Non-binary gender

[BlueKumul]

How is it defined?

 

Does a tomboyish girl or effeminate boy count? Or do you have to experience body dysphoria?

[lonelyace]

To be non binary is to have a gender that is not 100% male or 100% female. This is about gender identity, not gender expression. You can be very masculine in your presentation and still be a girl, or feminine in presentation and still be a boy. These things are still binary genders because the person is still male or female.  Non binary folks have a gender that, as I said before, is not 100% male or 100% female. This can look a lot of different ways. It could be both or neither or or changing. You could feel somewhat but not entirely connected with one gender, or you could feel like something else entirely. 
 

I hope this helps explain things. 

[Morgenfluss]

In general, to be a different gender than the one you were assigned at birth you have to at least feel a disconnection to your birth sex. For most people this is dysphoria. There are different times of dysphoria: Social dysphoria (feeling sick and/or wrong when referred to as your birth sex) and body dysphoria (feeling wrong/sick with your sex characteristics). Some also say that there's mind dysphoria, which is when you refer to yourself as your birth sex and feel sick.

 

Personally, I believe, that you would need to feel dysphoric in order to be some form of transgender -- binary or non-binary.

 

In general, take your time to figure things out. Experiment to see what you're most comfortable with. I wish you the best of luck, figuring it out!

[BlueKumul]

@Morgenfluss , I don't experience any form of dysphoria, I only want to understand the concept. I don't like some aspects of Western masculinity, though, like the expectation to watch porn, enjoy all-male gathering, drink beer,  not to have close female friends if you don't want to sleep with them etc. I was actually bullied for these reasons and it made me question my gender identity back in 2007 or so, but I overcame this dilemma and don't want to go back to it. So I am male, but a different kind of male than they, thus I use "androgynous male". Androgynous refers to my personality and presentation, male to my body image.

[nonmerci]

You don't have to feel body dysphoria in the sense that you don't have to not be confortable with your body : you can be non-binary and be confortable with a female or male body. The same way transman or transwoman don't always want to change their sex.

At the same time, not doing what society expect from a male or a female doesn't makes you trans. You can be a tomboyish girl and still be a girl. If I take my own case, I'm girl who don't wear make-up and love ties, but also dresses. I don't see that being a girl affects my identity or my behaviour, or why it shoud affect them. But at the same time, I still identify as a girl, so I'm not trans at all.