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Could i be aromantic if I can see my self having kids and a husband when I'm older?


Human

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Would be I be aromantic if I see myself having a husband and kids later on in life? I think that i will grow out of this thing of not feeling attracted to anyone, as I am only thirteen and had two relationships I didn't feel romantically or sexually attracted to. I have had the odd moment where I can imagine myself being in a relationship with someone, but I didn't want it. ?

 

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Since you are 13, in this case “you are too young to know” is a valid answer for once.

6 hours ago, Human said:

Would be I be aromantic if I see myself having a husband and kids later on in life?

It is possible. It's normal to want something which is connected with happiness by society. Or maybe you genuinely want it – companionship and a family – even that's compatible with being aromantic.

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I'm not sure that wanting to have children has anything much to do with someone's romantic (or sexual) orientation.

In terms of the husband it might be worth asking if that's what you actually want or if it's something which might an acceptable "second best" living in an amantonormative society.

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My opinion is that you most certainly can be.

 

I myself want to get married, but I envision the relationship as being more of a very deep friendship, rather than a romantic relationship. A QPP more or less, whether that is what we call it or not.

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You still can. I'm also the type that's open to the consideration of having a family of my own in the future, but in a non-traditional and social-normative/amatonormative way. Maybe as civil/domestic partners than a legally and/or religiously-recognized marriage.

 

A 'husband' is also considered in the equation, but seen more as a platonic companionate life partner that I have carefully and properly discussed, planned and consented with to raise/co-parent a child or children together in one roof without the romance and sex (especially if the guy could be really hesitant because of the whole sexless and romanceless marriage/partnership and family dynamic).

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