Holmbo

On 12/24/2022 at 6:59 PM, Jigen said:

In Poland on the pride parades they almost always yell "love is love". It's so… eh. I'm tired of it and of trying to inform people about being aro.

Does everyone have to yell the same though? It makes sense to me that everyone would yell what feels best for them.

2 hours ago, Nix said:

Thanks for sharing! The book she wrote looks interesting too, I’m putting that on my wishlist.

(Marisa Franco: Platonic: How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make — And Keep — Friends.)

Agreed. I'm gonna buy it if it's available for my ebook

1 hour ago, Jigen said:

Being aro is generally treated this way because of the whole amatonormativity thing. There's also another problem: lack of visibility in the LGBTQ+ community. Just, look. The most visible and loudest part of the LGBTQ+ community keeps yelling about "love is love", not even noticing us.

I personally never see this. But maybe it's because most Swedes kinda ignore each other so don't really care who loves who.

Good article about friendships importance

https://www.cbc.ca/radio/tapestry/just-friends-this-author-wants-us-to-rethink-the-way-we-view-platonic-love-1.6689272

On 12/20/2022 at 2:50 PM, Disco Cow said:

anyways that's why I couldn't finish the hunger games.

I feel like the relationships in the hunger games are a pretty aro mood. Katniss wants a friend to support and care for her in this very frightening life she's living but the boys keep Romo zoning her.

Yeah it's very annoying!

I also feel for other groups who have similar stereotyping done to them. For example aspec people.

Imagine how much potential story there is if writers would explore outside the stereotypes and not just use these go to lazy tropes. Also the way many writers doesn't even seem to know how to write a character arc without some sex and romance escalator included.

I was looking at pictures of a comic I read as a child and it occurred to me how strange the visual ques to indicate gender are in much of children's media.

If the characters are animals like in this case it seems the go to method is to add eye lashes to the female characters. Even when its a child. When you think about it it's kinda weird. Human girl children doesn't have longer eyelashes than boys. I think it would be better to skip the lashes and just have the animal children have similar looking faces. What do you think?

If aromanticism was your religion, which book would you swear on in court to symbolize this?

The Journal of Allergy and Clinical Immunology

@PhoebeFrogThanks for sharing

14 hours ago, Guest Art said:

I hate that I was made this way right now. Usually I’m really proud but I’m really upset I can’t love one of my best friends the way they want. I love them with all my heart and it truly breaks me to know I’m half of why they’re depressed. I hate how it feel I’m leading them on just by being their friend without even meaning to and it absolutely sucks. 

That sucks, I'm sorry.

If it helps you could consider that your friend also can not love you the way you want, non romantically, and it makes you feel bad. We always view romantic love as somehow more than platonic, but why couldn't you as well be sad about being put in the room zone? No one is to blame here.

Updated from the fika. Everyone who was going to attend was sick except two people. We had a nice fika the three of us, drinking mulled wine, tea and eating ginger bread cookies and saffron spunge cake.

Totally! There's a famous comedian and writer in Sweden Jonas Gardell who talked about this. I don't have the exact quote but he said something like "part of growing up is deciding what values you want to have"

Sweden is so dark this time of year. I'm usually a pretty extroverted person but right now I don't feel the need to do much except the bare necessities. It doesn't feel bad though. I'm just hibernating waiting for the sun to come back. Tomorrow I'm having some friends and relatives over for a mulled wine fika.

On 10/28/2022 at 9:10 PM, nonmerci said:

 

(I still don't get why people think we are more romantic than other countries)

Your comment made me think about this song? Although it's joking more about the idea that everything French is sexy.

How annoying! Just ignore them and they'll get bored with it eventually.

23 minutes ago, whatistheromance said:

If you mean the title (Advice I would give my younger aro self) Invest in bitcoin.

If you mean someone new to aromanticism, I'd say: DONT LISTEN TO THE NAYSAYERS 

Hehe, I was thinking a general thread of sharing personal insights about being aromantic. Wisdom we've learned that might be useful to others.

On 7/10/2020 at 7:54 AM, chairdesklamp said:

Since everyone's talking about the colours, I'm only guessing this site isn't grey. Aros seem to be more stuck on the colour than anyone else, and it just *has* to be the one I have the most trouble with and that makes me feel pretty rotten. 

The background for the text is grey but headings have a green background and there's green and gray colors at the top.

Maybe we should add an arrow to the aro pride flag. Would that help you?

For those of you who have been identifying as aromantic, or similar, for a while. What have you learned? Any advice you would give to someone more new to the identity?

7 hours ago, Acecream said:

I can totally understand that people don't want to be stucked in the same conversations ever and ever again, but at the same time I think it's totally precious for younger queers to have older queers who lived a long time with their identities because even if it doesn't seem to be important to them anymore they have so much to give to others! but of course they don't owe younger queers anything

That's a good point.

9 hours ago, Storm_leopardcat said:

Perhaps? I'm assuming it does, as platonic and romantic attraction certainly seem to (to an extent, romantic attraction seems to have a lot more of this, and stronger, too).
It is an emotional attraction!

I feel like most platonic attraction has much less worship than a romantic one.

I also wonder, what kind of attraction would you call someone being attracted to be a follower? Like attracted to a leader of some kind, be it spiritual, business etc. I was reflecting if that could be seen as alterous attraction. If you're attracted emotionally. Not just following them for some practical reason.

Would alterous attraction have aspect of worship to it? I'm thinking about older types of relationships and how there sometimes seem to be a bit of awe to them.

42 minutes ago, deep_inlove said:

oh because we see each other at least twice a year for several days 

Maybe you shouldn't then

Record of a space born few has an aro allo pov.

12 hours ago, deep_inlove said:

I wish it was that easy but we live 1000km away from each and we don't even speak all that much 

Why is hugging or holding hands a concern then?