that. Like how people get the fluttery warm feelings when they have someone? I am able to feel some semblance of that from viewing it from an outsiders perspective, knowing I’m not involved. I don’t like PDA or having any romantic feelings/actions pointed at me. 
If I ever have any romantic fantasies, they’re exclusively with fictional characters or celebrities, strictly unattainable. 
I was in a relationship for 5 years and now that I’m out of it, I can see how unhappy I was. It never met my idealized version of what romance should be, of what I fantasized about because what I wanted was just a fantasy and actually being in a romantic relationship felt wrong and unsatisfying. I’d consume media and get my “romantic needs” met through that. That always left me feeling happy and fulfilled, while having a real and actual partner left me feeling lackluster and honestly quite annoyed that I had to share my life/space/etc with someone else. 
That’s pretty much my take and experience with romance, I hope this helps a little bit or just gives you an insight into the micro label. I’m sure there’s tons of other perspectives on it, but at least here’s mine. Good luck!

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